When All Else Fails

I never understood the logic of getting drunk to the point where you can’t even tell which of your leg is which. I mean, yeah, it can make you forget your problems… but only for a little while. After that, you get nothing but a massive headache and probably something you’d regret in the morning.

But right now, I couldn’t even give two shits about it.

He rejected me. Again. I was practically throwing myself on him but all he does is push me away! Not only does it make me look pathetic, but what a way to make my self-confidence crash and burn into pieces too. I’m so sick and tired of going through the same shit on every different day. This may sound whore-y and selfish but, I have needs too!

My nose scrunched up as I swallowed down my last shot for the night before standing on my feet, stumbling for a little bit. I stood there for a good minute before deciding I can walk close to properly now. When I finally got out of the bar, fresh instantly hit my entire body and I almost felt better. Almost.

I had some trouble getting my phone from the pocket of my skin-tight dress. But the moment I got it, I immediately called Taylor. I was this close to hanging up when I heard a groan from the other line. “Why are you calling at such an ungodly hour?”

I brought my hand to my temples, hoping the head ache would at least go away for a little bit. “Stop talking so loud, you’re hurting my head.” She sighed and I could almost hear her shake her head, if that was possible.

“I’m not picking you up. I’m sorry; I’ll make it up to you tomorrow. I really am sorry. Bye.” She quickly said and immediately hung up. I bit back my urge to scream, not wanting to attract attention from people walking down the street.

After what felt like an eternity, I finally got a cab. After a few minutes of just sitting there with the windows rolled down, I sobered up a bit. My head doesn’t feel like hell anymore but I still feel a bit tipsy.

I was close to drifting off to a nap, I felt the vehicle stop. I looked around for any sign or what may be the cause of why he stopped, but found nothing. Until I felt someone occupy the space next to me. The heavy scent of alcohol instantly hit my nostrils and I felt like I would puke out the window right there and then.

“W-who is this? Why is he…” I trailed down, hoping the cab driver would get the point. He gave me an apologetic look. “He looked like he needed a ride. I didn’t have the heart or conscience to just leave him there. Same reason why I stopped for you.”

I suddenly felt bad. “Thank you, then. You’re a very good person.” I gave him a smile which he returned.

I turned my attention back to the houses we passed by when I heard the guy next to me talk. “Hi.”

I moved my gaze towards him, studying his messy yet undeniably attractive features. He had dirty blonde hair that was sticking up in a thousand directions. His eyelids were droopy and underneath those were beautiful green eyes. He had a smirked plastered on his face. The first two buttons of his flannel were messily undone and he was wearing skinny jeans that almost seemed too tight for him.

“Hi.” I finally replied.

It’s his turn to study my appearance now. I can feel his gaze on me. I suddenly felt conscious of what I looked like. I looked down at my dress. The neck line was about an inch below my neck and it was sleeveless. It fell down right above my knees so it wasn’t really revealing. It’s what I normally wear when I go out for a drink since I don’t plan on getting raped during my drunken state. I don’t really know what other people think about it, nor do I care.

He put his hand out in front of me. “John” He said. “John O’Callaghan” He repeated, now including his last name as if I would instantly know who he was if he told me his last name.

I hesitantly took his hand before shaking it. He raised an eyebrow and I returned the gesture. He finally let go of my hand and laughed. “Last time I checked, both people should introduce themselves during these kinds of things. Whatever this is.” He moved his lanky arms around us, trying to emphasize the ‘whatever this is’ part.

I smirked. “Lewis,”

His brows furrowed. “Your name’s Lewis?”

I smiled. “It’s my last name.” His mouth formed an ‘o’ shape. “Well, that’s your first name then?” He pressed. I just gave him a smile, hoping he’d get the hint that I’m not going to tell him.

Thankfully, he got it and nodded his head. But he just won’t stop talking. “So, what brings you here?”

“Same reason you’re here. Mister cab driver is too nice to leave people like us, people who’s drunk off their asses.”

He chuckled. “N-no. I meant here. Like in New York!”

“I live here.” I replied simply. “Oh,” He started “You like it here?”

I shrugged. “It’s okay. I’d rather be in Ohio, though. I think I’m growing tired of this place. I feel like I already know every street here.” I admitted. Just thinking about moving there makes me smile. Ever since the day we visited Ohio, I adored the place. It’s much peaceful compared to New York. It’s true what they say, this city never sleeps.

He was about to say something when his something caught his attention. He kneeled on the seat with him facing the back of the cab. “Holy shit we just passed my hotel!”

