Hiding My Heart

When I woke up I was very comfortable but extremely hot. How did it get so hot in here? It’s like it is a sauna. I tried to go back to sleep but it was just way too hot. I went to sit up but something tightened its grip on my waist. I looked down and saw a tanned arm and then I remembered that Jake came over last night. I looked up at his face. He was still sleeping and he looked so very innocent. He looked like the boy that I fell in love with before all of this wolf stuff. I wish I could see this everyday. I leaned up as much as I could and pressed a soft kiss on his lips. He still didn’t make a move so I tried to get up once again. His arms were so tight on my waist that I couldn’t move. I had to wake the poor kid up. I gently shook him a bit and called softly to him.

“Jake, baby, you don’t have to wake up you just have to let me go. Please.” He still didn’t move. The only thing that showed that he had any recognition that I was trying to move was the small little smirk on his face. What a jerk! He was awake but didn’t want me to know.

“I swear Jacob Black you better let me go right now I know that you're awake.” His beautiful brown eyes opened. I gave him a smile and went to move off the bed. He finally let go of my waist but right when I was about to stand up he pulled on my hand and gave me a quick kiss before lying back down and closing his eyes.

“Jake. You should go home. You look like you're still tired and I have to go get Leah in an hour,” I called over my shoulder as I looked at my pitiful amount of clothing. I hope I had enough money to at least get a couple more clothes because most of them I have grown out of. I jumped a bit when I felt Jake’s hands on my waist. I didn’t hear him get up and out of bed.

“Do you have to go with Leah today? I wanted to spend time with you.”

“Yes Jake I do. Also don’t you have to patrol today?” I turned around and saw the look on his face, it told me I was right and then I looked at the clock it was almost 11:20. “Well your face says that I was right about you patrolling. Your shift starts in 40 minutes. How about this, you can stay here the whole time I am getting ready and when I leave to get Leah you go to patrol and then I’ll meet you at Emily’s after I’m done shopping and you're done patrolling. Then if you're lucky you might be able to sleep over again.” I gave him a wink and pushed him off so I could grab the only summer dress that I owned. I wanted to go for a girly look considering I’m always dressed like a whore with short shorts and a tank top or even a sports bra. I couldn’t help it I’m always just so hot.

“Stay here I will be right back and keep quiet I’m not really sure who is here still.” I walked into the bathroom and got dressed and started my morning routine. After I finished brushing my teeth I did a quick sweep of the house then remembered that Em took over my shift last night and he wouldn’t be home until Jake took his shift. I also didn’t see my mom around she must have been at work. I think she gave up on me because there wasn’t any strongly worded note around any place in the house. I ran up to my room and saw Jake laying on my bed with his eyes closed. I crawled on top of him so I was straddling his waist.

“Jakey. Wakey wakey! I know you want to sleep but it’s time for you to wake up. You should have slept when I was patrolling last night. If you wake up no I’ll make you a quick lunch so you don’t have to go patrolling hungry,” I said this softly in his ear and gave him a kiss when I was done. I knew he was awake when I said something about food. His response to my kiss was just what I was expecting. He kissed me back right when my lips were on his and his hands went straight to my waist.

I ended the kiss and started to giggle. “Jake, I’m going to make some food. You can come down with me no one is home.”

We went down stairs and I went straight to work on some food. I didn’t make much just some sandwiches and chips but Jake didn’t care. I think he was just excited that someone was making him food and he wasn’t going to go patrolling without eating. We talked about nothing as we sat at the table eating and it was nice but not too soon after we finished eating did we have to go.

“Alright Jake becareful while patrolling! You better not do anything stupid. I’ll meet you at Emily’s after me and Leah are done shopping.” With a quick kiss on his cheek I was gone and in my car going to Leah’s.

When I got to Leah’s I honked my horn and waited for Leah to get out to the car. I was actually pretty excited for this day. I understood that Leah is going to be kind of distant and she wasn’t going to be happy go lucky but I knew that Leah needed to get out of this town for a little bit and actually act like a girl. We are stuck around those guys all the time and we needed to get away and actually act like we aren’t some creepy people who turn into wolves.

“Hey! I’m actually excited for this. Let’s get away for awhile,” Leah beamed. She looked pretty in a pair of shorts and a pink tank top. Her short hair was flicked out and she just looked like she was a normal girl. I was excited to see her smile. It was something I don’t think anyone has seen since she was with Sam.

“Yeah I’m excited to! I looked at my clothes and realized I really look like a whore. There literally is nothing covering me. I feel bad because this dress is killing me. I feel so hot in it.” I heard Leah laugh at my stupid heat problem. I’m the hottest person in the pack heat wise. I’m not sure why. Everyone’s body runs at a nice heat of 108 degrees where as mine runs a whopping 109. You would think that it wouldn’t be a big difference but oh it is. I’m always hot. The dress I wore today probably wouldn’t have bothered Leah it had cap sleeves and it full white lace with a white underlayer. It reached just above my knees but It was just too much for me.

“You know if you would just cut your hair shorter you just might be a little better heat wise. I mean if you keep your hair short you would have a little less heat up in your head.”

I laughed at how weird she sounded trying to explain how my long hair should be cut. After that little conversation the ride to Port Angeles. I pulled into the parking lot across from a little tourist area. Then pulled myself out of the car.

