It Should've Been Me Instead Of Him

Julie.

I just followed John’s footsteps, we were walking to go home and John walked in front of me, leaving me behind him. I just stared at his back. Suddenly, I bumped something in front of me and fell on the ground.

“Awww!” I screamed and John reflexively turned back, seeing me fall down to the ground.

“Are you okay?” He worried as he helped me to stand up but I couldn’t. “Let me carry you.”

John carried me home and then he laid me down on my bed. I felt better now. John was about to leave my bedroom but I interrupted.

“Umm.. John?” I murmured.

“Yeah?”

“You may go home if you want to. I feel better now. Thank you.” I said as I smiled.

“I won’t leave you alone. I’ll stay on the couch. Call me if you need something.” He said care less before leaving me alone in my bedroom.

I hadn’t slept yet since 2 hours ago John left me alone. I just wondered why John looked weird, why he looked careless with everything, but he helped me last night, what actually happened to him. I was just curious.



I woke up at 7 AM. I took a bath and got dressed. I went downstairs and found John was asleep on the couch. He shivered and I rushed to wrap his body with a blanket. I immediately made my way to the kitchen, intending to cook something for our breakfast.

I heard footsteps and I knew it was John’s. He went upstairs and then I heard him yelling, “JULIE!” I shocked then rushed my steps to reach my bedroom and I found John there.

“What happened, John?” asked me in confusion.

“Julie?! Where did you go?!” he hollered as he ran toward me and hugged me tightly. As he realized that he hugged me, he blushed. “Oh, Sorry.”

“No worries.” I smiled. “I just cooked at the kitchen, you know.”

“Luckily you aren't kidnapped.” He sighed as we smelt something wrong at the kitchen, our breakfast broke.



Monday morning. It meant I should go to college. My new campus. I prepared everything for my first day till everything was ready. I was waiting for Alex to drop me off to campus but there was no Alex. I walked over to his bedroom and I found him still sleeping on his bed. He was oversleeping. He didn't even wake up when I pinched his arm but he got up immediately as I watered his face, like he did.

My campus was far enough from Alex’s house so we could talk a little when we were on the car.

“How was John?” asked me curiously.

“How was John?” Alex repeated in confusion.

“Don’t repeat. Just answer, please.”

“How could I answer your question if I didn’t understand what did you mean?”

“Huh? What happened to John? He seemed..”

“Weird, careless, unfriendly?” Alex cut my words as he chuckled.

“Yeah, what happened to him?”

“Do you like him?” Alex laughed. “You know what? It's just about his past. In the past, he was friendly, and a little talkative.”

“I just wanna know, you know? I don't even think of it." I rolled my eyes. "Tell me about his past.” Requested me.

“It was because of a girl whom was similar to you.” Alex murmured as he changed his expression.

“Similar to me?” asked me curiously.

“Yeah,” Alex sighed. “John had a girlfriend named Becky. She was everything for John. She brighten up John’s world with her love. She was beautiful, smart, and friendly. She really was similar to you, sweetie.. They had been dating since they were in high school until they were graduated from college. They were the best couple ever! And they had decided to get engaged, but...”

“But what?”

“Becky had a car crash a day before their engagement celebration. She had passed away. Made John’s life dark.”

I shocked when I knew what actually happened to John. There was a reason behind his weird attitude.



Once we arrived at campus, Alex gave me “good luck!” which made me have a little bit of spirit. But I still thought about John’s miserable. Apparently it also made me hurt. Alex’s words when we were on the car was flying in my mind and made me not focus. I bumped someone whom was walking in front of me until all his stuffs fell on the ground.

“Sorry, I unintentionally bumped you. I just didn’t see you.” I looked down, feeling guilty.

“Oh yeah, no problem. It’s okay, it’s also my fault.” He smiled at me.

“What if I treat you a breakfast or lunch to pay my fault?” I offered.

“No need to, I’ve said it was also my fault.”

“Oh please, I feel guilty on you.” Begged me.

“Okay, I prefer lunch. See you in the canteen at 12.”

After that accident, I found someone whom looked like a teacher so I intended to ask her. She told me to meet the principal. I talked some with the principal, Mr. Phillip before passing the first class with French as the lesson for 3 hours, then continued by History. They ended at 11.45. It means I could treat the boy whom I hit this morning, paying my promise.



“Hey!” I greeted him as he smiled at me.

“Have you been waiting for long time?” asked him.

“No, I haven’t. I just arrived a few minutes ago. Oh yeah, let’s order your meals.” Offered me.

“That should be me.” He chuckled.

“Oh no problem, I just wanna pay my promise this morning.” I smiled.

“No matter. Umm.. What’s your name? I’m Cameron.”

“I’m Julie.” We shook hand and then ordered our meals.



Cameron took me home and I introduced him as my new friend to Alex. I told that we met because I bumped Cameron and we had been friends. We were giggling together in the living room while John was coming from outside. He showed his “no-expression” face and I introduced Cameron to John. Cameron smiled and John just showed his flat smile. I swore I hated his flat smile.

John stayed with Alex and me for a while. Besides John stayed alone in his own house, Alex said that they would made some songs. Alex and John were musicians, but I didn’t even know what they actually do.

John.

I felt something weird with my heart when I came home. I found Alex and Julie in the living room, they were giggling with a stranger. Julie introduced him as her new friend, Cameron. I just didn’t like him though he seemed kind and friendly. I didn’t know why. Was I jealous?

Since Becky gone, I always felt empty and careless with everything around me, including girls. But when I met Julie, I felt something different. She could make me a little bit nervous if she was around. She was similar to Becky. She was beautiful, smart, and friendly. She was adorable. I always wanted to hug and kiss her, but I couldn’t. She wasn’t Becky, she was Julie. And I love Becky, I didn’t love Julie.