Secret

Having to compete with Jon for the love of Tori was harder than I thought. Jon has always been the quiet one, living up to the nickname "Captain Serious". I thought I could get Tori in an instant, thinking Jon wouldn't have enough moves, or swag, if you insist. Sadly for me, Jon has always been a competitive guy, and he has made it clear to me that he won't give Tori up without a fight.

I decided to pay a surprise visit to Tori, hoping maybe I could score some extra brownie points. Walking up to the door of her apartment, I pulled the spare key out of a nearby light. It was Tori's secret hiding place in case she found herself without a key. Letting myself inside, I searched the apartment for Tori. She was ought of sight. I did however, find Natalie lying in bed with a word search.

"Hey Natalie, do you know where Tori is?" I asked.

"I'm not sure. She went out." Natalie responded, distracted by her word search.

"With Jon?" I asked as casually as I could.

"Possibly. She didn't tell me. Maybe she’s with Dan.” She replied.

"Why are you still in bed? Its almost three o’clock.” I glanced at the time on my phone.

"I’m hiding.” She shyly answered.

“You’re…hiding?” I asked, unsure of what she was hiding from.

“Yeah.” She replied in a bland tone.

“From what?” I continued to question her.

“Daniel.” She said, her eyes glued to her word search.

“Natalie, you can’t do this hiding thing forever. You know that, right? Your boyfriend and husband are teammates now and on top of that you’re living with his sister.” I informed her, hoping she would realize she needs to get her act together, and soon.

“I know that, Patrick. That is exactly why I am trying to enjoy myself before I am faced with having to deal with this big mess.” She replied, obviously annoyed.

“If you want to enjoy yourself, you should come out with Tori and I tonight, we’re meeting up with a bunch of people for a night out.” I suggested to her.

“Will Daniel be there?” She wrinkled her nose.

“We invited him, however, he politely declined. Brent will be there though.” I told her, hoping that would spark her interest, and thankfully, it did.

“Well…I guess I’ll go.” Natalie gave in to me.

“Great, I’ll see you tonight.” I winked to her before making my way to the door that lead to the exit of Tori’s apartment.



My days of security were numbered, and I knew it. I felt that if I kept low, maybe I could put it off. I was never one for confrontations, so the idea of having to divorce Daniel didn’t sound like a great one to me. The main reason as to why I have been hiding is because I know Daniel, and I know that when he finds out that I’m in Chicago, he won’t leave me alone. Well, that’s without acknowledging the fact that I am in a relationship with his teammate. I’m not sure what to expect anymore, to be honest.

When Patrick suggested that I went out tonight, I first thought it was an awful idea, but the more I thought about it, the better idea it sounded to me. I figured I should enjoy a night out before everything got even more stressful than before. I decided to look nice, so I wore a strapless high-low dress with a pair of black pumps that had sparkles on the heel. Tori came into my bathroom, dressed up as well.

“Ready to go?” She asked me, eager to leave.

“Yeah.” I smiled to her, before applying a layer of red lipstick.

“Fantastic, I assume it would be best if we took a cab?” She suggested, knowing we tended to get crazy when we drink.

“Yep, I’ll pay.” I offered.

“Thanks, Nat.” She said.

“Not a problem. Say, which Blackhawk are you planning on flirting with tonight?” I asked her as we made our way to the elevator.

“To be honest, I’m not quite sure. Can I have both?” She joked.

”Psh, You wish!” I joked back.

We spent the cab ride talking all about her date with Patrick a few days ago, and before I knew it, the cab driver pulled up to the bar. I paid the driver, and Tori and I got out of the cab. Upon entering the bar, I was definitely pleased with my choice of clothing. The bar had a very posh feel to it. The minute Tori got sight of one of her boys, she was gone in a flash. I looked over and saw Patrick doing everything in his nature to make him love her. I felt bad for the two boys, I knew in the end, one of them would end up heartbroken.

