Who We Are

"No talking, no sleeping, no texting, no listening to music. Only homework and boredom," the teacher said at the front desk as the after-school bed started ringing.

I bit my lip and looked around at the kids in the room with me before pulling out my homework and daring a glance at the clock on the wall, sighing when it had barely moved.

I started on science and pulled out my notebook to answer the questions on my study guide. I got about five questions in before my mind reverted back to lunch. The whole situation was a mess, and rumors of the fight were already creeping through the grapevine.

"Where'd you go?" Dean asked as I arrived back at the table with my things, my hands shoved down into my pockets, trying not to touch my mouth.

"To see my sister, " I said offhandedly. "She was having an issue."

"What kind of issue?" Emily asked suspiciously.

I rolled my eyes. "A Vanna Aaron kind of issue," I retorted, knowing that she'd hear enough about it through rumors. I didn't want to give her anything else to add to the mill.

Emily and I walked to gym together and got dressed in the crowded locker room. I was nervous as I pulled on my uniform and talked about Ethan Cartright with Emily, who was gushing about his dimples and curly brown hair. I avoided looking at any of the other girls in the locker room, and pretended that there was no one else in class. Even though they weren't, it felt like everyone was staring at me. I waited on edge for the moment they'd somehow find out about Ronnie kissing me. Rumors were bad enough, but now that he'd actually done it, I felt like I deserved the rumors.

"What's wrong?" Emily asked after class started.

I tugged on the edge of my shirt and looked around the gym. I sighed in relief when I didn't see Ronnie anywhere, and then I shrugged at Emily. "Nothing," I told her. "I'm just tired and thinking about how Gwendolyn will have to walk home alone tonight," I covered, honestly feeling worried about her walking alone though.

Emily nodded. "I'd offer her a ride but Nathaniel is picking me up today and we're going out for dinner," she said with a grin as she thought about her older brother who was now a big college boy.

"That's great," I told her. "What's the occasion?"

She just shrugged and offered a smile as she said, "I'm trying to convince him to let me meet this new girl he's been hanging out with at school."

"He just broke up with whats-her-face," I muttered. "He didn't mention anything about a new girl when I was over there. He definitely would've told me."

Emily frowned. "He's my brother. I think I'd know before you did."

Kat gave Emily an uncertain look that she didn't see. "Maybe he's not dating her," she suggested. "Maybe they're just hooking up?"

Emily looked looked horrified, but I wasn't sure if it was because we were talking about her brother or she was against the whole idea of sleeping around in general. We never talked about it, not in any real way. "Stop it, Katerina."

I just chuckled and nodded my head. I knew a lot more about Nathaniel's time than Emily did, even though she was his sister. He really hadn't mentioned anyone new to me, not so soon after his break-up, but even though we were close, I wasn't certain he'd talk about anything like that with me. Nate was pretty private about things like that. He never even went into detail about his girlfriend, and he definitely didn't bring them around.

I watched my feet as I walked to the section of the gym where'd we meet up with our class, and I looked up when Emily nudged me in the side with her elbow and whispered harshly. "Ronnie Radke is staring at you."

My gaze met his and our eyes locked. His brown eyes staring into my blue ones. He turned to Max when the rowdy boy called his name and slapped his shoulder.

I bit my lip and caught Emily's strange look as she asked, "What was that about?"

I shrugged. "It's probably all those rumors," I said. "They're making everything awkward."

Emily furrowed her eyebrows and asked, "Things weren't awkward before?"

I just shrugged as we jogged over to the spot where our teacher was and listened to him explain everything that we were going to be doing today. I couldn't help but glance behind me a couple times as he spoke, since Ronnie and Max were just a few feet behind me, talking about things I couldn't hear.

Any moment now it felt like someone would bring up the fight during lunch. I had no clue how both boys had slipped out of trouble. But the school was constant chaos; the teachers probably had enough to worry about.

"Everybody grab a racket and get into groups of two," the teacher said as he motioned to a large bucket filled with tennis rackets.

Emily and I paired up silently and moved to grab a couple of the rickety rackets before backing off so that everyone else could move in. My shoulder hit Max's as I turned around to move out of the way.

"Sorry," I said automatically, not looking up to the two of them as Emily grabbed my arm and yanked me away like my life depended on it.

"Katerina," Ronnie called, causing me to look to him automatically. He slid past the other kids and stood a little bit closer to me. "Can we talk?" he asked. "Please?" he added when he saw me start to shake my head.

"No."

"It'll only take a minute," he said, glancing over my shoulder to Emily who I'm sure was freaking out. I glanced back at my friend and caught a couple curious looks from other people. Ronnie never went out of his way to talk to anyone, not even his friends. He was an island that people sought out. Like always, he didn't seem to be aware of people paying attention to him.

