This is the Calm Before the Storm

It was a Wednesday. Meaning I only had a half day and I couldn’t be happier about it. Wednesdays were definitely my favourite day. 3 hours of art in the morning with the sweetest teacher alive and then the afternoon to do whatever I wished.

Josh had sociology on a Wednesday morning, and I guessed that was why he was in such a foul mood that day. He hated his teacher and he hated the subject so I figured that was why he hadn’t spoken to me before lessons started.

I tried to dismiss the thoughts and fully focused on my art work for the two hours before break and got lost in whatever I was doing. That’s the thing I loved about art, it didn’t matter what was going on at anytime, I was able to shut the world out and just focus on what I needed too.

But not today. Josh’s face occupied my mind, and I couldn’t help but look back over the past few weeks. It wasn’t just this morning that josh had been acting off. The past few weeks we had been fighting more than usual and there were clearly things on his mind. But it seemed as if he didn’t want to let me in anymore.

Once the two hours were up, I plodded to the common room and took a seat next to my best friend Nora. She was in josh’s pervious lesson and I was curious to know how he had been.

“Nora, how was josh last lesson?” I asked. I tried not to sound to pressing but I must have failed because she gave me a quizzical look before answering.

“He was fine, he didn’t get shouted at this week, but other than that things seemed normal.”

I nodded lightly and then felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked up to find josh peering down at me.

“Can we talk?”

I nodded and gathered my things before he led me out of the common room and outside to one of the many bench’s littered around. The butterflies in my stomach were fluttering into oblivion and I had to take a few deep breaths on the way out to calm my nerves. No one was outside thankfully and we sat down. He left a little gap between us before he took a deep breath and faced me.

“I don’t think this is working anymore el. Im sorry.” Talk about blunt. Then again josh never did like to beat around the bush. He spoke clearly but it was quiet. I could feel my blood running cold, and I looked up into his eyes. They were once so bright, but now they were flat and emotionless. “I still love you, just not how I used to”

I couldn’t speak or think or move. He went to reach for my hand but I snatched it away.

“Say something el, please” he pleaded but I just stood up and went to walk away. “Elodia, don’t do this” he called after me, and that made me stop. I turned back to him, anger filling my blood so strong it almost made my vision go blurry.

“Do what josh? In case you haven’t noticed you’re the one who wants to end this”

“But I still want us to be friends”

I couldn’t help the laugh that escaped my lips; he flinched at the sound and then looked at the ground. “Friends? Really?” I spat at him. “You think I want anything to do with you anymore? How could you do this to me? Does 3 years mean nothing to you?” I wouldn’t let him see me cry, but even if I wanted to it wouldn’t have happened. The tears didn’t want to seem to fall. My hands balled into fists and I was shaking all over.

He collapsed back down on the bench and put his head in his hands so I marched off. I went in through the other entrance so no one saw me, and thankfully josh didn’t follow. I hid away in the loos until the bell rung once more, and I made my way to my final hour of art. A fake smile plastered on my face.

There are only 3 people in my art class including myself so it I could easily just sit and not be bothered by anyone. I picked up a pencil and began to draw but I seemed to lack the inspiration to create anything even vaguely presentable. Thankfully my art teacher let the class go early and I rushed off before the other two girls could catch up.

I rushed up to the common room to sign out, but as soon as I walked through the door, I found Nora standing there. She looked up when I walked in and a warm smile filled her face.

“Hey love, where did you get to at break?” I wanted to tell her so badly, but then again I didn’t want to cry in front of everyone. Plus if I said it out loud then it would be real. I think my face must have given something away because her face changed into a look of concern. “Elodia, what’s wrong?”

I was about to speak when Nora’s obnoxiously loud boyfriend, James Lewis, sauntered in. Don’t get me wrong, I love the guy but he can really pick his moments.

“What’s shaking ladies?” he said and placed a kiss on Nora’s cheek. A pang of jealousy shot through me. He quickly signed out and then grabbed her hand.

“Can you give us a sec love?” Nora said and he nodded before walking off to speak to someone. “El, what’s up?”

“Nothing, it’s um, time of the month” I laughed nervously. She looked like she didn’t believe me but realised I didn’t want to press the matter any further. She quickly wrapped her arms around me, and I must have held on a little too tightly because she pulled back and looked at me in the eyes.

“Are you sure that’s all?”

“Yeah, I just wanna get home” I sighed.

“Ok, well lets go then” she smiled and I quickly signed in whiles she called James back over. We all left, and when we got the gate Nora questioned me where I was staying.

“Mum’s” I smiled, thankfully that was in the complete opposite direction from where James and Nora where heading. “So I’ll um catch you later” I said and I began to walk away.

“We can walk you home if you want” James called but I just shook my head. “I’ll be fine” I shouted back and made my way home. Thankfully I only lived a 2 minute walk away, and soon I was home. Mum was at work and Zac was at school so I was home alone.

I collapsed onto the couch and finally let the tears spill from my eyes.