I found Brent talking to a teammate of his, and someone I assumed was his girlfriend. Making my way over, I flirtatiously poked him in the side.

“Hey babe, you look beautiful.” He grinned at me, before placing a gentle kiss on my lips.

“Thank you, darling.” I grinned back, before turning to face the others in the conversation.

“Natalie, this is my teammate, Niklas, and his wife, Julianna.” He said, directing his eyes to the couple.

“Niklas Hjalmarsson, I’m glad to finally meet you, Seabs won’t shut up about you.” He smiled to me, before shaking my hand. Brent’s cheeks turned red.

“Julianna Hjalmarsson, nice to meet you.” She greeted me in a happy voice.

The four of us talked for the longest time. They told me all about what their lives were like back in Sweden, and I told them about mine in Canada. I was having a great time, that was until an unexpected visitor came along.



A night out seemed like a good idea to me. I’ve spent the past few months sitting around at home waiting for something that's never coming back, and I wanted to get to know my new teammates. So far, all of my teammates are nice guys. They welcomed me into their team with open arms, and I was thankful for that, considering they were my enemies a few years ago during the Stanley Cup run.

When I first got to the bar, I spotted Tori right off the bat. I was going to say hello to her, but she was so busy talking to Patrick that I figured I would only be in her way. She seemed to be having a great time with him, they were laughing about something together and every so often Tori would put her hand on Patrick’s arm in one of those, “Oh, stop it! You are too funny!” ways that girls like to do. Looking over at Jonathan, he didn’t look quite as pleased as Patrick did.

“Hey man, what’s up?” I was shaken from my thoughts, when my new teammate, Steve Montador appeared. He was new to the team too, so it was nice to have someone just as out of place as I was.

“Not too much, I just got here.” I said back.
“Not too much either, just getting to know the teammates, you know?” He laughed slightly.

“Yes, I do. Can’t be the new guys forever, right?” I laughed back.

“Right. Wow, it seems as if we are some of the only single guys here tonight.” Steve said, acknowledging the room full of couples. Single.

“Yeah…single.” I said in an un enthusiastic tone.

“Check out Seabs’s girl. She’s a babe.” He added to me, ignoring my harsh reply. I glanced over to the woman he was talking about. Her back was faced to me, so I didn’t get to see her face. From behind, she looked a lot like Natalie. They had the same hair, and their bodies looked the same. This woman seemed to be the apple of Brent’s eye though. I met Brent a few times, and I thought he was a nice guy. He was lucky to have a girl that was like Natalie.

Steve and I continued to talk for some time, but it seemed I couldn’t stop glancing over every now and then to catch a glimpse at this mystery woman. At one point, however, Brent whispered something to the woman, and she laughed, turning to the side slightly. As soon as I looked up and saw her face, I couldn’t believe my eyes. It was Natalie.

Without a second thought, I marched straight over to her, furious. The second Natalie made eye contact with me, her face turned white and she began to choke on the drink she had pulled up to her lips. Brent immediately began to see if she was okay, rubbing his hand on her back. Without a thought, I began to speak.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” I spat at Brent.

“Um, helping my girlfriend?” He asked, clearly confused.

“Girlfriend?” I asked, incredulous. We had begun to attract attention from everyone around us. Tori looked upset.

“Um, yeah?” He still was confused.

“Well, that’s funny, because last time I checked, this was my wife.” The minute the word wife escaped my lips, everyone around went silent.

“Wife.” He repeated, then looked at Natalie.

“Um…yeah. We’re married. Sort of.” She quietly said.

“Natalie, a minute, please.” I commanded to her, before grabbing her arm, maybe a little too tight, and dragged her out of the bar. As soon as we were outside, she ripped her arm out of my grasp as fast as she could.

“What the fuck is going on?!” I yelled at her.

“I’m trying to move on!” She shouted back, defensively.

“By moving on, you mean disappearing for months, only to be found sleeping around with my team mates?!” I shot back at her.

“We aren’t sleeping around, Daniel! We are in a relationship!” She snarled.

