Retarded In Love

I never corrected Dunn. I don't know if I should have, but I didn't. I didn't know at the time if things would work out with Dico and I, but honestly... I was scared not to have someone. I'd had someone for years, and then out of nowhere; I was alone. So, it was my first reaction to cling to the first person who had slight interest, and it was either Dico or Steve-O... I rest my case.

After the reunion, I joined the crowd of people to listen to Jeff talk about the Human Bowling skit they were about to film. Dico must have heard the boyfriend comment, because he draped his arm around my shoulder. He was going to milk this for all it was worth, and as far as I was concerned, he could. At this point, anything to keep my mind off what had just happened was just fine with me.

After Jeff was done, Dico made his way up to the platform to announce the teams. I wasn't in this skit. I hadn't been in any I'd filmed that day, really. Just a short cameo and a short skirt. That's all I was. It made me mad. I hadn't come all this way for this. I didn't leave my life behind on short notice to hold hands with some wanna-be Johnny Knoxville. I watched Bam and Ryan push Preston into trashcans and couldn't help but laugh, but as soon as the cameras stopped rolling so they could reset the cans, I approached Jeff.

"Look, I hate to be a bitch about it, but I'd like to be more than a prop." I was not one to beat around the bush.

He looked at me, confused. "I know. It's the first day of shooting. Look, if you've got any ideas for stunts, or if there's a bit you want in on, don't hesitate to say so." He turned to face the ramp. "Are we set? Ok."

I walked away after that. I didn't want to deal with anyone. There was a truck parked not too far away. I walked over to it and sat on the tail gate. I felt terrible. The worst I had in my life so far. I was thousands of miles from home, surrounded by strangers who I had to constantly remind not to touch me, the love of my life had just left me and within an hour I had picked up someone new, who happened to be one of my dearest friends. I was confused. I was tired. I was angry, and happy, and sad, and confused. God, I was confused... I rested my elbows on my knees, and put my head in my hands.

I felt someone sit down beside me, lowering the tail gate slightly, then I heard the low raspy voice I recognized as Steve-O's. "Hey."

I turned my head, not lifting it from my hands. "What?"

"Hey, I just wanted to say sorry. For real this time. And about the cigarette, I didn't think it would hit you... That was a total accident, but I'll leave you alone now that I know you really have a boyfriend."

I laughed and lifted my head, looking down at the burn. "Dico's not my boyfriend."

"But Dunn..."

"Lied." I finished. I looked over at him. He was smirking... And wearing a cheetah-print spedo. I couldn't help but giggle.

"So, you're available?" He chuckled.

"Hmm... I guess so." With that, I jumped off the tail gate and made my to the river. Making sure to stay out of the shot, I took off my shoes, tank top, and Dico's hat, then waded into the water. I looked over at Dico, who was smiling at me, then I looked at Steve-O who was doing the same. I dove farther into the river laughing to myself. I'm going to make up for those four years...'