Sequel: A Past To Repeat Itself ›
Status: Completed!
A Lifetime to Struggle
Have You Heard The News That You're Dead?
It’s not every day you watch your best friend lay in a hospital bed, their eyes closed, and their body not responding to anything. If and when you saw this for your own eyes, not only did your heart break into a million gazillion pieces, but you find that your body is completely numb. It’s like everything stops working, and all that’s left is your ability to breathe.
No matter how many times Brian tried to tell me things would be okay, I couldn’t find it in me to see this how he did. I couldn’t believe him. This was not okay, and it would never be okay. Jimmy was in critical condition. His skull was split open, and he just barely broke his back. The doctor said there’s a good chance he won’t be able to remember most things. People, places, times, and memories. Jimmy was –In a way—gone. His crazy, beautiful, artistic, hilarious self would never be the same.
Matt was a wreck. He could find it in himself to stay in the same room with Jimmy’s somewhat lifeless body. He stayed in the hospital, just down in the food court with Natalia trying to settle himself out.
“You shouldn’t stay here.” Zacky said, resting his hand on my shoulder. This wasn’t going to work. Brian already tried to get me out of here; tried to make me leave. But I wouldn’t. I needed to be here for him; He needed someone, and that someone was going to be me.
“Why not?” I asked.
“Because, It’s only make you feel worse.” His voice wasn’t the normal joy filled but laid back voice. It was deeper, an indication that he was tired.
“I’d feel a hell of a lot better here, than being at home knowing my best friend’s unconscious body is sitting alone in a hospital room.” I turned around to face him, noticing that all the make-up he’d had on before was now off. He bit on his snake bites, shaking his head.
“Harm, you’re a wreck. Matt needs you—“
“I don’t even want to talk to Matt right now.” I snapped.
Matt had gotten a piece of my mind. After I noticed the blood from Jimmy’s head on my hands, I felt a giant fit of rage rack through my body. I started yelling at him, letting him know just how stupid he was, and that he had a problem he needed to fix. When I think about it now, I realize I was a bit rough on him. But he needed it; A reality check. I couldn’t be nice to him every day for the rest of our lives.
“Do it for Bri. He’s worried about you.” Zacky said, his eyes closing.
“Tell him not to. I’m fine.” I replied, turning back to look at Jimmy. I felt the tears come one again. Zacky was right. It would be better if I left, but I just won’t. I feel like I’m letting him down in some way. I knew that if I were in the position Jimmy was in now, he’d stay for me. He’d wait here until I woke up. He’d help me remember all the things I would have forgotten.
“Tell him yourself.” Zacky said, as we both heard the door open. I turned around to see a very exhausted Brian step through the door, his make up too was gone. His hair was all tangled, his shoulders slumped down and dark rings around his eyes. He looked at me, a begging look in his dark eyes. Zacky nodded his head, and slid right past him, closing the door behind him.
“Hun, Please, Jimmy would want you to come home.” Brian sighed.
“And I would argue with him.” I replied, thinking out the scene in my head.
“He’s not gonna wake up tonight. We can come back tomorrow morning and—“
“No Brian!” I exclaimed. “You know Jimmy as well as I do. If it was either one of us lying there, he’d stay here until we woke up. He’d do anything for us, and that’s what I’m doing for him.”
He sighed heavily, running both his hands down his face before crossing his arms over his chest.
“Fine. But I’m staying with you.” He replied. His voice was groggy, and dry. He was seriously tired. I wonder what time it was.
“Okay.” I stated nodding. He pulled me into his chest, and hugged me as tightly as he could.
“He’ll be fine, I promise. Jimmy’ll pull through. He’s not gonna give up on us so easily.”
I felt a tear or two slip away from my eyes. I hope he was right. I couldn’t afford to lose Jimmy. Not now.
Not when I’m truly happy.
“I’ll get a nurse to bring in another chair.” He said, while letting me go. He gave me a soft kiss, before opening the door and slowly walked out. Once he was out of sight, I sat down in the one chair closest to Jimmy’s face.
“You son of a bitch.” I said, shaking my head. “I’ve always told you that Matt was stronger than you. But you never listened, now look where you are.” I wiped away some of my tears and chuckled. “But you did it out of heart. You care about him; you didn’t want to see him get hurt. You’re such a good friend to him, to all of us. Don’t you dare leave us now. We love you too much to see you go like this. You still have so much to see, and a hell of a lot more to make fun of. And you have a record to go show the world, stages to perform on, people to meet, a crowd to hear. Jeez Sullivan. What do you think you’re doing? We all need you here. Matt so you can keep under control when I’m not around, Johnny because he needs some love, Zacky so he can have someone to practise his jokes on, Brian because well... You’re his best friend and me so I can stay sane.” I couldn’t stop the soon down pour of tears that rolled down my face. “I love you Jimmy. No matter what happens.”
I heard heavy footsteps nearing the door, so I quickly kissed Jimmy’s forehead, and sat back down. I watched as Brian walked in, holding a chair on his big arms. He set it down next to mine, and sat in it.
