Falling Inside the Black

The snow crunched under my boots as I stalked across the alleys of Hogsmeade. Remus was at my side following as I window shopped until something caught my eye and we would go in the small shops. I was doing a little bit of Christmas shopping just a few small things for some of the professors, Remus, Dumbledore, and Harry. The freezing snow nipped at me through my coat and sweater my cheeks and nose reddening at the cold temperature.

“One more stop at Honeydukes then we can go to the Three broom sticks. “ I said to Remus readjusting some of the bags that hung from my forearms. He nodded and walked ahead of me to open the door. The small shop was packed full of students and a few teachers and suddenly a smile appeared across my face and I felt as if I was a student again. I walked over to the back wall and began grabbing sugar quils, Bertie Bott’s Every flavored beans, Cauldron Cakes, Chocoballs, Crystallized Pineapple, Sugared Butterfly wings, Chocolate wands and a few more sweets before maneuvering to the counter.

“Hello Mrs. Flume.” I greeted the older red haired woman. She looked up at the sound of my voice.

“Oh Ella!” she gasped dropping the sweets in her hands and shimmying around the counter and grabbing me in a hug . I hugged her back as best I could chuckling slightly.

“Merlin child! You haven’t aged a day and still as beautiful as ever!” she exclaimed.
I chuckled “Thank you Mrs. Flume. How have you been?”

“Oh good good! Still as busy as we were when you and the boys came on the weekends!” she beamed. “Doing some Christmas shopping?” she asked returning back behind the counter.

“Yes ma’m just a little” I laughed emptying my arms onto the counter. I felt Remus place a hand on my side as he took his place behind me and greeted Mrs. Flume as well.

“Oh how the two of you bring back memories.” She beamed happily studying the two of us as she bagged the sweets and paid her taking the coins out of my peacock printed coin pouch.

“Well have a Merry Christmas you two” she smiled handing me my bag.
We left the warmth of the store and ventured back into the icy cold. I tapped the bags with my wand as they vanished to Remus’ room back at Hogwarts. He offered me his arm and I graciously took it huddling closer to him to absorb his body heat. We finally made it to the Three Broomsticks. The warm, smoky interior was as inviting as always. I made my way to a table in the back waiting as Remus went to grab our drinks. He returned with an entire bottle of Fire Whisky and two wine glasses. He filled our glasses and settled in to the chair. The crackling fire warmed our chilled bodies accompanied by the Fire whisky. The silence was comfortable for a moment as I played with a slice of bread from the basket Rosmerta had brought.

“Remus” I mumbled I could see him look up at me from the slice of bread he was eating. “Do you remember the night” I gulped “the night that Leo died?’

“I try not to” he replied laying his glass back down on the table and resting back in his seat. “You were so distraught that night you couldn’t even think straight…. Why?”

“I’ve just been thinking” I started sliding the pad of my finger around the top of my glass “Only the members of the Order knew how to counteract and open the charms and spells that we used to protect the house. How did Bellatrix and the others get in? I know I put all the charms and spells back.”

“Maybe Sirius…” he started softly.

“Sirius didn’t do this!” I snapped maybe a little louder than I should since a few of the people surrounding us turned their attention to us. I glared at them causing them to go back to their drinks before turning back to Remus.

“Padfoot didn’t betray me and his son that night” I growled under his breath “Maybe Lily and James but Not Leo and I.” I sighed regaining my composure I leaned back and sighed. “It had to be someone else..”

“And who do think it was then Ella?” Remus asked seeming agitated by my accusations.

“I don’t know” then something clicked. “What if Padfoot was right?” I asked. “What if it was Peter?”

“Now why would Peter betray you, Sirius, Leo, Lily, James it just doesn’t make sense.” Remuse tried to reason.

“I don’t know maybe he got into the wrong crowd. You and I both know Peter was easily……. Persuaded. But why would Padfoot betray his wife, his son, his best friends and his godson. Padfoot had more to lose than Peter did.”

“And why exactly are you accusing Peter of this?” he asked. I looked down twisting my ring around me right finger. When Sirius was sent away and everyone had made me believe he was a murderer I moved the ring from my left finger to my right I couldn’t bear to throw it away.

“Because he told me…..”

~*********~

“But our love it was stronger by far than the love
Of those who were older than we-
Of many far wiser than we-
And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.”

I smiled as my eyes scanned over the poetry of Edgar Allan Poe. I glanced at the clock seeing it was almost ten. Sirius had left a few hours ago to check on Peter he hadn’t been around for the last few days and Sirius had grown unbelievably concerned. I cuddled further into leather of the couch with the scarlet Gryffindor blanket draped over my knees. It had been a year since Leo’s death and I was slowly coping with my son being gone but Sirius was helping me more than anything. Even if he too was suffering we suffered together. I readjusted the book on my lap and continued reading.

