Breaking the Rules

“You know what I’m gonna ask you,” Max says calmly. I nod and sniffle in the last of the tears.

“I know, I know,” I whisper, rolling back into his shoulder to get comfortable. “F- Four years ago today, my-my-my brother and-and-and my dad. They d-d-died,” I choke out. I hide my face in my palms.

“I- I’m so sorry, Charlie.”

“I went to visit they’re grave this morning. I gave Andrew a hat. I hope it stays there…”

“A hat like Nath’s?”

“Yeah. He used to collect them. At fifteen, he had hats signed by skaters, actors, rock stars, and so on. Saving them on a shelf was his favorite thing to do. That’s why my mom doesn’t like them.”

“Your mom? I thought Mrs. Emery didn’t like them.”

Shoot. I did not just do that. No turning back now. “Can I tell you a secret?” I wait for him to nod, then proceed. “Mrs. Emery is my mom.”

“No way.”

“Yeah. I suppose the h-hats are too much for her still. She burned most of Andrew’s. But-but I saved a few.”

“Can I see?”

“Sure.” I stand up and walk to my closet, where I hid them for years. I have nine. I grab all of them and return to Max on the bed.

“This one he gave to me a week be-before,” I say holding up one. I explain the story behind each one and, although I know he doesn't really care that much, Max acts very intrigued.

“That’s all I ha-have,” I say a few more tears spilling away. Max wipes them for me and I smile widely.

“What do we do now?” he asks. I shrug quietly.

“You know what? I think you could use some sleep. Why don’t you go to bed and in the mornin' everything will be better,” he suggests. I don’t know if he realizes that if he leaves, I break down again.

“Stay?” I hope. He thinks for a second, then shakes his head no.

“Sorry sweetie, but I gotta call my fiancee about wedding stuff. I’ll bring in someone else though, alright?” When I nod, he bends down and kisses my head. I watch him leave, then fall onto my pillow. A couple minutes later, Nathan walks in.

Without a word, he lies down and curls around me. I smile and hide my head in his chest. He starts to hum a song and I’m already being pulled away by sleep. By the end of it, I’m out.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

When I wake, Nathan is gone. I huff a sigh because I know I should get up. I slowly make my way to the bathroom. I check my face for redness, then head on out.

Slowly. One step at a time. Jay is out and about, so he runs over when he sees me.

“Hey Charlie,” he says.

“Hey Jay.”

“What do you want to do today?”

“Sleep? Watch a movie?”

“Watch a movie then sleep?”

“Sure. What movie?”

“Let’s ask the boys.”

We make our way to the living room area. The boys are there, I think they are discussing lyrics. But I've never done it, so I’m not sure.

“Mates? Up for a movie?” he asks.

“Sure,” they agree.

“What movie?” Nathan asks.

“Anchorman?” Tom suggests. They all agree and we head to the media room.

I didn't watch the movie at all. For a while I thought about what my dad would say right now. “Charlie, be careful with those ruthless boys.” Or, “Charlotte. I want Andrew with you while you’re with them.”

Andrew would probably poke my gut and tease me. Then stuff his face with a load of popcorn. There were a couple lines in the movie that would almost set me off, because I could imagine how he would react.

The only thing I gathered form the movie was that Will Ferrell was in it. And that the boys loved it. But other than that, I have no idea.

“Did you like it?” Max asks when the movie finished.

“Yeah it was great,” I lie. “I love anything with Will Ferrell.”

“What do you guys wanna do now?” Siva asks.

“Nothing,” I say.

“Sleeping!” Jay exclaims running into his room. Max, Tom, and Siva follow in the same suit. Nathan stays behind with me.

“Are you gonna be alright?” he asks.

“Yeah. I’ll be fine,” I assure him.

“Do you want me to sleep with you tonight?” he asks not realizing what he just said. I raise an eyebrow at him and he chuckles, shaking his head. “Not like that.”

“It better not be like that.” I slap his arm playfully as I walk into my room. He follows even though I never said he could. I flip onto my bed and hide under my covers. The bed dips and Nathan slips just his head under. I quietly laugh. He rips the covers off, then slides under.

“Will the boys be mad at you?” I ask his chest, for that is what I can see.

“No, I think they’ll understand.”

“Good,” I mumble, falling asleep.