Dear God

Matt's POV

I was sitting in my livingroom watching 30 Minutes or Less. While Johnny was asleep on my lap, curled up around me. I was running one of my hands through his hair, while the other was wrapped around his waist.

I've been thinking ever since Brian and Zacky left. I always knew Val was no good. I only settled for her because the person I liked was in love with someone else. There's one thing no one knew about me, I'm bi-sexual. The person I like, yeah that's Johnny.

I always knew he liked Jimmy, but I thought it was wrong how he treated him when we were younger. I love Jim don't get me wrong, but I knew he didn't like Johnny like I do. He had his eyes set for Brian, who loved Zacky, who loved him back.

I still wonder if that's the reason he died, I wonder if he commited suicide and made it look like an accident. Right now, I couldn't stop thinking, that is until some little shorty gripped onto my shirt and started twitching.

"Johnny...Jay wake up." He moved around and then his eyes opened. "Hey sleeping beauty." He blushed and tried to get up, but I pulled him back down. "What happened? What time is it?" I smiled my dimpled smile. "Well after Val and Chelle walked off, Gena went to Brian's to get Chelle's stuff. She's gonna come back tomorrow for Val's. I think it's like six something. Are you hungry?"

He smiled kindly, "I could eat a freaking cow right now! I'll leave that for you big boy." THen he patted my rock hard stomach. "Holy shit man, you got abs of steal." I smirked and chuckled. I let him go, "Let's go to the diner down the street." He smiled and nodded his head. I went and slipped on my shoes while he did the same.

We left the house and walked down the street, since it was a nice day. As soon as we got inside we were greated by Harvey the owner, "Hey boys how ya doin?" I smiled, "Great thanks for asking, how bout you Harvey? How have you been?" He just nodded his head, "I've been okay, the same old same old."

His daughter Loraine came and took us to our usual booth. "What can I get you guys?" I looked at Johnny. "I'll have a sweet tea please." She looked at me, "I'll take a Coke, thanks." She left to get us our drinks. My phone then vibrated, it was Tom my laywer.

"Hello?"
"Hey Matt it's Tom I got your papers ready, is there somewher we can meet so you can sign them?" I smiled,
"Harvey's. Jay and I are down here." He chuckled,
"Should have known, well I'm on my way."

I shut my phone and smiled at a curious Jay. "Tom's coming with my divorce papers." He nodded his head. "Matt, I'm sorry for earlier. For being a cry baby-" I frowned and grabbed his hand, "Johnny listen, I don't care. I understand, it hurts like there is no tomorrow, like someone grabbed your heart and your wind pipe and squeezed. Val is a heartless bitch. I knew it from the begining, I just settled for her."

"Jay not a day goes by that I regret marrying her, and not confessing my love for the person I do love. Yet, I knew they wouldn't love me back, they loved someone else, who liked someone else, who liked another person, who loved them back. It's been a long day, can we just enjoy our food and me signing the divorce papers." He nodded his head.

Loraine came back finally with our drinks, "Sorry it took so long, Ma was having some problems with the machine. So, do you know what you guys want?" I nodded my head. "I'll have the bacon cheeseburger with a side of fries." She looked over to Johnny. "I'll have the chrispy chicken sandwhich with fries."

She nodded and walked off, just as Tom showed up. "Hey guys. So here are the papers, sign where the red flags are, initial where the green ones are and then I'll go deliver these to her myself." I siigned and initialed, as he kept talking. "She gets nothing, she has to sign another paper saying she has to keep her mouth shut about the band. Also, that she will be gave a course at the center up town about her angry towards gays."

I smiled and gave the papers back. "Thank you, and I might need a restraining order if she tries anything." He nodded and said his good bye as Loraine came back with our food.

*After eating and walking home*

We entered the house and took our shoes off. I walked into the livingroom and turned on the tv to search for a movie. Johnny walked in and sat next to me. I reached over and pulled him next to me, and had my arm around his shoulder. He smiled, I knew he likes being close to someone at all times.

I put on 'Media Goes to Jail'. Half way through there was a knock on my door. I got up and looked through the peep hole. It was Gena. I opened up, "Hey what's up?" She smiled, "I was gonna get her stuff tonight." I nodded, "Okay well Jay and I are in the livingroom." She rose one of her eyebrows, "He hasn't left?" I blushed, "No, we had dinner earlier, you know how it is Gee." She nodded and went upstairs to get Val's stuff.

Gena was like a little sister to me. She tells me almost everything, and like wise. I even told her about Johnny, that's why she stood up for all of us against Val. She really isn't a bad person. I walked back to the couch to find Johnny asleep. I picked him up and he wrapped his arms around my neck and legs around my waist.

I carried him up the stairs to my room. Gena looked up as I walked in. I laid Jay on my bed, but he kept hold of me, I sighed. I laid next to him and he clung to me. I kissed his forehead. Gena smiled and got the rest of Val's stuff. I mouthed, 'Thank you' to her. She nodded and turned the light off.

As I laid there playing with Johnny's hair I thought of what would come next. After the divorce, I would have no one left. Evntually I fell asleep holding my Jay.