“For the moon never beams without bringing me dreams
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And the stars never rise but I feel the bright eyes
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee;
And so, all the night-tide, I lie down by the side
Of my darling- my darling- my life and my bri-“

A loud commotion came from the foyer along with pain filled sobs.

“Sirius?” I called placing my book on the coffee table and jumping up. Sirius was leaning against the door his body trembling with cries and his face buried in his hands.

“Sirius” I whispered running to him I grabbed hold of his arms to bring his hands down. He launched himself at me wrapping his arms around my frame and burying his head in the nook of my neck.

“Sirius” I whispered receiving a muffled response “Sirius whats wrong?”
He pulled away his face red and tear stained. I cupped his face gently concern and worry evident in my posture. He took a deep breath beginning to walk backwards with me into the den with shaky breaths.

“H-he killed them! He killed them Ella! They’re dead. Gone!” he yelled.

“W-who? I thought you were checking on Peter?”

“Peter betrayed them Ella! James and Lily they’re gone! “ He yelled again crumbling to the floor pulling me with him. Tears pouring out of his eyes as I pulled him to me tears falling from my eyes as well.

“J-James he was on the s-steps and L-Lily was in H-Harry’s room. Both dead.” He sobbed

“I-is Harry ok?” I asked. I felt Sirius nod in my chest and I sigh of relief escaped my lips.

“Sirius” I whispered pulling his face to look at mine. “Why would Pe-“

Before I could finish my sentence a loud bang was heard at the door before either of us could react the front door was blown off its hinges. Sirius’ blocked my body with his as shards of wood fell around us. Four Hit wizards stood in our doorway with grim looks on their faces.

“Sirius Black” one barked. I felt Sirius grip tighten on me as they advanced towards us. He turned towards me one last time cupping my face with his left hand. I could feel his gold wedding ring burn against my skin from the cold.

“ I love you Ella.” He whispered pressing his lips to mine just as the Hit Wizards surrounded him pulling him away from me.

“Why- Why are you taking him?” I asked standing up as they clasped the metal cuffs around his wrists and searched him for his wand.
The one I recognized as Alastor Gumboil turned to me.

“Sirius Black III has been convicted of murdering Peter Pettigrew, twelve muggles, and is also being convicted of being an accessory to murder against James and Lilly Potter.” He sneered.

“What?” Sirius growled

“What? That’s absured.” I cried trying to reach out toward Sirius only to be held back by two of the other Hit Wizards.

“Sirius would never betray his friends!” I yelled.

“McNeil, Oscar. Take him away “ Gumboil ordered.

“NO!” I cried pulling against the others wizards arms. I managed to get through and launched myself at Sirius.

“I can’t lose you! I’ve lost our son and our best friends I can’t lose you too!” I cried into his shoulder. He placed his chin on my shoulder and held me in place as best he could with his hands cuffed behind him.

“You’ll never lose me Ella.” He kissed me on my cheek one more time.

Gumboil mumbled something before I was thrown away from Sirius and into the arms of the fourth awaiting Hit Wizard whose arms slithered around me waist and arms. I began to struggle only every time I moved his arms only tightened like a boa constrictor.

“Let her go! Let her go you bloody bastard!” Sirius growled as they pulled him out of the house. Tears flowed freely from my eyes as Gumboil waved his wand at the man and he dropped me. I fell to the floor as he walked out of the threshold. I crumpled to the floor and wrapped my arms around my knees and cried.

~*********~

“But he was also seen leaving James and Lily’s house that night” Remus said munching on the bread.

“I just don’t believe he did this! I’ve let everyone convince me he did but I just can’t convince my heart he did these things.” I whispered tears pinching my eyes.
Remus sighed placing his hand on mine “Sirius fooled all of us Ella. Betrayed us all. It isn’t your fault nor is it fair for you to blame yourself over his actions.”
I stood up gently pulling my hand from Remus’ and placing enough money and the table before leaving.

“Ella!” Remus called I ignored him and maneuvered through the crowd to the door once outside. I concentrated on a place I could be happy. I didn’t care where it was just a place away from Remus at the moment where I could think.

I felt myself being forced through the small tube before I landed on my feet outside the gates of Hogwarts and ran through entering the Dark forest. I saw a fallen log in front of me I picked up the speed and jumped up. Midair my hands morphed into grey paws with black patterns and the rest of my body was covered in soft grey fur my face forming feline features of my animagus a Snow Leopard].

My paws shifted through the snow with ease propelling me through the air at high speeds soon I ended up at the rocky edge of the lake. I morphed back breathing hair small tears pricking at my eyes as I settled on top of a rock and looked out at the frozen lake with Hogwarts silhouette reflecting off of the ice..