The cab driver quickly stopped the vehicle. He was about the turn the cab around but John stopped him. “It’s fine, I can walk from here. Thank you, mister cab driverrr.” He slurred a bit in the end. The cab driver nodded and smiled.

He opened his side of the door, slowly putting his legs out of the car. When he entirely got out of the cab he just stood there for a while. The cab started moving again but my gaze never left him. He stumbled down the street, leaning on the something after every few steps.

I let out a loud sigh. “I think I can go from here.” The cab driver cocked an eyebrow. “I’m gonna help him get to his hotel. And hopefully, crash there. From the looks of it, he won’t even get to his place without breaking any part of his body.”

He nodded his head. I paid him and muttered a ‘thank you’ before exiting the cab.

I can see John attempting to get up from the ground. He supported his weight on a wall, trying to get up on his feet. I shook my head before walking faster to get near him before his causes any damage.

“Hi.”

He seems startled, until his eyes moved to my figure. “What are you doing here?” He asked, confused.

“To help you.”

He slowly nodded his head. I held my hand out for him and he gladly took it. He stood up from the ground, holding my hand tight for support. When he successfully lifted himself from the ground, I brought his arm around my shoulder and we started staggering to the hotel.

After a few buildings, we finally reached his hotel. It was actually quite fancy, so I really felt like we were making a scene. We tried our best to fasten our pace and enter the elevator. He pressed the button to the 24th floor and we waited patiently, not exchanging words at all.

When the elevator finally opened, he took the lead and headed to his hotel room.

As soon as I set foot in his place, the strong smell of alcohol. My nose scrunched up in disgust and I watched him throw his body on the couch, not caring that he was lying on a pile of dirty clothes. I approached him, trying not to step on the empty cans on the floor.

“You’re not planning to change clothes?”

He shook his head.

“Uh, not even sleep on your bed?”

Again, he declined.

I sighed heavily. I debated on whether to stay or go home. I took my phone out of my pocket and saw two text messages and a missed call. One of the messages was from Taylor and the remaining text and call was from Ian.

I first read Taylor’s, ”I’m really sorry, Ands. I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” I sent a short reply about crashing at John’s house and not to worry then I opened Ian’s text.

”Where are you? I just got home from work, I want to cuddle with you right now.”

“Hell no.” I said out loud with a roll of my eyes. I didn’t bother to reply and I shut my phone off. I made my way to what looks like his kitchen, leaving him there. I opened the fridge to hopefully find an unopened can of beer. Luckily, the fridge consisted of nothing but cans of beer.

A smile crept its way to my lips as I grabbed two cans and sat on the counter. I opened the first can and gulped half of its contents down. Next thing I knew, I already finished the second can and grabbed two more cans from the fridge. After that, I lost count of how many I’ve drank.

My head started spinning once again, probably worse than how much my head hurt when I was in the bar. I managed to bring myself to what I suppose is his room. Without bothering to turn the lights on, I entered the bathroom and emptied the can I was holding before throwing it in the tub.

I heard a groan from the tub, possibly because I hit him with the can. I approached it, only to find John now lying there, still wearing his clothes minus his shirt which appears to be on the bathroom floor.

“What the fuck are you doing there?” I asked. He got out of the tub after throwing the can away from him. “Trying to sleep.” He muttered. “Are you aware that you have a bed?”

“Yes, I am. I just don’t want to run to the bathroom to puke the shit out of myself tomorrow morning.”

“Well, that makes sense.” I admitted. He only shrugged and headed for the door. “Where ‘ya going?” I called out to him. “To drink some more.” He yelled back in reply.

Against my better judgment, I followed him out to the kitchen. He already started drinking a can when I got there. He threw me a can, and I surprisingly caught it with both hands.

And from there, we just started drinking the shit out of ourselves.

“So, why did you get yourself drunk tonight? And you’re alone nonetheless.” John asked. I shrugged. “Apparently, my boyfriend for 2 years won’t even go to second base with me.” I replied flatly.

He smirked at my straight forwardness but only nodded his head and carried on drinking. “What about you? Why did you get yourself so drunk you had to share a cab?”

“My girlfriend since God knows when seems to be cheating on me while I’m on tour and we kinda broke up.”

“Oh,” I started, speechless. “I’m sorry”

“It’s not your fault. It’s not anyone’s but mine. She wouldn’t have cheated on me if I was there for her when she needed me. She wouldn’t have sucked a dick that wasn’t mine if I was good enough for her!”

