Half Wit

For a funeral, the weather wasn't exactly gloomy like Emelie's mood. In fact, the bright shining of the sun was annoying the teenager to no end, then again, she hadn't exactly wanted the weather to get her mood even more depressed so the sun was slightly welcome.

Everyone was dressed in black, at least, the ones who came to the funeral. Emelie's heart sunk deeply as she stepped out of the car, wearing a strapless black dress with her combat boots under it. Her dreads were pinned up in a small bun on the top of her head and soft brown eyes were surrounded by a thick line of black eyeliner. Billie Joe appeared behind her and placed his hand on her lower back, slowly pushing her a little forward. Emelie jumped up at the touch and looked at him sadly before turning her eyes back to the ground.

She knew she shouldn't be sad like this, Lou always told her to have some choreographed dancing at her funeral but that was about the only thing they couldn't arrange in a few days time. The band didn't have much time left, they were leaving just after the funeral while Emelie would stay home. Kayleigh, Lou's new girlfriend from the day before she left the tour to return home and get some legal papers in order, was also present at the funeral, her eyes already red and puffy from the crying. Emelie grabbed the girl's hand in her own and gave it a comforting squeeze. They had grown somewhat closer to each other over the few days between hearing the news and the funeral itself but both told each other that it wasn't time for that yet, perhaps later in time.

Emelie had taken care of all the funeral preparations, not even caring about inviting Lou's parents to the event, the thought had crossed her mind but she quickly discarded it. The two were currently put in questioning about the car accident, being the parents of the victim and knowing the people in the car that caused the accident, anything seemed suspicious. Then again, Emelie wasn't really informed about the whole situation so she didn't know how much was known and planned.

She was more worried on planning the funeral that Lou would've wanted. The girl had talked about it, that's for sure, during some of her darker moments she had confided in Emelie about her future funeral plans, often accompannied by a smirk or a grin, only to lighten the mood and let her friend know that she had nothing to worry about. Emelie had grabbed the Ipod from the girl and scanned through some songs, surprised to see the playlists called 'calm songs' and 'songs about death' stored on the small device. Emelie had chosen from those two lists to put the songs together for the funeral, only choosing the songs that meant a lot to Lou while she knew that all the songs were equally important to the now departed teenager.

Softly on the background, the song “Never Meant To Belong” played, it was an instrumental song from a certain soundtrack Emelie didn't know, but it fit the mood of everyone in the church. It was a surprise that there were so many people from school present, knowing that Lou wasn't exactly the most loved person amongst some people, probably for her slight sarcastic mood most of the time and never taking something serious.

”I swear, if I got to die one day, I want to arrange my funeral myself and have it before I die, just to make sure I can actually join in on the mourning.”

That one line, coming from Lou's mouth only a few weeks prior, kept going through Emelie's mind for some reason. The girl had never had that requested fulfilled and sadly could not be one of the mourners on her own funeral, it brought a smile to her face still, realizing how morbid her friend really was sometimes.
Giving Kayleigh a soft kiss on the cheek, Emelie couldn't exactly resist, both girl had loved Lou equally, Kayleigh probably even more than Emelie the last few days before Lou's death. Emelie didn't held it against her at all, she was just glad that the girl had brought happiness to her friend's life even if it had been for only a few days.

She received a few cross glances from the other people in the search but Emelie ignored those, choosing to sit down on the front row next to her father and Kayleigh. Adrienne was being comforted by her husband, still not getting over the fact that 'such a nice girl' in her words had to die so young while they lived. Emelie smiled sadly at her mother and sighed a little, she had kept a strong front towards everyone for the past few days, showing everyone she could handle this and that she was following up Lou's advice and rejoiced the life the girl had instead of mourning her death. Even though the teenager still cried herself to sleep, knowing she was safe in the sanctuary of her own room.

Walking up to the front of the small church with a torn up piece of paper in her hands, Emelie sighed and bit back tears as she finally grasped to the fact that she was at a funeral of one of her best friends, a friend that wouldn't exactly stand at her door the next morning and tell her it was all just a dream and that she was overreacting. Something Lou would do for sure if she could, if not, her ghost would do it, but then there was the problem that no one could see her so that idea was quickly forgotten even though it managed to get Emelie to smile a bit.

“I don't know what I'm going to say up here, I got a paper with some text but, yeah, I don't think our little punk would've wanted me to read from a stupid paper and not put anything in it that is important to me, I guess written texts do that,” Emelie started, looking down at the piece of paper and laying it down, her hands were slightly trembling as she started to fiddle with a piece of her dress. Soft chuckles were heard throughout the church at Emelie's choice of words, making her feel more relaxed in some way.

