Dear God.

Jimmy just asked me if we could have a relationship, and as much as I
want to I can’t, I sighed, “I’m sorry Jimmy, I can’t. It’s bad enough
that I kissed you and I’m still dating Gaven and I just can’t up and
leave him.” There was hurt in his eyes, “How the hell can you do
this?! You kiss me and then say you can’t leave Gaven when it’s
obvious that you don’t want him anymore! Damn it Ash just be with me
instead of him!” I shook my head, “No Jimmy,” and walked away to my
car. I drove home and walked in the front door to find Gaven asleep on
the couch, I walked over and kissed his cheek. As I went to walk away
I felt his arms wrap around me and he pulled me back to him, “Sleep
down here with me, please hun?”

I smiled and sat down on the other end of the couch, “How was your
night?” He shrugged, “Would’ve been better if you were here with me
the whole time.” I sighed and smiled at him, “I’m sorry baby.” He
smiled back and pulled me close, “Tomorrow night can we go out to
dinner?” I thought about it and nodded, “Sure Gaven, whatever you
want.” He kissed me and pulled away, “Ok, I’ll see you in the
morning.” I smiled and slowly fell asleep on the couch next to Gaven.

* Dream *
”Jimmy! Leave him alone! He didn’t do anything!” Ashlyn screamed at
Jimmy as he continued to punch and kick Gaven, not letting up at all.
She ran over and grabbed his arm, “Stop!” Jimmy turned and looked at
her only for a moment, “Don’t fucking touch me! I’m not good enough
for you but this dick is! Ashlyn I bet he’s cheating on you! He
doesn’t see how lucky he is to have you in his life and all I can say
is I hope you realize that before it’s too late!” He shoved Gaven away
from and Ashlyn stood there in shock, when did he get to be so mean?
What happened to him? Is this…my fault?
Ashlyn sat by the waters edge outside of the house she lived in with
her parents and her older brother Johnny when he ran out to her,
“Ashlyn! Come on!” She jumped slightly, “What’s wrong Johnny?” As she
stood up her brother said words that almost broke her heart, “Jimmy’s
in the hospital, they think he’s dying!” She ran to the car with
Johnny, he drove her to the hospital and by the time they got there,
it was too late. As Ashlyn walked to his room, just to see him one
last time, Matt walked out of his room, his face was red and tear
stained, “Ashlyn, Jimmy wanted you to have this,” he handed her a
folded up piece of paper.
She looked at it and unfolded it and read;
Ashlyn,
I know this isn’t right, but I wanted you to know that Gaven never
deserved you. You could do so much better and I want you to think
about that, even though I’m gone I can still watch over you. I just
want you to know that I do love you and I always have, that’s why I
always cared about you and tried to protect you from everything that
ever threatened to hurt you, I love you Ash.
~Jimmy
* End*

I woke up, and looked around quickly, my breathing was heavy, I
grabbed my phone and sent Jimmy a text, Hey, are you alright??
About five minutes later he sent me a text back, Yeah, I’m
fine…why? I breathed a sigh of relief, I had a really fucked
up dream last night, sorry for bugging you.. I never got a reply,
by the time I looked at my phone it was already almost four o’clock in
the afternoon, I got up and quickly started to get ready for whatever
plans Gaven made for the night. It was around six when he called,
“Ash! Come on!” I walked down the stairs in my black dress and high
heels, he smiled and took my hand, “Ready?” I nodded, “Let’s go.” He
smiled and lead me out to the car, we got in and he drove to this
really fancy restaurant, “Gaven, this is almost too fancy.” He laughed
as we got out and he took my hand again, “Nothing is too fancy for
you, now come on.”

We walked inside and sat at our table, “This place is amazing!” He
smiled at me again, “I hoped you would like it, the foods really good
too.” We ordered and when the waiter brought our food back, it looked
delicious. After we were both finished Gaven smiled and took my hand, “Ash, I love you.” I smiled slightly, “I love you too…” He continued to smile as he got down on one knee in front of me and pulled out a little black box, “Ashlyn Rose Seward, I love you more than anything or anyone else in this entire world. We’ve been together since we were teenagers and now I want you to be mine forever, will you marry me?” I felt like almost everyone in the building was looking at us, I felt like my heart was beating from the inside of my chest, I looked down, just in time to see my phone light up. I picked it up and looked at the text that Jimmy had just sent me, I know it doesn’t mean much now, but I love you Ashlyn…don’t make any mistakes….<3 I sighed, looked back at Gaven and slowly shook my head, “I-I can’t marry you…because I’m in love with someone else Gaven…”