Crazy Girl

Sidney and I finally became close. We would hang out whenever I didn't have to work and my condition worsened. By my condition, I mean the fact that I may or may not be in love with him. I started to despise myself- and sometimes him- for loving him. It ruined everything. And it was so damn cliché it made my head hurt. I mean, the poor girl falls in love with the rich, famous hockey player? Things like this just didn't happen in real life.

I steadily became Sid's rock, though. I liked to tease him and say that I should charge him by the hour for his therapy sessions. But, in reality, my pathetic self was so happy to be spending time with him that I didn't care what we talked about.

"Elliot..." Sid said one night as we sat watching the Pens game. They were on the road and Sid wasn't traveling with them.

"Yeah, Sid?"

"Do you think I'm pathetic?" he asked quietly. I almost choked on the spaghetti I was eating.

"Pathetic? Sidney Crosby, what the hell are you going on about?"

He chuckled slightly, then sighed. "It's just... I'm 24 years old and my life is... hockey. Yeah, it's my dream and yeah, I love it. But I'm starting to think maybe hockey has made me sacrifice too much. And for what? To be sitting on the sidelines watching my team mates fight to get to the Cup without me, their Captain?”

I was silent for a minute, trying to think of what to say. Sidney was a hard person to give advice to because it seemed like no one, especially not me, could ever relate to what he goes through. I turned to sit criss-cross, facing him on the couch. He turned as well. The game was forgotten for the moment.

"It seems like a waste now, Sid. But it's just because you're not out there in action. You can't let this injury question your dedication to hockey. Yeah, you had to give up a lot to get here. But just remember the feeling you got when you held up that Cup. You gained too much to regret it all."

"You're right..." he said slowly, but I don't think he really even processed my words. He looked up suddenly, straight into my eyes, smiling like the sky had just opened up. "Wait a second! Elliot! I know exactly what to do!"

I giggled a bit at his absolutely ecstatic face. "And what is that?"

"I've missed out on so much! I missed almost every aspect of growing up because I had to do it so fast. But there's one thing that I missed that I can still get!"

At this point he was smiling so wide it looked like it hurt and I was suddenly getting a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach. This sounded very... un-Sid-ish. The only things Sidney Crosby ever worried about "getting" were goals, wins, and the Stanley Cup.

"I missed love. Everyone else has had a first love by my age, it's practically a fact! I've never even come close. Dating has always been so hard because of hockey.... but now, I have so much free time I don't know what to do with myself!"

I slowly felt my heart fall, inwardly laughing at the pure irony of the situation. Here was Sidney Crosby, a boy who always had too many things on his mind to worry about the trivial stuff, like girls, and suddenly, just as I begin to fall for him, he decides girls are worth his time. It was a testament to my absolute shit life.

"That... Wow, that sounds great, Sid." I mustered up all my strength just to get that sentence out without giving anything away. Sid smiled, turning back to the TV. We watched the game in silence for a while.

"Hey, Elliot?" he said. I looked at him to urge him on. He looked slightly nervous. "Do you think you could help me with it?"

Help him? Irrationally, I thought to myself that he was asking if I could be the one to show him love. I inwardly squealed. And then, looking at his hopeful face, I pushed aside the stupid thought and resigned myself to the fact that Sidney Crosby had just asked me to be his wingman.

"Of course, Sid."

And I just said yes.



"He asked you to help hook him up with a girl?" Dustin said incredulously as we sat in Starbucks. I nodded, sipping my latte. "Dude, that shit is fucked up."

"Right?!" I exclaimed, glad someone saw it. I had told Alli and she just rolled her eyes, saying it was my fault for agreeing to it.

"You were friend-zoned by Sid! Ha!" DJ laughed. I scowled.

"And here I thought we were besties," I mock-pouted. He leaned over the table and pushed my lips up into a smile with his fingers.

"Don't pout, it's not becoming, Elliot."

I snorted. "Like you can talk, Deej."

"Look, Sidney is an oblivious person when it comes to, you know, girls," he said, getting serious again. I rolled my eyes, nodding at the obviousness of this statement. "He's not gonna know you like him unless you shove it in his face."

"I'm not shoving myself in his face!" I practically shouted. Dustin stifled a chuckle, then glanced at something behind me and started to crack up.

"You're not shoving yourself in whose face?" Sidney asked as he walked up to us. My face burned so hot I thought my head would explode.

"I was just giving Ell some boy advice," DJ said mockingly. I scowled at him through my humiliation. Sid slid into the booth beside me and gave me a charming smile.

"You're taking advice from Jeffrey? You should have asked me," he said, stealing my coffee and taking a sip. I snatched it back, still scowling at DJ as he howled with laughter. "But hey, now we can both get dates. Maybe we can double!"

"Let's just focus on finding you a date first, Sid," I said, trying to keep the bitterness out of it. DJ had now stopped his incessant laughter. I gave him a helpless look.

"Yeah, sure. Be right back, I'm gonna order something."

He left and went to the counter. I glared at DJ. "Did you invite him here?!"

"Sorry, love. He asked if I wanted to hang out since we both didn't travel with the team."

"There's this word called no. You can use it whenever you want. This would've been a good time to use it, just fyi."

I looked over at Sidney and had to do a double-take when I saw him flirting with the barista. My face got redder, this time with anger. DJ looked too and then gave me an unreadable look.

"Look, Elliot, Sidney is my Captain and I usually like to stay true to him, but you're one of my best friends and so I'll tell you this: Sidney Crosby is not worth it. Yes, he's famous and talented and smart and funny and blah blah blah, everything else girls like. But hockey is Sidney's life. He may be unfocused on it now but soon he'll be back and no girl, especially you, should have to endure that. Sidney may not want to believe it, but for him, I don't think any girl will ever match up to hockey- not in the long run."

I just stared at him. I didn't want to believe that Sidney wasn't worth it because he was.... Sidney. But DJ made good points. Unfortunately, it really didn’t matter. You can't decide to just not like someone. I sighed. Sidney walked back over, a big smirk on his face.

"I got her number," he said proudly. I smiled at him.

"She looked nice," I said falsely. He nodded and proceeded to tell DJ and I the details of their conversation.

Thus began my journey as Sidney's wingman, or in other words, my journey of a million lies, starting with that one. Things couldn't be black and white, of course. I wanted Sid to be happy, but is it fair that I had to sacrifice my own happiness? Things stayed the same, Sidney and I were close and I helped him on his countless dates. Things were... bearable.

That is, until Emily came into the picture.