Be My Strength

"Where are we headed now?" Andy asked me after we are out from a small store dropping some eggs.

We are helping Maggie selling her goods that she produced from her farm. The neighborhood where Maggie lived is not so big and crowded. Everyone seems to know the good old lady Maggie, because when we're coming to their store telling them that we want to sell some goods to them, they refused in an instant. But after Andy explain to them that the goods are coming from Maggie's farm, they immediately change to a very nice person and started to buy a lot of things from us.

It's only three dozen of egg, five big bottles of milk and a lot of vegetables like carrot, potato, beetroot, spinach, and many more left. It is carried with a small red wooden kart pulling by Andy. He's acting like a little kid when Maggie asked us to help us and telling us we can use the kart to make us easier carried around the goods. Andy keep pushing and pulling the kart like it was a toy he never had when he was a kid. He sometimes makes stupid faces and raising his eyebrows. I found it cute even though it doesn't make any sense.

"Next is Williamson's Bakery. We're dropping him the rest of the eggs and also the milk" I answered him. "Maggie also said we should ask him if he wants to buy the veggies or no".

"Okay. Cool!" Andy nodded. "I'm getting tired pulling this kart all the way to the top of the hill" he glanced back and forth to the kart.

"No!" I snap his shoulder with the list of stores given by Maggie.

"What?" He frowned and making a very stupid face that makes me can't help not to giggle.

"I know you're after the milk! You can't have it, not until every single goods in the kart sold. We have to help Maggie, remember?"

"Alright, alright" and he go back pulling the kart until we reach Williamson's Bakery.

The bell tingling as we enter the store. There is a teenage boy, probably same age as Andy, cleaning up the windows and me. He looked at us when we're walking to the counter. I give him a smile but he ignored me back facing the window. A middle-age man shows up from behind the counter as he clean up his hands with a napkin.

"Can I help you?" He asked.

"We're from Margaret's Farm. We're delivering some eggs and milk that you order,” I explain.

"Oh you're from Maggie's. Come on come on just put it on the counter" he smiles as he ordered Andy, and he immediately put the goods one by one to the counter.

"Where's that little boy Lyle, who always helping her delivering the goods?" Mr. Williamson asked while keeping count to the eggs.

"Lyle is sick. He's got flu and have to take a rest, sir,” explained Andy.

"Oh! So you both are working for her now?" He asked me who just stand there doing nothing. "And you..." He looked at Andy now. "I think I've seen you around before"

"Uhm no... We're just..." I'm about to explain when...

"Stopping by" for the several times, Andy cut me again. "We're just tourists, and we stayed at Mrs. Margaret for a while. This morning she got news that Lyle is sick and she asked us if we could help her. That's all"

I nodded and smile at him. Though I don't understand why Andy doesn't just tell him that he's been here a few years ago. Andy shook my elbow and I give him a what's-wrong-look at him. His eyes widened to the memo.

"Oh! Mr. Williamson, do you also want to buy the vegetables? It's still fresh and maybe it can be ingredients for your new cake recipes?" I said as I grab some carrots and show it to him.

"It'll be nice. I take the rest of it" smile rose on my cheeks and I help Andy putting all the vegetables to the counter. "How much I supposed to pay you?"

I give him a note and he put his small rounded glasses before reading it. He takes it off and calls the boy who's cleaning up the windows. "Harry!" The boy looks at him, and walks toward us. "He's my son,” said Mr. Williamson. "Can you take all of these goods to the kitchen and please get my wallet when you back here"

The boy named Harry left to the kitchen from a door at the left side in the back of the counter and back with big basket. I am watching him putting the goods to the basket, while he also keep looking at Andy and I, and sometimes give us a suspicious look. Andy moved back and walking around the bakery try to avoiding Harry. After Harry is finish, he went back to the kitchen and not too long coming back with Mr. Williamson's wallet on his hand.

"Here you go, dear" he gives me the money. "You can take the change" and smile at me.

"No sir, I don't think I can take it. I'm just helping out" I give the money back to his hand.

"I insist young lady"

"But sir..."

"Thank you very much for your kindness sir. I think we have to go back to the farm now" Andy interrupted and took the money and put into his right side of his jeans pocket.

Andy took the kart and grabs my hand in an instant. I don't even have time to say thanked Mr. Williamson. We're out from the store and Andy walked faster down the hill with my hand still grab by his. I sometimes slip my feet because of the rock on the road that makes it not smooth.

"Andy you're hurting my wrist" I shook my hand but Andy doesn't pay attention. "Andy!" I snap my hand harder but it caused me fall to the road for losing my balance.

"Kels I'm sorry!" Andy stopped and immediately helps me get up on my feet again.

"What the hell is wrong with you? You know that Harry guy? He glared at you when he saw us" I asked him.

"It's none of your business" and then he walked away from me.

"Ok! One time you've become such a goofy and then change into an ignorant bastard. I just don't get you!" I look him in the eye; waiting for him to answer me but he just stand there and I can see his lips are frozen.

"It's nothing" he turned back and grabs the handle of the kart and start walking back to the farm.

"So you're ignoring me now. Okay I'm just going to go!" I walk away from him and don't want to turn around to see him.

"No wait! Kelsey!" I heard Andy drop the kart and run toward me.

He grabbed my wrist and makes me turn to face him. He gulped and his chest is rising up and down. He looked to the sky trying to calm him down.

"Please don't go..." He paused. "Please..." Andy looks so weak and his eyes gazing my eyes while he keep holding both of my hands. "Don't go..." His eyes started to get red for holding himself not to cry.

I don't know what's going on in his mind right now. But seeing him like that make my heartache and I can't help myself not to hug him. I wrap my arms across him and he buried his face on the right side of my shoulder. He's hugging me so tight like he'll never ever let me go.

***

We walked back to the farm and I wrap my left arm around his arm while sometimes patted his hand with my right hand. Andy occasionally squeezes my fingers with his fingers that linger around my left hand. Andy is calm and can control his breathing now. He look embarrassed for showing off his weak side in front of me, yet I still don't know why he doesn't want to let me go. Am I important for him? Or is it just because I look like Julie? There's a strange feeling going on in my chest when I remember about her name. Is this what you called jealousy? Do I like him? I feel awkward at this moment.

There were a lot of things going on in my mind. We keep walking side by side but silence is there between us until we reach the farm. Maggie sees and waved at us from the kitchen window. Andy put the kart back to the tool barn before he go back to the front door and walk in with me.

There's a delicious smell coming from the kitchen. Maggie come out as she clean her hands with her apron and gave Andy and I a hug.

"Where are the rest of the goods?" Maggie looked back and forth to me, and an empty space between the door and I.

"It's sold out!" I take out the money from my pocket and give it to her.

"Oh dear, thank you very much!" Maggie hugged me again and this time is tighter than before. She also patted Andy's back. "Come, grab some food. I make roast beef with mashed potato. It's already lunch time"

Maggie already walked back to her kitchen leaving me with Andy who suddenly doesn't say a word. That weird feeling is coming back to me. Does he regret anything? Why he doesn't talk? What's wrong between us now?

"Come on" but suddenly Andy break the silence and give me his hand. "Let's eat!" His signature smirk is rose on his cheek.

I take his hand. Maybe the negativity is just inside of my head. I have to let it go and not thinking about silly things until Andy finally tells me his story by himself.