You Can Fight Fate, You Just End Up Losing

I went up to my room and sat on the bed, my back against the headboard. I could very well be the sole owner of the Pittsburgh Penguins in a couple of years. I could be Tanners boss but then again I could be Kraus’ boss. I smiled at the thought. Women don’t typically own hockey teams. But I’m a Crosby damn it! Hockey is in my blood! I could do this, with help of course, I could do this.

It’s been a long day, with me staying mostly to myself. Venturing out of my room for lunch and to get a drink occasionally. I had a lot to consider.

I didn’t know how long it had actually taken me to run through every possible scenario, but I was jolted from my train of thought when my phone rang.

“Hello” I answered.

“Did I wake you?” Tanner asked sounding tired.

“No actually you didn’t” I answered with a smile. “Are you alright?”

“Yea just missing you, and getting tired . . .”

“How much further to Chicago?”

“About an hour.”

“You can always crash at my place. You have a spare key. I’d rather you stay there than keep driving if you’re tired Tan.”

“I just might take you up on that offer” he said with a soft sigh.

“I miss you a little too much already.”

“Same here Addie.”

“Traffic must be good if you’re that close to Chicago.”

“It’s pretty good. But still a long drive.”

“I have something I kind of need to talk to you about. I’m not sure what you’re going to think . . .” I said thinking that maybe his opinion on the team would help me.

“Oh? What is it? Why aren’t you sure what I’ll think?”

“Well it might involve you. . .” Maybe I shouldn’t.

“Addie what is it?”

“I’ve been thinking about something” I said stalling to give myself time to come up with anything else.

“And?”

“I want to try Tan” I blurted out.

“Try what?”

“Tanner, something we’ve been waiting for, something you thought that I had done a long time ago. . .”

“What? Really Addie? You tell me this when I’m gone!”

“Sorry” I smiled, I really do want to be with Tanner intimately. And I had been thinking about it for a while now.

“Don’t be, damn. Why did I have to head back to Madison?”

“Some crap about practice.”

“That’s right. Adds are you sure?”

“Yea, I am.”

“Son of a bitch . . .”

“What!”

“Not you baby, I almost drove off the road” he laughed.

“Not funny. I’m not laughing” I said trying to fight back a smile.

“Come on it’s a little funny.”

“Oh?”

“Yea, and honestly I’m glad to hear it. I just don’t want there to be all this pressure the next time we see each other.”

“Me either. I just think we should be prepared . . .”

“Ok” he said taking a deep breath. “I agree we should be prepared. But aren’t you on the pill already?”

“Yea but Tanner, I hate to ask, but . . .”

“What Adds?” he asked softly.

“I don’t know, nor do I really want to know, how many girls you’ve been with, but I have to know that you’ve been tested” I said in a hurried mess. I had thought about this before, I just didn’t think we’d be having this conversation over the phone.

“Addie, I got tested right after Halloween. When we decided to give this a try. I didn’t want to unintentionally pass something off to you.”

“Oh.”

“I’m clean Addie.”

“Ok.”

“You sound relieved.”

“I am, in the sense that I’m glad you’re ok.”

“Oh.”

“Now you sound relieved.”

“I am. I love you Addison.”

“I love you too Tanner.”

“Are you sure that I can crash at your place in Chicago?”

“Tanner, I offered. Please stay there, rest. I don’t want you to fall asleep while driving.”

“Thank you Adds.”

“Tan I want you to be safe, if something were to happen to you . . .”

“Same here Addie. I don’t know what I would do if something happened to you. The past 2 months have been amazing. I love spending every minute of my day with you. Honestly I’m bummed it took so long to realize it.”

“I know. You probably would have screwed things up though if we would have gotten together sooner. . . “ I laughed.

“You’re right.”

“I always am right.”

“Yea, yea” he scoffed. “I love it though. My girl is smart.”

“Damn straight.”

“You can do anything you set your mind to Adds. I believe that whole heartedly. You’re a good kind decent person, who is loyal to her family and friends. You make sure everyone has what they need and then some. And I love that about you. Always have.”

“Gee Tan, you’re making me blush.”

“Damn, I wish I could see that.”

“I’m sure it will happen again. No worries” I laughed.

“I love that sound.”

“What sound?”

“Your laugh.”

“You really are sleepy aren’t you?”

“Yes, but that doesn’t change the fact that I love your laugh.”

“Tanner, You’re amazing” I cooed. “I love you so much. I can’t wait to see you in a couple days.”

“I can’t wait to see you either.”