“In a relationship?” I barked out a humorless laugh. “In a relationship? You are already in a relationship! With me!” I yelled, hoping to cover my pain.

“I left you, Daniel! You cheated on me! That isn’t a relationship if you-“ Without thinking, I cut Natalie off with a kiss. I absolutely furious, but I missed her so much, I couldn’t help myself. At first she resisted, but within a matter of seconds, she was kissing me back. I allowed myself to forget everything, and just enjoy the moment. For a second, I completely forgot that she had even left me in the first place. Just then, the bar door opened, and out came an angry, confused Brent. The minute she caught sight of him, she pulled away and slapped me across the cheek.

“What the fuck, Natalie?!” I asked, in shock she would do that.

“What the fuck is right. Care to give me an explanation, Natalie? Or is that not your real name?” He asked her, and immediately she looked down at the ground, letting out a huge sigh.

“Brent, I’m sorry, if you could just let me explain-“

”I’m not so sure I want to hear an explanation, Natalie. It wouldn’t make a difference, I just saw you two kissing. I trusted you. I thought we had something together, but I guess all that’s just bullshit now.” He said to her in a stone cold voice before storming off into the night.

Natalie sat down on a nearby bench, with her head in her hands. I stood there, watching, unsure of what I should do. A man stumbled out of the bar and sat next to Natalie. Natalie scooted away slightly, aware that this man would be trouble. The man slung an arm over Natalie, and she immediately stiffened.

“Hey, beautiful, why don’t we go back to my place for some fun?” The man slurred.

“No.” Natalie firmly said, trying to break free.

“Why not? Are you afraid of me?” The man asked, sliding a hand on her leg, under her dress, getting very close to her face.

Without thinking, I sprung into action. I forgot all about what she has done to me, and I began to play to protective husband role.

“Let go of her, now.” I warned the man.

“Why? So you can have her all to yourself? I don’t think so, man. Finders keepers.” The man still had has arm around Natalie. I ripped his arm off of her, and the man did not like that one bit.

“You wanna fight me? Let’s go!” The man was in my face now, and without better judgment, I punched the man right in the eye. He stumbled a bit, before holding his hands up in defeat and walking away.

“Thanks.” Natalie looked up at me, looking truly grateful I was there.

“Jesus, don’t you realize how badly that could have ended! You need to be more careful some times!” I worried out loud.

“I’m sorry, but how could I control that?!” She tried to defend herself. Grabbing her by the hand, I led her towards my car.

“What the fuck Daniel, where are you taking me?” She asked me.

“We’re going to talk, and then I’m going to take you home.” I stated. She immediately pulled back.

“Daniel, I don’t want to talk.” She stood in the middle of the street.

“Natalie, don’t put on a scene, just come with me.” I repeated.

“No.” She said.

“God damn it! Stop being so fucking stubborn! You aren’t a child anymore!” I yelled at her.

“Jesus Christ, alright! I’ll go with you!” She yelled back at me, before walking towards the passenger side of my car.



I sat in the car, allowing myself a moment to take a breath and try to cool down. Daniel put his keys in the ignition and started to drive.

“Buckle up.” He sternly ordered me. I rolled my eyes before putting my seatbelt on.

“Now, would you explain to me why you decided to leave with out telling me where you went?” Daniel asked me, his eyes fixed on the road.

“Because I didn’t want you to find me.” I replied.

“You didn’t want me to find you.” He repeated. “Well, Natalie. If you’re going to start a whole new life, maybe you should let me know, instead of having me sit around all day, worrying about whether you’re okay or not! While I’m sitting at home thinking about you, you’re out fucking random men!” He lashed out on me.

“At least I was sleeping with other people when it was over! Unlike you, who didn’t give two shits!” I retaliated back.

“I didn’t give two shits? Natalie, the least you could do is fucking send me divorce papers in the mail! All this time I’ve been wondering that maybe you would come back, maybe you needed time away! But no, you just didn’t want me finding you!” Daniel’s hands began to grip the steering wheel a little tighter now, and he began to accelerate the car.

