We Only Breathe for so Long

LISETTE

White walls were surrounding me and it gave off a scent, which reminded me of blood. Everything was white and I was utterly sick of it. I sat down on the white bed and looked at the clock, hoping that it would reach four. I twirled my red hair around my fingers and waited.

I heard the door open with a creak and my head instantly turned to the sound. Jordan’s hair was pulled back into a ponytail but some brown strands were falling. She was holding a plastic bag full of… I don’t even want to know.

“Hey, Lissy!”

“Don’t call me that.” I said and carefully stepped down from my bed. “What did you bring this time?” She grinned and brought out a box.

“Taboo.” I rolled my eyes and watched her take it out completely and assemble it. I sat down on the floor, ignoring the cool surface. I looked at the box and realized that we needed four players.

“Jordan?”

“Shh, I’m busy.”

“But…”

“Didn’t I say that I’m—“

“We need four players.” Jordan stopped moving and turned her head towards me. She narrowed her eyes then glared at me. “I’m sorry but—“

“Great. Just great. Just when I was finally able to steal this from my friend!” I tried my best not to laugh since her reaction was quite funny. Her nose was all scrunched up and her blue eyes were burning with a passion of a thousand suns.

“Who’s your friend?” I was curious. She never told me anything about her friends, or her life. She only asks how I am and what I want. She started to fidget and her cheeks had a hint of red in it. Was she blushing?

“My best friend… who is a guy… I can’t tell you his name.” She stuttered. I gave a thoughtful nod and left it that way. If she can’t tell me his name then I suppose she has her own reasons.

“Alright. What’s our plan for today? Apparently, we can’t play Taboo anymore.” She sighed and looked around the room. She had her thinking face on. I pulled my knees closer and gently placed my chin on them. To be honest, I was quite jealous of my own sister. She had her life easy. She didn’t get to worry about blood transfusions, medical syringes and of course, the fact that you might not be able to see the next day.

I sighed and rocked back and forth while waiting for her to speak. Her eyebrows went up and she grinned. “How about we just make each other promises.”

“Why?” I asked, curious as to why she brought this up.

“Well, I’ve always wanted to make a promise with someone. In school, we call it a promise circle. Usually it takes three people but since it’s just the two of us, it’s fine. So are you up for it?” She anticipated my reaction so I nodded my head, which earned me another brilliant smile from my own twin sister.

“I promise to visit you everyday of my life and I promise to take care of you always.” She held up her hand like a proud sister and motioned for me to say my promise.

“And I promise to never hurt my dear sister and, to never steal the love of her life.” I winked at her and she just gave me a tomato-faced expression. I giggled and she just smacked my shoulder lightly like a warning. She then linked our arms together like a circle. I guess it meant that the promise can never be broken.

“Swear, Lissy, don’t ever tell anyone about this promise circle.” She had her serious face on and I just laughed.

