Anything for Us

The Winter break started only a week after my birthday, and I couldn’t have been happier. Things were a little awkward between Dakota and I for a day or two after the party, even though we made out again when we eventually went to my bed to sleep. I put it down to severe hangover, tiredness and the fact that Dakota hasn’t blown me in a long time. But we sorted our shit out pretty quickly and got back to normal, the only occasional thought of his lips around my dick passing through my head. What? He knows how to suck a guy off.

I spent the first week of the break just chilling out with Dakota, Yasmin and Zach, alternating our time between our various saunas, our various movie rooms and the city's shopping malls. Oh yeah, our lives are good. Scott has taken time off work starting from three days before Christmas until New Years Day, meaning Dad has pretty much done the same. It’s strange actually, to have Dad around so much for Christmas. I’ll have to thank Scott for breaking him into a new routine.

On Christmas Eve however, I was woken up before midday. Not. Happy.

“Uh, Angel? Your Dad wants you to come downstairs. Asap,” Scott announced awkwardly.

“What? Why?” I groaned, barely rolling over to look at him.

“I don’t think you’ll believe me without seeing it,” Scott said, rubbing the back of his neck.

I frowned. What’s going on?

“Alright, I need to shower though. Um, I’ll be down as soon as possible?” I said.

“Sure. I’ll get some breakfast ready for you,” Scott smiled.

As soon as he left my room, I forced myself to get out of bed. I knew if I didn’t I’d just fall asleep again. 20 minutes later, with sweatpants, a hoodie and slightly damp hair, I stumbled downstairs. This had better be good.

“Kitchen!” my dad called.

I smiled as I got closer to the kitchen. Mm, Scott’s famous blueberry pancakes. Fuck I’m hungry.

But what I saw when I walked into the kitchen was the last thing I expected. Or wanted. And completely put me off my food.

“Rocco?” I gasped.

“How’s it going, brother?” he smirked.

There he sat, my mirror image. Only now he’d cut his hair short, leaving his curls cropped close. And he had a sadness in his eyes instead of the cold hatred he’d left with. So that was different.

But still not enough.

“A lot better without you here,” I sneered.

“Angel…” my dad warned.

“What Dad? Should I be happy that my homophobic dick of a twin who decided that your sexuality wasn’t a good enough reason to stay here with me, decided to pay us a surprise Christmas visit?” I said angrily.

“I’m not just visiting – I’m here for good,” Rocco said with a mocking wave.

“Oh, that just makes this all so much better,” I retorted.

“Just calm down, Angel. Isabella…your mom, has signed over parental consent. Rocco really is here permanently,” my Dad said simply.

“How can you be so calm? This insensitive jerk-off told you that your divorce from mom because you announced that you’re gay was an abomination,” I sneered.

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Rocco grimaced.

“Oh, well, now you’ve apologised,” I said sarcastically.

“This isn’t like you to get so dramatic,” Scott frowned.

“Excuse me if I’m a little upset after being abandoned by my twin when I needed him most!” I retorted.

“I didn’t want to leave you, Angel. I was just angry,” Rocco said softly.

“And yet you never bothered to talk to me in over two years?” I spat.

Rocco gritted his teeth, staring me down. Oh good. At least he still has his infamous temper. When no-one said anything, I shook my head, trying to clear myself of all this anger. I don’t want to be in this mood on Christmas Eve.

“Look, as much as I appreciate this impromptu brotherly bonding session, I’m going to go over to Dakota’s,” I sighed.

“What, that little fairy?” Rocco scoffed.

Without hesitating I growled, slamming him against the wall in an instant, pinning him with my forearm to his throat. Rocco’s eyes went wide in shock and my dad leapt forward to stop me, but Scott held him back. Why thank you Scott.

“You might want to know that I’m bisexual and have a preference towards males before you start labelling people. Especially Dakota,” I snarled.

Rocco spluttered an incomprehensible response, only making me angrier. How can he still be so homophobic?

“Angel, come on, let him go,” Dad urged.

I pressed my arm in a little harder, before releasing him, stepping back only a little.

“Y-You’re bisexual?” he said, surprised.

“Yeah, I am. So if you’re still going to be a homophobic asshole like you were when mom and dad split up, then you can fuck off back to Milan because this house is full of men lusting after men,” I said angrily.