“Daniel, slow down.” I ordered. He only sped up. “Daniel, I’m not joking! Cut it out, right now!”

”So, Natalie, how long were you planning on keeping this secret? Were you planning on staying married to me forever?” He asked me. He was only driving faster. He was beginning to frighten me, there was this tone in his voice, and he sounded crazy. He looked over at me slightly, and there was a look in his eyes. They were stone cold, yet they had a fire in them. I felt as if he was going to kill me.

“Daniel! You’re scaring me! Slow this car down now, or I will fucking jump out!” I threatened. He looked at me, then back at the road. He slowed down abruptly, and then pulled the car over. I immediately unbuckled my seatbelt and got out of the car and began walking away.

“Natalie! Where are you going!” Daniel shouted to me.

”Away.” I said, not taking the time to look back. Daniel got out of the car and began to chase after me.

“Natalie, I’m sorry I scared you like that, but we need to talk, okay?” He repeated again, this time in a normal voice. Reluctantly, I walked back into his car. Daniel got in on the drivers side, but this time we weren’t driving. I turned my body to face him, and he did the same. Well, the best he could with a steering wheel in the way. It was Daniel who spoke first.

“Natalie, why wouldn’t you just tell me where you went?” He asked me.

“I thought that if I told you, you would keep trying to get me to take you back, Daniel.” I replied, not sure if that was reasonable or not.

“Maybe I would have done that, but you can’t just pick up and leave like that. ” He said back to me.

“Daniel, you cheated on me, I had the right to leave!” I shot back, getting frustrated.

“You had the right to leave, you didn’t have the right to manipulate everyone for your own selfish reasons, or go around breaking other people’s hearts, and you most certainly didn’t have the right to run off like that! That’s the thing about you, Natalie! When something is broken, you never take the time to fix it! You just throw it away! We can fix our relationship, Natalie! You just won’t open your mind to it!” He shouted to me, in a desperate voice.

“We can’t fix this Daniel! It’s ruined, there’s nothing we can do anymore!” I shouted back to him.

“God, damn it! Natalie! You are always like this! You can’t ever confront problems! In a fight or flight situation, you always choose flight! You’ve been like this since the day I met you, Natalie. Stop running away from your problems!” He yelled at me, almost begging.

“I’m sorry, okay? I don’t know what to do anymore! My entire life has been shaken up, and I wish I knew what to do, but I don’t! I’m so sorry I left you like I did, I’m sorry I didn’t answer your calls, I’m sorry I started to date someone else! I’m sorry!” I tried my best apology before I started to cry slightly. They were tears of anger, frustration, embarrassment, everything. I quickly wiped them away and tried my best to stay strong.

Daniel didn’t say anything in return. He started up the car again, and he began to drive. We sat in the car together in awkward silence for at least twenty minutes, until we finally reached Tori’s apartment. Unbuckling myself from the passengers seat, I got out of the car and began to make my way to the entrance of the building. I heard a car door slam, and I looked up to see Dan following after me. He grabbed me by the waist and pulled me close to him, in a way that we were forced to make eye contact, only inches away from each other’s faces.

“Natalie. I know I messed up. I know you messed up, too. But I am not giving up on us yet. We have our ways to go, but please, just give it a chance.” He begged, before pulling me into a kiss. I kissed back, but I forced myself to pull away before things got any more intimate. Sparing him one more glance, I walked myself to the elevators. Once finally at the twenty-seventh floor, I walked to the apartment door, and turned my key in the lock. I immediately went towards the kitchen. I first went to the freezer, where I pulled a container of Chunky Monkey out of the fridge, and then to the liquor cabinet, where I grabbed a bottle of vodka.

Sitting down on the ground of the kitchen, I tried my best to drown out my sorrows. I was taken from my thoughts when my phone beeped.




I considered asking Tori to stay with me, but I was selfish enough as it was.