“I think this must be the first funeral playing damn Avenged Sevenfold on top volume really, M.Shadows would be proud! I want to thank Green Day and Taking Back Sunday for joining us today, taking the time out of their busy tour schedule, I know it's hard for them to just drop out of a tour and come to a funeral but they gave their manager hell about it so yeah,” Emelie sighed and adjusted the microphone, it took her mind of the fact that she was talking to people at a funeral.

“Just so you know, the songs playing, as hardcore they can damn be, Lou chose them in her own way, I guess Ipods can really help with arranging funeral's sometimes,” Emelie still tried to lighten the mood, knowing that Lou would've wanted it, “she once told me she would arrange her own funeral while she was still alive, and actually be present at it, guess that'll never happen now but yeah, that's Lou for you.”

“I don't even want to know why things must always end in tragedy, I guess that's the way of life, but that doesn't mean I got to like it,” she pouted a bit and saw her father shake his head amused from the corner of her eye, ”and this was supposed to be some sort of text about how much we'll miss Lou and love her and here I am rambling about her,” Emelie softly admitted, looking down sadly and feeling fresh tears spring in her eyes.

“I guess I've still not grasped the fact that Lou is really not here anymore, that's probably why I'm rambling and not really crying a lot, but one thing is certain, if she would sitting on that front row now, she would yell at me to shut the fuck up already and get everything over with, too depressing, she would claim.”

“I briefly considered to enter the church with a bright pink umbrella, just because Lou always told me to do something drastic and stupid like that but I forgot it at home and I didn't really had time to find it between all my fucking bullshit in my room so yeah, sorry about that darlin'.”

She received some glares from the older people in the church, including the priest but they didn't exactly dared to say anything about it. The few young teachers at the back of the church were trying to stop themselves from laughing at Emelie's choice of words while the older ones were rolling their eyes and muttering some dark curses under their breath at Emelie for her unholy words in church.

“After this damn speech I guess my dad'll plug his damn guitar in the amplifier behind me and play a song, I say let him, he's good at that shit so yeah, besides, you get a free Green Day song, so be happy damn it, now the song on the background right now has always been a favorite of Lou, that's for sure, I remember her telling me that she wanted to sing it to Kayleigh, she eventually did that too, I hope she'll remember and cherish that moment forever, she once sang it to me but stopped in the middle of the song before cursing and telling me she forgot the lyrics momentarily. I'm still doubting if she really did but yeah.”

“Fucking hell I love that damn song!” Kayleigh yelled, forgetting for the moment that she was in church. Emelie shot her a grin and shook her head, amused at her friend.

“I guess I should stop rambling now and just let my dad do his shit, he'll probably say more important things in three minutes that I have in the past 7 minutes or so, I just want to say that, Lou was my fucking best friend, sometimes a crazy mental insane chick, probably more punk that my dad's hair and amount of eyeliner but damn, I miss her, perhaps one day I'll place a pink umbrella at her grave, but rather about caring about these things right now, ai shiteru Lou.”

Emelie walked away from the microphone and smiled at her father walking up to her, Blue safely hanging around his waist and the necessary things already standing ready. Emelie had suggested him sitting down and doing it acoustic but she had known that Lou would've wanted Blue and Billie loved that guitar so she didn't really mind when her father had arranged everything to make sure he could play his favorite guitar.

“Yeah, just like my little girl said, oh don't look at me like that Emelie, you'll always be my little girl damn it, whatever, just like she said, I'm going to play one of the songs that Lou always loved, at least, that's what she told me, the night before she left she randomly hugged me after the encore, which was this song, thanking me for playing it, I don't know why but, I had the feeling that it was going to be the last hug I'd get from the girl, guess I was right.”

Strumming the first chords from the song, Billie sighed after a few seconds and muttered a soft 'fuck' in the microphone, making Emelie giggle slightly and the priest look at Billie with a judging look and a glare.

”Another turning point, a fork stuck in the road. Time grabs you by the wrist, directs you where to go, so make the best of this test, and don't ask why, It's not a question, but a lesson learned in time,” Billie Joe's voice echoed through the church and fit perfectly with the chords being played.

"It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life. So take the photographs, and still frames in your mind, hang it on a shelf in good health and good time. Tattoos of memories and dead skin on trial, for what it's worth it was worth all the while." Billie Joe smiled and looked up from his favorite guitar, his eyes locking into Emelie's and Kayleigh as he had a small smile playing on his lips before he ended the song.

”It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life.”