I'll Be There

I glared at the principal with disgusted content. What did he know. What did anybody know?! He sighed down dramatically at me, I could just see the hair falling off his wrinkled brow every time he glanced my way. I brushed the long black bangs out of my face, it was already fading back to light brown. I scowled and ripped out a piece, wincing as it stung my head. The principal stopped pacing and finally looked at me. “Honestly Raven, what am I going to do about you?” “Kill me.” I muttered, my right eye twitching as I stared defiantly at the stain on the carpet, pretending it was the cause of all the hatred I had in my life. I tugged on the sleeve of my dirty hoodie, scratching the skin that crawled underneath. The old dirtbag stared at me with his dust colored eyes and I forced myself to stop. I could imagine the wheels turning in his head, and my mind fogged up. He’s a liar, he’s inventing lies in his head, he’s going to toss me in the ward, he’s going to tell my scum parents that I’m a misfit criminal who should be in jail for life, he’s going to…going to…I started to scratch my arm again, digging my short nails into the fabric of my jacket.
“Honestly…you’re only 16…you’ve got your whole life ahead of you and you decide to waste it like this?” He held up the picture I drew in 6th period. My whole notebook actually. Man I hated the way he started every sentence with “honestly”, like he was fucking lying to me every other time he spoke. I admired my art. I’m not quite sure who the shadow was decapitating with his scythe, maybe an imitation of my parents, maybe the ghost figure of society, hell maybe it was myself. Either way I liked it. Then another thought came to mind, why the hell did he have my notebook anyway? I snatched it from his crinkled hands and shoved it in my bag. He gave me that defeated look again.
“Look, if I’m just here so you can criticize my self expression, then I’m leaving.” I stood up expectantly, and he waved his hand, facing the wall to avoid watching me leave. I saluted the bitch behind the desk as I left, giving her my signature I-Hate-You-Smirk before waltzing right out the front door of the school and heading down the street.
I headed to my usual hangout when I ditched, my dealer’s den. He let me in, already expecting me. At first he had a problem with me and my age, but cash shut him up real fast. He’s such a greedy jerk, getting a kid high just because he’s got a pocket full of cash for it. He didn’t even ask where the dough came from, he just took it. And I hated him for it. But then again, was I any better? I stared at the red marks on my translucent skin from where I had been scratching. Dozens of tiny holes lined the area, like perhaps I had fallen in a bees nest and they liked that one particular spot. I squinted as he did the dirty, but sighed as soon as the potent toxin entered my blood. What a rush! The colors in the dark shack were so much brighter, my life was so much happier. I yanked down the sleeve of my hoodie and handed him the green, flipping him off as I left, my usual goodbye.
I walked down the street, admiring the swirling colors in the clouds and the yellow birds that flew overhead, the blue dog that just ran past me and the babies face on the sun. Then I happened to look beside me at the names on the stores lining the street. There was a record store. I smiled joyously and bounced in, staring at the shelves of cd’s. I started looking around, Rap, Pop, R&B, Reggae, Classical, Rock, Metal. I browsed the last two extensively. While flipping through, looking for Slayer, I stumbled upon a very strange looking album cover. It looked like my art, there were notes and scribbles and all sorts of shit. On the cover were 2 very hot looking black haired guys and 1 blonde guy. Even more interesting was the title; The Heroin Diaries. I picked it up and read every song title. I glanced around me, seeing nobody else around, and stuck the cd in my pocket. I would’ve paid for it but I just gave Joe Blow all my cash. Then I quickly left the store and never went back.