He looked from me to Jimmy, then back to me lifting his eye brow. “Did you talk to him?” He asked.
I sighed, but nodded. “People in comas can apparently hear you. They just can’t react.” I stated.
“Really?” Brian asked, crossing his arms, while kicking out his legs in front of him and throwing his head back.
“Yeah.” I leaned down, and started undoing my heels. After, I brought my legs up to my chest, and laid my head on Brian’s big chest.
“Well in that case. Jimmy, if you really can hear me, then you are one crazy ass mother fucker.” Brian stated. I laughed and hit him in the chest.
“Be nice. Tell him you love him.” I said.
“He already knows though!” Brian whined.
“I know you love me, but you tell me every day!” I argued.
“Because I have too! You’re my girlfriend!”
“Brian.” I said, not wanting to use my ‘I’m-the-girlfriend-do-what-I-say-‘, but using it anyways.
“Fine, fine. Jimmy, I do love you. You’re like a brother to me. So you’d better pull through this.” Brian looked at me, his eyes immediately softening. “There’s still so much for you to see. The world, the people... Harmony and I when we’re old together, being the world’s best god father to our kids...”
My heart beat quickened a bit. Brian was planning our future together? We haven’t even been together all that long. Kids? I couldn’t be a mother. I’m not cut out for a mom type roll. Although... Our kids would be real lookers...
“I’m going to hurt you if you don’t wake up soon.”
I wrapped my arm around his waist and hugged him tightly. I knew he was being strong for me. If I weren’t here he’d be crying his eyes out begging for Jimmy to wake up. But since I had already done that, it stopped Brian from doing so.
“Are you gonna be okay? You’re in a dress, you must be cold.” Brian said.
“I’ll be fine.” I replied. But my body betrayed me with a shiver. I was decently cold, but I didn’t want any more hassle.
“You’re shivering though,” he stated.
“I’ll be fine.” I repeated. But Brian wouldn’t have it. He took off his jacket and gave it to me.
“Put it on, then come sit in my lap.”
“Brian, really I—“
“Don’t argue with me.” He said, while sitting himself up and opening his arms. I shook my head, but went along with it. I could never deny his offers to be in his arms. So I stood up and slipped the jacket on, and sat down in his lap. He closed his arms around me, and I rested my head just under his chin.
“What if he doesn’t make it through?” Brian asked. His soft side was starting to come on. It was a side I so rarely got to see from him. He worked so hard to maintain his tough guy image, but now it was finally starting to crack.
“He will.” I said, trying to reassure him.
But I wasn’t even sure myself. What if he doesn’t make it?
No matter how many times Brian tried to tell me things would be okay, I couldn’t find it in me to see this how he did. I couldn’t believe him. This was not okay, and it would never be okay. Jimmy was in critical condition. His skull was split open, and he just barely broke his back. The doctor said there’s a good chance he won’t be able to remember most things. People, places, times, and memories. Jimmy was –In a way—gone. His crazy, beautiful, artistic, hilarious self would never be the same.
Matt was a wreck. He could find it in himself to stay in the same room with Jimmy’s somewhat lifeless body. He stayed in the hospital, just down in the food court with Natalia trying to settle himself out.
“You shouldn’t stay here.” Zacky said, resting his hand on my shoulder. This wasn’t going to work. Brian already tried to get me out of here; tried to make me leave. But I wouldn’t. I needed to be here for him; He needed someone, and that someone was going to be me.
“Why not?” I asked.
“Because, It’s only make you feel worse.” His voice wasn’t the normal joy filled but laid back voice. It was deeper, an indication that he was tired.
“I’d feel a hell of a lot better here, than being at home knowing my best friend’s unconscious body is sitting alone in a hospital room.” I turned around to face him, noticing that all the make-up he’d had on before was now off. He bit on his snake bites, shaking his head.
“Harm, you’re a wreck. Matt needs you—“
“I don’t even want to talk to Matt right now.” I snapped.
Matt had gotten a piece of my mind. After I noticed the blood from Jimmy’s head on my hands, I felt a giant fit of rage rack through my body. I started yelling at him, letting him know just how stupid he was, and that he had a problem he needed to fix. When I think about it now, I realize I was a bit rough on him. But he needed it; A reality check. I couldn’t be nice to him every day for the rest of our lives.
“Do it for Bri. He’s worried about you.” Zacky said, his eyes closing.
“Tell him not to. I’m fine.” I replied, turning back to look at Jimmy. I felt the tears come one again. Zacky was right. It would be better if I left, but I just won’t. I feel like I’m letting him down in some way. I knew that if I were in the position Jimmy was in now, he’d stay for me. He’d wait here until I woke up. He’d help me remember all the things I would have forgotten.
“Tell him yourself.” Zacky said, as we both heard the door open. I turned around to see a very exhausted Brian step through the door, his make up too was gone. His hair was all tangled, his shoulders slumped down and dark rings around his eyes. He looked at me, a begging look in his dark eyes. Zacky nodded his head, and slid right past him, closing the door behind him.
