Twisted Symphony

“She broke my phone.” I mumbled into the front desk phone. I could feel the security guard analyzing me.

“What?” His voice turned to confusion.

“She found out and she broke my phone. She threw a picture frame at me, and there’s a dent in my bathroom door.

“Where are you?” I could hear him moving around.”Gabrielle?”

“I’m at the front desk. I-I have no phone.” I looked down at my attire. At least I had a pair of yoga pants and a tank top on. I grabbed a pink zip-up before I left the room. My hair was still wet from my shower, and all I had was the ten dollars I found in my pocket.

“Can you go back to your room.”

“She’s trying to kill me, Johnnie.” I said lowly.

“Why don’t you tell the front desk?” I heard ore rustling around.

“You know the rules. They don’t just separate you like in college; they’ll evaluate us both and send one of us home.”

“I’m catching the 7:57. My train comes into Penn around 10:40, so I should be there by eleven.”

“Stop, you don’t have to babysit me. Stay there. I’ll figure something out, I just didn’t want you to freak out when I wasn’t answering my phone.” He had been packing, that was the noise.

“ Hold on a sec. Francesca, drive me to the train station?” I heard him raise the question.

“Everything okay?” She asked.

“Yeah. I just want to head back. It was a mistake coming. I’ve only got two and a half weeks left with her, and I just want to-” I listen as he tries to put his hand over the receiver. The sound goes down a notch, but I can still hear him.

“Johnnie!” I heard her squeak.

“Stop.” He said calmly.

“Do you love her? I mean I know it’s too early to tell but-

“Shut up!” He snapped back.

“Of course I’ll drive you! Get in the car!” She was ecstatic.

“Hey, Sorry. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

“You don’t have to. I can take care of myself.” I gave it one more try.

“I know. It’s not about that. I’ll see you in a couple hours.” I felt this stupid smile creep onto my face.

“Fine. Then, I’ll be at Penn.”

“You don’t have to do that.” I knew that too.

“I know.”

__ ___ ___ ___ __

I’ve been watching the boards change in Penn station for over fifteen minutes. It’s 10:37 and my eyes are jerking around for any sight of him. I didn’t really understand Penn Station, I hadn’t really been there before. It took me four seconds to spot him walking down the train terminal. His skin had taken more sun in the past four days, and his hair seemed lighter than before. A black duffle bag was slung over his shoulder, and the white t-shirt made his skin illuminate. Even in the underground light, but don’t ask me, I’m biased. He hadn’t seen me yet, but before I could even realize it, I was moving towards him. I watched as his face lit up when I came into view.

“I missed you.” I hooked my arms around his neck, and he latched onto my waist. “I missed you so much, and I’m sorry.” I felt my face sinking into his chest and I knew we were in front of hundreds of people, but I didn’t want to let go.

“I missed you too.” I felt his grip on me grow stronger. “I’m sorry I even freaked out. I should’ve just talked to you about it.”

“I shouldn’t have pushed you like I did.”

“Gabrielle, I don’t even care.” He smiled and I leaned up to kiss him on the lips.

“Let’s go.” I laced my fingers into his.

I still hadn’t figured out where I was going to sleep for the night. I knew it wasn’t in Johnnie’s room as he sat up in his bed, and I laid in his lap. We had only been back for fifteen minutes, and we hadn’t said much, but neither of us cared. I enjoyed his company, and he enjoyed mine; a poorly acted Mathew McConaughey movie playing on the television.

“Where’s your roommate?” I looked up at him.

“He’ll be back at one or two in the morning.” He shrugged. “He’s a chill guy.”

“I need to go to the apple store tomorrow.” I held up my shattered phone. The back was disconnected from the front and both sides were totally shattered.

“Holy crap.” His eyes went wide. “We’ll go tomorrow.” He took the phone from my hands and examined it. “What exactly happened?”

“Well I was in the shower and I came out, and she had my phone. She went through my phone while I was in the shower. She was playing back your voicemails. Her face turned red, she was crying and then she started screaming all this stuff… I felt kind of horrible for her, but then she threw my phone at my head, and my picture frame.”

“Was it bad?” How could he even ask that?

“I felt like I was trapped in a room with the exorcist. I tried to be reasonable, but she wouldn’t listen. I get what she means, she asked me to stay away from you.” I felt the knot of guilt twist in my stomach.

“Well I went after you. You did not go after me, as I remember it.” He smiled.

“We hurt her so bad, Johnnie.” I felt my face giving me away.

“Are you upset with yourself?” His face took on a somber look.

“Yeah.” I looked up at him. “I mean, what if it were me? I promised. And I know she’s messed up and all, but we’re all sort of messed up. I really didn’t consider how much she cares. I feel like I messed things up for you and her, and I’ll be all the way in Illinois. I don’t even think it was about her, she’s not why I’m upset, but I’m just not where I expected myself to be right now.”

“I didn’t mean to mess things up. If someone told me that when I met you I’d be taking you home to meet my parents I’d tell them that they were stoned. And I know I sound like a selfish asshole, but Kayla will never change. I haven’t expressed the slightest interest in over a month, and she won’t stop. And if I had to choose between the both of you, I’d choose you. Even if you don’t want us after the summer, I’d still choose you.” I watched as his cheeks grew red, He never blushed. “I’d choose you every time.” He looked away from me.

“That’s sweet.” I touched his face and he moved down to meet my lips.

“You don’t believe me.” He pulled his lips away from mine.

“Hey, I wasn’t done.” I sat up and laid my legs across his lap, my back against the wall.

“You don’t believe me.” He repeated. “You always say, ‘that’s sweet’ when you don’t believe me.”

“Johnnie.” I moved towards him to give him a kiss.

“Do you?” He shrugged back from me.

“We’re young, Johnnie. We feel a lot of things.”

“Can you be seventeen for five seconds?” He snapped.

“I can’t! I can’t! My sister acted her age, and look where she ended up. I acted my age and I have nowhere to sleep tonight!” I felt tears begin to roll don my cheeks. “Shit.” I couldn’t stop them. I rubbed at my eyes roughly.

“Hey- hey, it’s okay.” He pulled me closer to him and I felt myself tense up. I felt my tears dampening his t-shirt. “We push each other, that’s what we do.” He rested his chin on the top of my head.

“My life is completely different when I’m not here, Johnnie.” I lifted my head away from his chest. “My sister is pregnant, and my Dad hates me. My mother is putting me on birth control even though I’m not even having sex, I have work, and AP classes. She’s due in October, and I’ll be babysitting at least three nights a week. My sister is going to go to school in the daytime, and work at night. My mom is going to be working double shifts for the rest of my life, and I have to drive three hours to Chicago every other Saturday to work with this piano instructor who’s suppose to be one of the best in the country. I don’t even know when I’m going to have time to do my homework, and I’ll never have the money to come see you.” Everything was on the table, I had nothing left to tell.

“I don’t care.” He shrugged.

“You’re asking to run into a burning building .” I wiped at my cheeks.

“Fine, whatever. I don’t care.” He brushed my hair behind my ears.

“Seriously?” I raised an eyebrow.

“Are you in the burning building?” He began to play with my fingers in his lap.

“Yes.” I nodded.

“Then I’m there.” There was no doubt in his voice.

“Okay.” I nodded.

“Okay.” He smiled victoriously, trying to be modest.

“I gave you an out.” I leaned my forehead against his.

“I don’t want it.” He kissed me softly on the lips.

“I don’t expect you to stick around.” I bit at my bottom lip.

“I know.” He kissed me once more.

I didn’t understand.