I'm Not a Monster, but Together We Can Live Forever

Sam got up and walked out of the room without even looking or speaking to me. I ignored it and just followed her out of the room. Brian was standing there and looked pissed. I sighed and started helping take boxes out to the moving truck. Everyone was down here besides Kris. That was weird she and Brian have been attached at the hip since we've been in Maryland.

"Uh. Who's hungry?" Sam asked everyone.

"Me." Everyone said together.

"I'll go get food. How about we leave the boys here to pack and all us girls go get the food?" Val asked.

"Sounds great." Jimmy smiled.

Sam walked up the stairs and went to get Kris. Once all the girls left we took a break.

"We should invite the girls on tour with us." Matt said.

"I'm cool with it." Berry smiled.

"I am too. I've missed my Sammi Bear." Jimmy admitted.

"So, is everyone cool with them coming on tour with us?" Jason asked.

We all nodded and finished putting everything into the moving truck, The house was almost completely empty. The only things still here were the mattresses and a stereo. Fun, right.

The girls walked into the house each holding two bags. And walked over and set them on the island. Kris smiled at me and turned the radio on. Misfits came on and we all sang along. No one sang on pitch besides Matt because he has a voice of a god or some shit like that. Once we were all done eating, Matt cleared his throat calling all eyes on him.

"I was wondering." Matt looked at Kris and Sam

"We. Don't forget we." Johnny corrected him.

"We were wondering if you guys wanted to come on the rest of the tour with us.on tour. And you can just stay with us for the rest of tour and go home when we do. That way you won't be bored." Jimmy said, Matt was taking to long.

"Seriously?" Kris asked.

"Of course." I smiled at her.

"Dude! That's fucking awesome!" Val screamed hugging them.

"We'd love to!" Kris said.

Val, Sam and Kris stood there acting like girls for a minute, screaming and jumping, before calming down and looking around the room.

"What about all of our stuff?" Sam asked.

"Let's sell it. Get new stuff when we get home." Kris suggested.

"I guess. We're not selling that damn flat screen though." Sam smiled.

"When does tour start up again, baby?" Val asked Matt.

"Two days." He told her.

Everyone was silent for a second. An awkward silence filled the room and everyone stood still. Something was up with Sam and Kris. Sam hasn't spoken to me all morning and since I've been awake neither have Kristina and Brian. Weird. I was trying not to let it get to me but it was really bothering me. I looked at Sam and she automatically looked away.

"Sam, can we uh talk?" I asked. She nodded and walked up the stairs to her room.

"What do you want Baker?" She hissed.

"What's wrong?" I asked trying to hug her but she pushed me away.

"Nothing. Just please don't touch me." She sighed.

"Why? What did I do? Sam, I'm begging don't be mad at me for what ever I did."

"You didn't do anything. I just don't want to be touched right now."

Talk about time of the month. Fuck what did I do. I wonder if I said anything to piss her off, I couldn't think of anything though. I smiled at her and she just walked away. Something was wrong I just didn't know what it was. Maybe Val knew? Or Kristina? Some one had to know what was wrong with her. She was acting weird.

I walked out front and sat on the porch to smoke a cigarette. I heard the screen door open and looked back to see Jimmy. He smiled at me before plopping down next to me.

"Sup?" I asked, blowing the smoke out of my mouth.

"What's wrong with Sammi?"

"Fuck, I don't know. Period, I guess?"

"She seems like somethings bothering her. Yesterday, she was like this too."

"I didn't notice it yesterday."

"I sure as hell did."

I took the last drag of my cigarette and put it out. Jimmy looked at me and frowned. I smiled at him and got up. I walked into the house and smiled at everyone. My phone vibrated from my pocket so I pulled it out and saw I had a text.. from Gena?

'wn u gt hme im gna drve u crz.'

I smirked and replied :

'hw u gna do tht, sexy?'

A few minutes I received a picture message. I opened it and saw it; She was naked. Under the picture it said :

'like this. i knw u wnt me.'

I sighed but replied.

'i cnt tlk. bye gena.'

I closed my phone and looked up at the group. I rubbed my neck and smiled acting like everything was all good; When in reality I felt bad for encouraging Gena, I felt like I was using Sam to make Gena jealous even though Sam and I haven't done anything. I couldn't grasp my thoughts, my head was spinning and kept going fast. The thoughts that have been pushed so deep down have risen and couldn't be pushed back down. I tried ignoring my thoughts - my feelings - but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't ignore what I was feeling.

I screamed before punching the wall, I pulled my fist from the hole I've just created and walked out the door letting it slam behind me. I walked for a good ten minutes before I was calm again. That's when I decided I needed to be honest with myself.

No more lying, you did this to yourself.

I thought to myself. I sat down on the curb a good mile away from Sam and Kris' house and let my thoughts run wild. Memories, flashbacks and pain came back as I thought about my past. The good times I've had with Sam were the only things I've cherished and kept to myself. No one knows what we did when we were alone; Nothing sexual, just talking. I thought about how bad I hurt her and the anger inside of me started coming back.

Calm down.

I told myself. I pushed off of the cement and started walking back towards the house. I walked in, everyone was sitting the, making no moves. Jaws wide open. I walked passed them and straight to the room and fell back on the bed. The door opened and the bed sank in next to me. I looked at her, her sparkling blue eyes, locked with mine and she smiled.

"Are you okay, Boo?" She asked and laid down next to me.

"I'm better now, sorry for the hole in the wall." I frowned.

"It's nothing. I've punched the wall a billion times. So has Kris."

"Sammi, I'm sorry for what ever I did that made you mad at me."

"You didn't do it. I've just been in a not so good mood since yesterday."

"What's wrong?"

"Let me guess, you think I'm on my period?"

"I didn't say that." I smiled.

"Oh my god! Z no, I'm not on my period. It's just something that happened at work a while back."

"Want to talk about it?"

"Just some harassment stuff. Nothing much."

"What? he harassed you?"

"Yep."

"And you didn't do anything?"

"Well he told me he'd fire me if I didn't fuck him. And when I refused, he hit me."

"I'm sorry. I should have been here to protect you."

"Let's go back downstairs."

I got up and waited for her to get up and we walked down stairs. The hole was all ready fixed. I smiled and erased the texts from Gena. I didn't love Gena; she was a substitute. I was so confused at this point, I had feelings for Sam but didn't know what those feelings meant. We are best friends and always have been but when she left something clicked inside of me telling me I'd be sorry for not stopping her. I was, terribly sorry. I watched her go with tear filled eyes and didn't try stopping her, what kind of friend was I?

"Baker? What's running through your mind?" Johnny asked.

"Nothing." I sighed.

Sam walked up to me and hugged me.

"You look like you need a hug." She told me.

"I did. Thanks Sam."

The rest of the night was pretty boring since we had nothing to do. I sat around trying to figure out what my feelings meant but nothing helped. Every time Sam walked by me I felt the hair on my arm stand up, my heart beat faster, my pulse rush through me.

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So.. what did you guys think? I sat here for almost an hour staring at this thinking how I could write this.. I figured it out.. We might write more in Brian's and Zack's POV but not sure yet :)