You're Such a Gorgeous Nightmare

Moments after finishing paying my traffic ticket, my phone rang. It was Bryan. Hmm. Wonder what he wanted.

"Hey Bryan!" I answered.

"Ronnie, I need you to listen. Brii - I think she... I think she's trying to kill herself."

I was in shock. But part of me saw that this was coming. I blamed myself. "What do you mean, she's trying to kill herself?" I asked, tears rolling down my cheeks.

"Ronnie, Craig and I found her in her room. We thought she was sleeping but -"

I was sobbing, now. "It's all my fault. I told her I was coming over and then I got pulled over, I got a ticket. I... I... Oh my god."

"She took a whole bottle of sleeping pills, Ronnie. It isn't your fault. You didn't know you were going to get pulled over. You didn't know she was going to do it."

Well, I sort of did.

"Oh my god. I can't do this. Please tell me you're lying," I begged. Please. PLEASE.

"I wish I could. I can't."

"Alright, I'll be there soon."

I got into my car. I really couldn't think about this. It was my fault. If she died, I'd have to live with that for the rest of my life. I wouldn't be able to. My phone rang again. I really, really didn't want to deal with this. It was Bryan. I had to deal with it.

"Hello..."

"Ronnie. It's Craig. Bryan wanted me to call and tell you to meet us at the hospital. The ambulance is almost here."

"Thanks. I... I really have to go now." I hung up the phone and drove like a madman, fighting a nervous breakdown. It was a miracle that I didn't get another ticket. No matter how many times I told myself that this couldn't be happening, it was happening. And I hadn't tried very hard to prevent it. But I didn't see it coming... at least, not this quick.

I loved Brii too much to let her die.