“Yes, I promise, Jordan. So, did you bring any food?” It was her turn to laugh and she just nodded. She brought out a pack of strawberries, a vibrant red in a white room…

~~~

“Lisette, honey, wake up; we’re here.” I heard a voice speaking to me softly, trying to get me to wake up. She shook me gently and I opened my eyes slowly. I squinted as I was adjusting to the light, and I saw that we just landed. Everyone was struggling to get their bags in the overhead bin and was waiting for the doors of the plane to open. I fidgeted a bit and struggled to get up.

I got up and got my bag as well. The doors of the plane were opened shortly after, and we walked. The breeze felt light against my skin and slightly cool.

I’m actually back home. I’m actually back in Arizona.

We walked through the corridors of the Phoenix Sky Harbor International Airport and I couldn’t help but marvel at how clean their airport was. We claimed our luggage and headed out into blazing sun. I felt like my eyelids were burning. Woah.

“SNOW!” My mom and I turned around at the sound of her name being called. I saw the man wearing a white shirt and sleek black pants. He had his army boots on and a cap to go with it. I smiled at the thought of possible gun sessions with him.

“Stewart! It’s been a while!” My mom exclaimed as she hugged her brother. He pulled away from the hug and gave me a hug as well. It was a bit awkward but nonetheless familiar.

“Hey, Uncle Stew,” I smiled after. He grinned back and offered to carry some of our luggage.

“Your car’s parked over there,” he pointed to some place in the parking lot and we walked towards it. He put our luggage in the silver van we left behind in Tempe as we boarded it. He then got into the driver’s seat and after a few moments of groaning from the van, we pulled out of the parking space.

The distance from Phoenix to Tempe was only eleven kilometers, so basically home was not far from here. Uncle Stew said the drive to our house would only take half an hour so that meant I couldn’t sleep anymore.

“Have you had breakfast yet?” Uncle Stew asked me.

“Yeah, but I’m pretty hungry,” I said, chuckling. It was only about 9:30 AM here due to the time difference of Arizona and Philadelphia.

“In that case, we should just have early lunch,” Mom said. Sounds good to me. But wait.

“Uh, Mom? Isn’t our pantry and refrigerator empty or something?” I asked. We are “moving” here and isn’t the house supposed to be “empty”?

“Oh, I filled them up with food yesterday. Your mother gave me a shopping list before you guys left Philadelphia,” he chuckled.

The rest of the time, we drove in silence. I looked at the beautiful scenery that Arizona had to offer me. I saw a few cacti and some really nice houses. I guess I could get used to living in Arizona again. Eventually, we pulled over in front of a very familiar house that I haven’t seen for about five years. I stepped out of the car and stared at the great house.

Our house was about four hundred square meters big. It had a facade full of rough, beige bricks. It had two floors and a roof of small, brown bricks. Its large windows that had no grills were outlined by a dark, reddish-brown kind of shade. It had a porch and a front and back yard. Its door was on the right side of the house. It had a balcony too. Yeah, you could say that my house looks so brown and dull. It felt very home-y to me though, even if I hardly lived in it.

“Home sweet home, right, Lisette?” Mom elbowed me gently. Since when was she standing beside me? “We’ll take care of the bags, just unlock the front door for us.” She probably didn’t want me to carry the bags now that Uncle Stew was with us because something bad might happen to me again.

I nodded and got the keys from Uncle Stew and walked up the porch. I unlocked the door and took a breath of the house’s pine-like aroma before stepping inside.

I guess Uncle Stew put most of his time into fixing up the house since last week. It was already half filled with our old furniture; the other half of them remained at the condominium. Which reminds me, probably dad will take care of them and have it shipped to us when he’s not busy running the state of Philadelphia. We’ll probably need to sell some of them too.

I sat on the couch and watched Mom and Uncle Stew bring in all of the bags. Afterwards, I helped Uncle Stew prepare lunch as Mom started sorting out our stuff. He’s a pretty good chef himself.

We had our early lunch as Uncle Stew started talking about what he did to the house. Our lunch consisted of burgers and potato chips and I’ve got to say they’re better than those in restaurants. Apparently, he had every aspect of the house checked. Basically, he made sure the house suitable for us to live in. After we had lunch, Uncle Stew left and walked to his house (yes he walked), which was just a few blocks away.

For the rest of the day until around seven in the evening, we unpacked all of our things and got the house tidy. I also had to fix all of Jordan’s things and place them in her old room. I kept sighing whenever I saw a memento. It just feels lonely without her… and nostalgic. After dinner, I went to my room, and got ready for bed. The bed was so soft and comfortable; almost all my worries went away. Almost.

~~~

For some reason, I woke up at 6:00 am. As much as I wanted to go back to sleep, I just couldn’t. I looked out through the window and saw that it was drizzling. I gave a groan. I hate this bipolar weather. It might be a good time though to get familiar once again with the neighborhood. I dressed up into sweat pants and a shirt and left my mom a note in case. I grabbed a red umbrella and made my way out of the house and went for a walk, once again ignoring my old doctor’s advice.

The breeze was even cooler now; crisp, even. It sent tingles down my spine as I walked around. I looked at the features of each house I passed by. One was of a creamy white color, which reminded me of hospital rooms. I shivered and quickly walked past that house. Another had a beige colored facade with a grey roof, which I liked. I noticed there was a guy my age who was walking out of the door with an umbrella. He had brown hair which was all messed up (I blame the weather) and he wore some jeans and a black shirt. He looked up and saw me, but I shrugged and continue walking.

Moments later, I heard a voice calling to me.

"Jordan! Is that you?"

I stopped walking and looked back. There was the boy with brown hair and hazel eyes looking right at me. Who is this man? I glanced at him just to make sure I wasn’t hallucinating. No man this gorgeous would know a sick girl like me.

"It's me Kennedy! Don't you remember?" I held the umbrella tightly and squinted my eyes at him. My hair was all over my face since the wind picked up its speed. I racked my brain for any memory including this guy but the only thing that came to my mind was a broom, which is very unlikely. I decided to just be honest and get straight to the point.

"No. In fact, I don't remember you at all."