“N-No, you don’t understand,” Rocco said quickly.

“Enlighten me then, you ignorant bastard,” I said mockingly.

“Angel!” Dad scolded.

I gritted my teeth and looked down, clenching my fists slightly. I will not hit him. I will not hit him. I will not…

“What I said about Dakota was just a reflex. A reflex that I'm recently trying to grow out of. I need to explain why I came here,” Rocco said firmly.

I narrowed my eyes, not liking the desperation in his eyes. He is my twin, after all.

“Fine. Talk,” I muttered.

“Can we sit down?” he asked.

“Fine,” I muttered again.

Stiffly and silently, the four of us sat down around the kitchen table, Rocco looking awkwardly at his hands while the rest of us stared at him.

“You wanted to say something?” I said coldly.

“Mom didn’t sign the papers. Not knowingly anyway,” Rocco said softly.

“What?” we chorused.

“I told her that I needed her signature to release my clothes from the policia,”

What the fuck?!

“The police?! What did you do?!” Dad exasperated.

“I didn’t do anything! That’s what the whole problem is!” Rocco spluttered.

Dad and Scott shared a glance. I just stared at my twin. What the fuck has happened to him? The Rocco I knew was always calm and collected.

“Why don’t you start from the beginning?” I said softly.

Rocco looked at me, clearly surprised, but nodded his thanks.

“When I moved to Milan with mom, I didn’t keep quiet about my homophobia. I was angry, so angry, but I made a few very good friends over there. Eventually I calmed down a bit but by then they knew my opinions. A week ago, my closest friend Antonio, or Ant as he preferred, was getting really quiet. When I confronted him about it he said there was something really important he had to tell me. But when he came over, I’d just had an argument with mom so I was in a bad mood. Ant and I ended up arguing too, and he stormed out of the house before he told me. Wearing my clothes,”

That explains the clothes that Rocco had to 'get back' from the cops. Rocco licked his bottom lip out of nerves, looking down at his hands again.

“When he didn’t come into school the next day, I went over his house. I thought he was just sulking or something. But what I found was his mom completely distraught, sobbing as she clutched his baby blanket. She told me…told me that he’d been beaten to death walking home from my house,”

Scott gasped. My jaw just dropped. Beaten to death?

“It’s a very Catholic neighbourhood. Apparently someone had found out what Ant’s secret was before Ant had told me…and they’d killed him because of it,”

“What was his secret?” I asked softly.

Rocco looked up at me, his eyes shining with tears.

“Ant was gay. He was so scared to tell me because of how opposed I’d been but if I’d let him tell me then he wouldn’t have walked home and gotten beaten up,”

“Oh fuck, Rocco. I’m so sorry,” I murmured.

“I just…because I’m such an asshole, he lost his life. He could still be alive if it wasn’t me!” Rocco whimpered.

“Hey, it’s not your fault. It’s the fault of the guys who attacked him, not yours,” Dad said firmly.

“Do you know what the clincher is?” Rocco said with a bitter laugh.

We stayed silent.

“When I told mom what happened, she said that he deserved to die for his sins,” Rocco spat.

Holy shit.

“Fuck. I knew she was bad, but not this bad,” Dad said, paling.

“That’s when I knew how much of a mistake I made. That was when I knew I couldn’t be there any longer. I packed up as much stuff as I could carry and got her to sign the forms after I went to the lawyer. All I want is your forgiveness and the chance to start anew,” Rocco said softly.

“Of course,” Dad said quickly.

“I want a chance to get to know you,” Scott nodded, smiling.

I chewed my bottom lip, staying silent. Could I forgive him? After all the pain and anger he put me through?

“Angel?” Rocco asked quietly.

I’ve never heard him sound so lost before.

“Please?” Rocco asked even quieter.

One look at that mirror face and I knew my answer.

“Yeah. You can stay,” I nodded.

“Thank you. I promise you, I’m going to make everything right,” Rocco insisted, gripping my hands.

“Yeah, I know. Just…it’s going to be hard convincing my friends that,” I shrugged.

“Dakota doesn’t like me much, does he?” Rocco mused.

“Nope,” I smirked.

Rocco just smirked back at me.

“Bring it on,”