I bit my lip and toyed with the bracelets on my wrist, feeling suddenly awkward. “As cliché as it sounds… maybe it’s her, not you. She may be suffering from an odd sexual disorder or shit, you know? I don’t know. I just… fuck her.” I tripped over my words. He chuckled. “I already did. Apparently, another guy did too. Excellent.”

“Hey, don’t be too hard on yourself. And you said you’ve been together with since God know when so, you must be a good boyfriend since she stayed for so long. You’re not bad to look at either and from the looks of it, you’d do pretty great in bed. Maybe she just got lonely and… yeah.”

His infamous smirk appeared on his lips once again. “Did you just say I’m attractive and looks like I do great in bed?”

My jaw dropped open as I realized what I just said. “I, I mean-” I started rambling. He put down the can of beer on the counter and approached me slowly until he was close enough that I could feel his hot breath on my skin, sending goose bumps all over me. He had an arm leaning on the wall on each of my sides, trapping me. “Do you want to find out?”

“W-what?” I croaked.

He moved his face closer to mine, “Do you want to find out if I do great in bed?” He repeated, his voice raspier this time. I opened my mouth for an answer but he instantly shut it by crashing his lips with mine.

He caught me off guard but I responded immediately by wrapping my arms around his neck. He detached his hands from the wall and moved them to my lower back and pulled me closer to him, entirely closing the space between us.

We exited the kitchen and went back to his bedroom, never parting from each other. When the back of my knees hit the mattress, both our bodies collapsed on the bed. He crawled on top of me, leaving kisses on every inch of my exposed skin.

He started nipping at my neck which made me throw my head back, giving him more access. When he reached my collarbone, I can’t help but to moan. I felt him smirk against my skin, which I noticed he’s been doing lately, knowing he just found my spot.

He kept on nipping and biting there until he made sure he made his mark before connecting his lips with mine again. My fingers got lost in his hair while his hands were firm on my waist. My dress had ridden up all the way to my stomach, exposing my lacy underwear. I grinded my hips against his, making him groan in my mouth. “Stop turning me on.” I managed to say.

He hovered his lips over the exposed skin near my collarbone, then flicked his tongue on it. “Like this?” He said huskily. I only moaned louder. In my drunken state, my hormones were raging and he just added fuel to the fire. His hands slowly lifted the dress of my body and then threw it somewhere on his bedroom floor. He moved to my stomach then between my breasts.

He quickly undid the clasp of my bra and before I knew it, it was off of me and on the floor along with my dress. He cupped one breast with his hand sucked on the other. He did the same with the other breast and I felt breathing get heavy.

He left a trail of kisses from my hip bones until he reached my inner thighs. He started playing with the lace of my underwear and slowly slid it down my legs.

My back arched and I gasped when I felt his tongue on me. My fingers were tangled in his dirty blonde hair as he did his dirty work, my uneven breathing and small moans filled the small room.

When I couldn’t take it anymore, I sat up and grabbed his face. I kissed him rougher than I’ve ever kissed anyone, even Ian, not caring that I could taste myself in his mouth.

I pinned him down, straddling his waist. I pulled away and smiled seductively. “My turn.”

My hands went down to his chest and toned stomach until I reached his belt. I slowly undid it and unbuttoned his pants. If I wasn’t so horny and turned on at the moment, I would have laughed at him since he had to wiggle his legs and it was a bit difficult to get his skin-tight jeans off of him.

I felt him through the fabric, earning a groan from him, before grazing my fingers on the waistband of his boxers and pulling them down to his ankles. He kicked them off and I quickly started pumping him up.

I ghosted my lips over his tip, teasing him a little, before licking it and taking him in my mouth. I looked up at him every once in a while, and our eyes were filled with lust the entire time.

He rolled us over and instantly positioned himself on top of me. We gasped in unison the moment the gap between us was sealed. He kept his pace slow at first but started to gain speed when I told him to do so.

“John, ohhh” I moaned out loud. He grunted in response, his movement getting quicker with every trust.

We screamed each other’s name, my last name in his case, and moaned like our lives depended on it. Our skin felt hot, we were both flustered and drenched in sweat when we both came. He collapsed beside me, our labored breathing the only sound to be heard.

None of us dared to say a word, fearing we might instantly sober up and regret this.

He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer, our naked bodies pressed against each other under the brown sheets.

I million thoughts were running through my head but I pushed them all in the back of my mind. I tried to enjoy this moment. I took in how he felt on my skin, how peaceful this moment was.

Because I know how I’d react in the morning and boy, did I fuck things up.