I Never Told You That I Can't Take Another Disappointment

“I like to imagine you smile when you hear my songs.”

I looked over while playing to see her mouthing the words. She knew this song? I shook my head and continued to strum. I had been to absorbed in my thoughts that I hadn’t seen Danny motion for me to sing one of the bridges.

I looked blankly at Danny unaware that I was supposed to be singing in a second. I watched as Danny pulled Alexandria onto the stage. Danny shouted,” This is our friend Alexandria!”

I didn’t notice she was right in-between him and I until she spoke in my ear,” He wants you to sing the next part.”

She warned me right as the part started so I went straight to the microphone.

“A letter home and I know we don't speak much
And we both know I'm not keen to but I think there's things I've left unsaid
I'm okay don't worry
I wish I'd been a better kid
I'm trying to slow down
I'm sorry for letting you down.”

I made sure I looked at Alexandria instead of looking down at the microphone stand like I usually do. Her eyes would switch from me to the floor, the crowd and the back again. I would hope with how much emotion I put in to that song, she noticed that I was sorry.

Alexandria:

I couldn’t help but stare at his eyes. I tried to look away as much as I could but it was like I was being hypnotized. I didn’t want to fall into the trap. I knew what he was trying to do but I wasn’t ready to accept an apology. There were so many things I didn't know.

I felt a heavy arm drape over my shoulders and I noticed that the song was over and Danny was putting all his weight on me. He laughed,” So many of you know that Reckless & Relentless is about working on our problems and it’s been brought to my attention that I’m a dick to gurls. So I brought Alexandria up here to prove to you that I’m not.”

I almost let out a chuckle as he takes a drink of some beer afterwards. I hope he knew that I barely remember how he was when I first met him, so if he asks me if he is an ass, I’m going to say I don’t know. I saw Zacky come into focus from side stage and he was smiling at me. I smiled back and he waved for me to join him backstage again.

I held my hand out for Danny to hand me the microphone. Once I got the microphone I proclaimed,” Why don’t you buy everyone here a drink? That’ll prove it to them.”

I handed him back the microphone and headed back to Zacky V who was holding out his hand for me to grab. Zacky smiled as we headed backstage together.

The lights were all dark when I ran to the drum set. I was nervous. But I was only nervous about not being as good as The Rev that the crowd would not adapt. I took a few deep breaths and adjusted to mic to where I could sing into it. I twisted my lucky drum sticks in my fingers waiting for the song to start. Finally the start of Nightmare rang through the speakers. I squinted and saw Johnny, Brian, and Zacky walk onto the stage.

I counted in my head to thirty four and then the lights flashed on as all guitars started to play and I made my first appearance as Avenged Sevenfold’s drummer. The crowd went crazy as Matt started to sing. The guys weren’t worried about having to slow down their tempos because I had already mastered their fast tempos.

Zacky smiled at me halfway through the song and I smiled back. I was having a blast and it was only one song in. After Nightmare ended Matt introduced me. Matt shouted,” So how do you think our drummer is doing!?”

The crowd screamed all over again. I couldn’t help but smile at the reaction. Matt explained,” Help us give a warm welcome to our drummer Lex Westbrook from London. Welcome to the family!”

Then I began to play the start of Welcome to the Family.

Almost two hours later I stepped off stage; drinking a water bottle. I felt someone grab my arm so I turned towards the pressure. It was Ben. He scratched his head,” I wanted to tell you that ya did great. You are a natural.”

I scoffed,” bet you wish you would have actually let me drum for you then huh? Actually don’t answer that.”

I walked away not wanting to know his answer because I had a feeling he’d tell me what I want to hear. I shook my head as I walked back to the tour bus.