Shape of My Heart

CHAPTER NINE

The next morning, I woke up wrapped in Nick’s arms. Apparently we had both fallen asleep on the floor. “Good morning sleepy heads.” Mrs. Carter said in a sing-song voice. “I’ve made waffles.” Mrs. Carter opened the door and brought in a tray with two plates of waffles. I sat up and rubbed my eyes.

“Good morning, Mrs. Carter.” I said sleepily and nudged Nick awake. He let out a snore and woke up.

“What?” Nick woke up and rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. “Oh. Morning mom.” He smiled. “Waffles?” His mom nodded and looked at us.

“Well, I’ll let you two eat then…” She smiled and set the tray down.

“So,” Nick coughed and took a bite of waffles. “how did you sleep last night?”

“You’re not supposed to talk with your mouth full, Nick.” Nick rolled his eyes and swallowed. “I slept very well. And you?” I asked him and took a bite of my waffles.

“Very good. Though, I kept waking up because I kept feeling something next to me, and then I would realize it was you, and I was okay.” He smiled and kissed my cheek.

“So… did we ever go back onto the bed? Or did we just fall asleep on the floor?” I asked and took another bite of my waffles.

“Well, we were on the bed, but then the rough sex threw us onto the floor.” Nick winked at me.

“Oh, yes. The sex that never happened? I remember that now.” I playfully pushed him away.

“How do you know?” Nick asked in a playful manner.

“I think I would remember losing my virginity, Nickolas.” I rolled my eyes as Nick choked on his orange juice.

“You’re still a virgin?!” Nick looked shocked. I nodded. “Even though you lived with Aaron for two years?”

“Yes!” I felt a bit insulted. “Just because I lived with him doesn’t mean I did anything with him. I didn’t do anything, and I mean anything, with him.” I shuttered at the thought.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to insult you, honey.” He grabbed my hand. “It’s just… Aaron. I would think he would have charmed his way into your pants. He usually does that.” He squeezed my hand.

“Nick,” I sighed as he put his arm around me and kissed my cheek. “I really don’t know what I was thinking with him. Maybe I was just trying to make you jealous with him… but along the way, I really did fall for him at one point.” I bit my lip and looked up at Nick, expecting to see anger written across his face in big, black, bold letter. But I saw a familiar smile on his face instead.

“Do you not think that’s what I was doing with Marcy, Paris, and every other girl I dated?” He asked. “I never really knew that I would be with you until we kissed for the first time, Katie. When I kissed you and just walked on, I actually looked back to see you standing there in shock. Two things entered my mind ‘there were definitely sparks there’ and it’s true. There were sparks, and there still are.” He smiled down at me and took another drink of his orange juice.

“And what was the other thing?” I asked, curious.

“Well that, is for another time, Kit-Kat.” He shrugged it off as I pouted.

“Nick! Katie! We’re about to leave, so if you guys are going, you may want to go!” Mr. Cater called from downstairs.

“We can get showers at the house.” Nick smiled and got up. “We’ll be right down!” Nick grabbed the tray of food and helped me off the ground. After thirty minutes of ‘good-byes’ and promises to visit again, Nick and I were finally on the road back to our house. “Happy birthday, Katie.” He smiled at me and kissed my hand.

“Don’t remind me I’m getting older.” I groaned and relaxed into the passenger seat.

“Well, I’m not getting any younger either!” Nick laughed. “So, I’ve been wanting to ask you something for a few months, and I know it’s your birthday, but you can’t ignore this forever.” Nick sighed and put both hands back on the wheel. “I know your mom’s in the hospital, Katie.” I sighed frustrated.

“If I wanted you to lecture me on how I should go see my mother, I would have told you when my dad called three months ago.”

“Katie, I know your mom said she didn’t want anything to do with you after you moved out, but she’s still your mother.”

“You don’t understand. In the past five years I haven’t gotten a single call, letter, postcard, anything! I’ve tried to call her, and you were there every time I did, and she’s made no effort to pick up.” I could feel my throat tightening up. “Plus, if she wanted me to see her, she would have said so.” I stared at the window to hide my tears from Nick.

“Katie-”

“I don’t want to talk about it.” I said as tears rolled down my cheeks.

“Okay, well all I’m going to say is that if you want to see her, all you have to do is ask for a ride.”

“I don’t want to see her.” I said harshly and Nick sighed. The rest of the ride home was quiet except for a few sniffles from me. When we finally got back to the house I stormed to the front door and went up the stairs to my room.

“Katie? Sweetie, come on. I didn’t mean to upset you.” Nick said as he walked into my room.

“You didn’t upset me.” I sighed. “It’s just hard having a mother, who you used to adore, not want anything to do with you.” I wiped my eyes dry and sat on my bed. “And it feels like no one knows what I’m going through. I love you to bits, Nick, but not even you do.” I said before he could interrupt. “Your mom has always been like a mother to me, but it’s still like... it’s not my mom.” Nick put his arm around me.

“Katie, I don’t know what you’re going through, but it’s breaking my heart to see you so shook up about this.”

“I’m not upset about my mom being in the hospital, so much as the fact she’s not the one who told me.” I sighed and got up. “I’m going to take a shower now.” I grabbed some fresh clothes and walked down the hall to the bathroom. As the hot water hit my back I began to think what it would be like to see my mom again. Would I want our reunion to be at the side of a hospital bed? Or should it be when she’s better and can run to me? Would she even be glad to see me? There was an ear-piercing scream that interrupted my thoughts. “Nick!?” I called and got out of the shower. “Nick!?”

“I’m going to kill her!” Nick yelled. I wrapped a towel around myself and went into the hallway. Nick barged down the hallway.

“What happened?” I asked as he passed me. He was holding what looked like a broken guitar… oh no.

“She broke my lucky guitar! She broke it!” Nick threw down the guitar, frustrated. “I’ll sue… that’s what I’ll do!” Nick was talking to himself.

“Nick, you can’t. It’s a guitar. I know it was your favorite, but come on. Be reasonable.” I placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Trespassing. I’ll sue for trespassing!”

“She had a key, Nick.” I tried to comfort him. Nick sighed in frustrated.

“Anything you want me to do?” I asked and kissed his cheek. He shook his head and sighed again.

“I’ll be in my room if you need me.” He picked up his guitar and went to his room. I sighed and went to finish my shower.