"I can't," I said, shaking my head, "I've got to go." I turned around and followed Emily over to the court that we were assigned. I didn't look back as we joined up with another pair to play a scrimmage game of badminton.

"What was that?" Emily asked quickly as we walked to our side of the court, "and don't say 'nothing' because I know that's not true. I've been your best friend forever and Ronnie Radke has never said one word to you," she said, folding her arms over her chest and staring me in the eye, daring me to lie to her.

I sighed and shrugged, deciding that I had to tell her soon or risk her ignoring me again. "It's not a big deal," I prefaced, pushing my fingers through my hair even though it frizzed it out. "Do you want to come over after your dinner with Nate?" I asked.

Emily gave me a warning look. "You'll tell me everything?"

"Yeah, Em."

She bit her lip. "Can I pick you up and go back to my house?"

"No," I said, "I have to make dinner for the girls. I left them alone the other day to go to yours."

Emily sighed loudly and then shrugged. "Okay fine," she replied. "I'll have Nathaniel drop me off at yours."

"Okay, Em," I agreed.

Detention went by quickly, and when the after school bell rang I was already packing my things up and hurrying out of the door along with the fifteen other kids who'd been stuffed in one small room and forced to sit quietly.

I walked through the hallways, not paying any attention to the students who were still lingering around for other reason. I got to the front of the school and walked out of the building. I looked around for Colette's van since Emily was going to come over, and instead I saw Nathaniel's car parked by the curb out front. I hurried over and threw open the back door, letting myself fall into the seat as I greeted Emily and her brother.

"What are you doing here?" I asked Nate as he started up the vehicle. I couldn't help but grin at him.

He shrugged. "Emily seemed to think she was meeting some new girlfriend tonight," he said with a look that we'd shared countless times before. "Seeing as there is no new girlfriend, I figured I'd tag along on whatever the two of you are doing tonight. For old times sake."

"I told your sister you wouldn't be seeing someone already," I pointed out, crossing the sidewalk to him. "Where is she, anyway?"

"Car," he answered. "Pouting. She still wanted to go out for dinner."

I nodded knowingly and followed him to the car. Emily was in the front, but she seemed to be over her bought of sisterly dramatics. I grinned at her as I climbed in, shooting my eyes to Nathaniel to remind her of our conversation, and my suspicions, from earlier.

She simply glared and went back to being annoyed.

Within a few minutes, we were back at my house. I scanned the front quickly, hoping the Radkes weren't inside with my sisters. After today, I couldn't imagine that Ronnie would come around, but he did try to talk to me in gym, which was already outside of his norm.

"You're going to tell me, for real?" Emily asked before I had a chance to slide out of the car. She was glancing nervously towards the Radke house as she spoke and then looked back to me as I answered.

"Yeah," I told her, annoyed. "I said I would. Let's go." I walked around the car and led them towards the front door. I knocked a couple times and waited a moment for it to be pulled open by my youngest sister.

"Gianna," I groaned. "You're not allowed to answer the door," I told her as I lifted her up off of the ground. "You didn't even ask who it was."

"I looked out the window," she said with a shrug as she slid out of my grasp. She narrowed her blue eyes at Nate, too young to really know who he was, since we spent most of our time together at school and his house. She didn't bother to say hello before she raced up the stairs.

I slid off my shoes, balancing against the back of the couch were Lisette sat. "What are you doing?" I nodded toward the tv, where some show was zooming in on a map of some city.

She shrugged, not looking back. "Just watching TV."

The show kept zooming in until it turned into a street view and swapped over to a body camera. The police officer raised his gun at some guy. The guy went down on camera. "Turn that off," I told her. "You can't be watching stuff like that. You're crazy."

She sighed and grabbed the remote so she could hit the button. She practically rolled her eyes.

The TV went blank. "Thank you," I said, watching as Nate took the initiative and led his sister up the stairs to my room.

"I'm done with my homework," Lisette said as I was just about to ask, already pointing to the backpack that laid on the floor by the table in the kitchen.

I walked over to Lisette and pulled her to me, holding her in a tight hug as she whined and said she wanted to get something to drink. "Just hold on a minute," I demanded of my most serious sister, folding her to break free from my grasp.

She slipped my hold, and tried to dart away when I grabbed for her again. She stood stoically when I smacked a kiss into her hair. She scrambled away, darting for the kitchen.

For a moment I thought about starting dinner and leaving Emily and Nate upstairs, but I knew Em would come looking, and I didn't want her questioning me in front of my sisters. I stomped up the stairs like a child, unsure about what I would tell her. Unsure about what had even happened today.