Turn the Clock

Waking up in your own bed has to be the best feeling ever when you haven’t slept in it for a while, the duvet was comfy and warm and surrounded my fragile body like a marshmallow. It was good to finally be home though, no disgusting hospital food and no nurses pestering you every 5 minutes. The sun was shining its way through my window, the birds were chirping from the tree just outside my window and the blue sky was clear from any clouds. To me, it was too good to miss, so I slowly climbed from my bed, having a quick stretch before I headed into the bathroom for a quick shower.

The smell of pancakes filled my nostrils when I reached the bottom of the stairs, which once would make me feel hungry and run to the table but now it only made me feel nauseous. I brought my hand up to cover my mouth, before I turned on my heel and ran towards the downstairs bathroom, slinging up the toilet seat before I emptied the contents of my stomach, that was pretty much empty making which only made it more painful. I heard my mom rushing down the hallway, and the next thing I knew she was stood behind me, rubbing my back. She didn’t need to told my hair back, it was still short from my last chemotherapy session which had been a few months a go so it fell just a little under my ears.

“Oh sweetie, not again” she sighed as she helping me up from my crouched position over the toilet.

“It’s fine mom, really. Just the smell of the pancakes…” I muttered, wiping my mouth with the sleeve of my jumper.

“This is not good Annie, you can barely get a mouthful of food down you before you bring it back up again. Look how skinny you’ve gotten, you even have to wear those ridiculously large jumpers so people won’t notice.” she stated as she walked me into the living room, helping me onto the couch.

“I know, ma. Really I do. As far as the jumpers go, I don’t want people to ask questions” I replied, sighing heavily as I let my eyes flutter shut resting my head on the back of the couch.

“I know. Just sit here and relax for a bit, do you want anything?” she asked.

“Yeah, can you grab my laptop please?” I replied, opening my eyes to look at her, giving a weak smile.

She nodded, before she left the room quickly and headed upstairs.

John

The guys and I had been back from tour two days, we hadn’t planned anything seeing as we all needed to catch up on some well earned sleep. I was currently laid out on the couch in the living room, my guitar in hand playing the chords for Saving Grace. One of many songs that I had wrote about her, Annie. I sighed heavily at the thought of letting her go. I placed my guitar beside me before getting up off the couch, looking out the window the sun was out, the blue sky was clear. I needed to get out of this apartment, so I grabbed my ray bans from the coffee table and slipped out the front door, and into the fresh air. After locking the door, I set off down the street for the first time in months, nothing had changed much. Kids were running around all over the place, playing on their bikes and kicking balls around with each other. It brought a smile to my face seeing them having fun. Just like the good old days, when you didn’t have a care in the world. I kicked the ball back to the little boy as it rolled in my direction, I smiled softly at him as he yelled a thank-you and carried on playing.

I found myself on Annie’s parents’ street, I hadn’t been here since that day I walked away from her. One of the most stupidest things I have ever done in my life, I couldn’t help but think that she settled down with Eric, that they have a family now. It just pulled strings on my heart, and unnecessary jealousy. Maybe it wasn’t too late to apologise for my actions from last year, I should at least try right? I picked up the pace, and headed towards the direction of their house, before I could change my mind. When the house finally came into sight, my stomach began to knot up. I walked a few more steps until I came to their drive way, taking a deep breath I went up to the door, and rang the bell. It felt like forever until the door slowly opened revelling a stressed looking woman, which was Annie’s mom. She looked tired and overworked.

“Hello Mrs Roberts” I smiled.

“John? Wh-what are you doing here?” she asked worriedly. Why was she worried? I wasn’t going to mug her or anything…

“I came to kinda sort things out with you guys…” I replied.

“Look, John it’s best if you go-” she started before she was cut off.

“Mom whose at the door?” I heard her voice faintly. Annie was still living with her parents?

Mrs Roberts looked at me, and then sighed.
“I guess you better come in” she breathed before stepping to the side allowing me to walk into the hallway. She shut the door behind me, before she hurried into the living room. I followed Mrs Roberts slowly, and when I walked through the door that’s when I saw her. Annie. My heart broke at the sight of her, she looked weak, fragile and dead.