“Hun, Please, Jimmy would want you to come home.” Brian sighed.
“And I would argue with him.” I replied, thinking out the scene in my head.
“He’s not gonna wake up tonight. We can come back tomorrow morning and—“
“No Brian!” I exclaimed. “You know Jimmy as well as I do. If it was either one of us lying there, he’d stay here until we woke up. He’d do anything for us, and that’s what I’m doing for him.”
He sighed heavily, running both his hands down his face before crossing his arms over his chest.
“Fine. But I’m staying with you.” He replied. His voice was groggy, and dry. He was seriously tired. I wonder what time it was.
“Okay.” I stated nodding. He pulled me into his chest, and hugged me as tightly as he could.
“He’ll be fine, I promise. Jimmy’ll pull through. He’s not gonna give up on us so easily.”
I felt a tear or two slip away from my eyes. I hope he was right. I couldn’t afford to lose Jimmy. Not now.
Not when I’m truly happy.
“I’ll get a nurse to bring in another chair.” He said, while letting me go. He gave me a soft kiss, before opening the door and slowly walked out. Once he was out of sight, I sat down in the one chair closest to Jimmy’s face.
“You son of a bitch.” I said, shaking my head. “I’ve always told you that Matt was stronger than you. But you never listened, now look where you are.” I wiped away some of my tears and chuckled. “But you did it out of heart. You care about him; you didn’t want to see him get hurt. You’re such a good friend to him, to all of us. Don’t you dare leave us now. We love you too much to see you go like this. You still have so much to see, and a hell of a lot more to make fun of. And you have a record to go show the world, stages to perform on, people to meet, a crowd to hear. Jeez Sullivan. What do you think you’re doing? We all need you here. Matt so you can keep under control when I’m not around, Johnny because he needs some love, Zacky so he can have someone to practise his jokes on, Brian because well... You’re his best friend and me so I can stay sane.” I couldn’t stop the soon down pour of tears that rolled down my face. “I love you Jimmy. No matter what happens.”
I heard heavy footsteps nearing the door, so I quickly kissed Jimmy’s forehead, and sat back down. I watched as Brian walked in, holding a chair on his big arms. He set it down next to mine, and sat in it.
He looked from me to Jimmy, then back to me lifting his eye brow. “Did you talk to him?” He asked.
I sighed, but nodded. “People in comas can apparently hear you. They just can’t react.” I stated.
“Really?” Brian asked, crossing his arms, while kicking out his legs in front of him and throwing his head back.
“Yeah.” I leaned down, and started undoing my heels. After, I brought my legs up to my chest, and laid my head on Brian’s big chest.
“Well in that case. Jimmy, if you really can hear me, then you are one crazy ass mother fucker.” Brian stated. I laughed and hit him in the chest.
“Be nice. Tell him you love him.” I said.
“He already knows though!” Brian whined.
“I know you love me, but you tell me every day!” I argued.
“Because I have too! You’re my girlfriend!”
“Brian.” I said, not wanting to use my ‘I’m-the-girlfriend-do-what-I-say-‘, but using it anyways.
“Fine, fine. Jimmy, I do love you. You’re like a brother to me. So you’d better pull through this.” Brian looked at me, his eyes immediately softening. “There’s still so much for you to see. The world, the people... Harmony and I when we’re old together, being the world’s best god father to our kids...”
My heart beat quickened a bit. Brian was planning our future together? We haven’t even been together all that long. Kids? I couldn’t be a mother. I’m not cut out for a mom type roll. Although... Our kids would be real lookers...
“I’m going to hurt you if you don’t wake up soon.”
I wrapped my arm around his waist and hugged him tightly. I knew he was being strong for me. If I weren’t here he’d be crying his eyes out begging for Jimmy to wake up. But since I had already done that, it stopped Brian from doing so.
“Are you gonna be okay? You’re in a dress, you must be cold.” Brian said.
“I’ll be fine.” I replied. But my body betrayed me with a shiver. I was decently cold, but I didn’t want any more hassle.
“You’re shivering though,” he stated.
“I’ll be fine.” I repeated. But Brian wouldn’t have it. He took off his jacket and gave it to me.
“Put it on, then come sit in my lap.”
“Brian, really I—“
“Don’t argue with me.” He said, while sitting himself up and opening his arms. I shook my head, but went along with it. I could never deny his offers to be in his arms. So I stood up and slipped the jacket on, and sat down in his lap. He closed his arms around me, and I rested my head just under his chin.
“What if he doesn’t make it through?” Brian asked. His soft side was starting to come on. It was a side I so rarely got to see from him. He worked so hard to maintain his tough guy image, but now it was finally starting to crack.
“He will.” I said, trying to reassure him.
But I wasn’t even sure myself. What if he doesn’t make it?
♠ ♠ ♠
Aww, poor Jimmy :(I think i'm loosing readers, haha >:( anyways, the story is soon coming to an end, I just want to let you all know :) I have many surprises planned out though. Like I said before though, they aren't gonna make you happy.