“Come on Leah there is a cute second hand shop just down the road from here and who knows maybe we'll run into some cute guys for you.” I connected my arm with hers and started on my way to the shop.

“So Anna, I saw Jake going towards your house last night when I was trying to go to mine. Did he stay over?”

My cheeks must have been so red. I couldn’t believe she brought that up. I thought this was supposed to be a girls day out. I guess I just assumed that my new boyfriend wouldn’t be brought up because it was a sore spot for her.

“Yes he stayed the night. He only came over because he was worried about me patrolling. Which I’m still a little ticked at because I have been a wolf longer than he has. I mean come on what was he thinking but after a little argument he laid down with me to talk a little more. After a while he saw that I was tired and went to leave but I was too comfortable cuddling with him so I asked him to leave. That is all that happened nothing else so don’t go thinking that we did some other things that couples do.” While I was explaining my cheeks got redder and redder. She laughed at me and dropped the subject.

We got to the store and I rushed to the dresses. I thought being girly would a be good idea. It was funny because it was newly spring and they had so many summer dresses it made my head spin. I found many dresses that had no sleeves or were strapless or even some halternecks. I got five dresses and a couple pairs of shorts all for under 40 dollars. That is why I love to shop resale. Sadly just spending that much really put me back because I was that poor.

Leah looked like she got a lot of clothes all tank tops and shorts. Nothing super girly but I guess if thats what she wanted. I still couldn’t help but try to get her to get at least one dress.

“You know that dress you made me buy? I’ll probably wear it once and it will end up in your closet. I just have a feeling you made me get it because you didn’t have enough money to get it,” Leah joked as we made our way back to the car. I laughed because she knew me so well.

“You think that lowly of me?” I stopped and asked in a mock hurt tone. She just laughed at me and continued walking.

We made our way to the car in record time and started on our way to La Push.

“Anna? Thank you for taking me out today. I know you probably wanted to hang out with Jake but I needed to get away and you're the only one that realized that. You are an awesome friend and I’m so happy that you are here for me to talk to.”

“Well Leah, I’m happy we did this also. I know I’m actually happy to get away and if you need to get away ever again just tell me and I’ll be fine with going on another shopping trip. I’m here for you Leah, seriously, if you ever need anything just tell me.” She gave me a smile and looked out of the window. It grew quiet and it was nice to think and know that you had a friend here with me.

“Do you ever think I will find someone that will make me happy like Sam?” she asked me this in a small voice that made her sound small and broken.

“Leah. You will find someone that will make you ten times more happy than Sam is with Emily. You deserve that. I know the guys are hard on you and everything because you’re so cold around them but I know why. It’s because your a broken girl and honestly the fact that you can be around them is something that I look up to. I wish I could be as strong as you are. I couldn’t even be around Jake and Bella when they came around. It made me sick and the fact that you can be around them is commendable.” I meant every single word that I said to her. I thought she was a strong girl and I was proud of her.

“You seriously are an amazing friend, Anna.” She sounded happier when she said this like her moment before this never happened.

“Leah you're pretty amazing yourself.”

I dropped Leah off at her house and she gave me a hug good bye. It I was so happy with how this day went and I was ecstatic that I could get closer to my fellow she-wolf. I went home and threw my clothes into my room and left my keys on the hook then went outside to run to Emily’s house.

“Hey babe! I’ll see you at Emily’s! My shift is almost over.” I heard Jake practically scream in my head when he realized I was in my wolf form.

“I’m on my way to her house now. I’m going to see if she needs anymore help cooking. I’ll save you a muffin! See you in a bit.” It was nice to hear from my boyfriend but I needed to get to Emily’s so I shifted back and walked into the house.

“Emily!!!!” I screamed when I saw her.

“Anna! I haven’t seen you in forever! Why have you been gone so long?!”

“Oh you know I was hanging out with my boyfriend then went shopping with Leah.” I smiled when I saw the shock on her face and walked into the kitchen so I could help her cook.

“Boyfriend?! What?!”

“Yeah! I have a boyfriend but don’t tell Jake because he will probably freak.”

“So it isn’t Jake? Who is this kid?”

“Now that is a surprise. This kid is just someone to preoccupy my time while Jake is being stupid.”

“I see well Jake and Sam should be getting in soon and so should all of the other boys because the food is almost done. So if you don’t want Jake to know then we should stop talking about it now. We will talk about this later,” She said with a wink.

We cooked in silence for a couple minutes before I heard the pounding of someone coming towards the door. I heard the laughing and joking of the guys so I knew it wasn’t something to freak about.

Just as I put the last of the food on the table and made sure me and Emily had food the guys came pouring into the house.

“Hey babe,” Jake said loud enough for everyone to hear and wrapped his arm around my waist and kissed my cheek. I blushed at his display of affection and laughed at everyone’s crazy looks.

“WAIT! WHAT?! You lied to me!!!!” Emily screamed. I laughed at her and she pouted at me.

“I didn’t really lie to you Em I just didn’t tell you it was Jake.”

“Oh sure... When did this happen?”

“A couple days ago. Let’s talk about this later I’m hungry!” I cried and started to eat the food that was on my plate.