Breach

Usually during times like this I insist on consuming as much alcohol as I can but for some reason I have no desire to drink. I look to Xavier, who is now staring at me with concern. I roll my eyes and try to play off how angry I am.

“It’s nothing,” I say to him. Even I can tell how unconvincing I sound yet I continue to try.

Xavier, as I knew he would, doesn’t believe me. “Did you call her?”

Him. Yes I did call him and we had a nice little chat. He obviously does not care for me as I do for him. Of course he doesn’t. Why would he? He’s a young teenage brat, a young male teenage brat who only thought that it’d be cool, or something, to be friends with a guy who is nearly in his thirties. I was in over my head. I should have known that.

I nod and keep my somber thoughts to myself. “Sure did.”

“And I’m assuming it didn’t go well,” Xavier says around a frown.

“It did not.” Nope, not at all. Saying it didn’t go well would be a bit of an understatement, don’t you think?

“And now you are going to drown in your sorrows and force me to drag your drunk ass back to your apartment?” Xavier asks and seems incredibly shocked to see me shake my head as my answer. Before he could ask I stood from my seat at the bar and spoke.

“I’m not in the mood. We can do this another time.” With that I leave. I may regret this later because my gut tells me Xavier won’t let this go but for now I don’t feel like talking.

Now I want to go home, do some work like I always do when my thoughts bug me in such a way and then eventually pass out from exhaustion.

I have every desire to go through with this brilliant plan of mine until I returned to my apartment to find the one person I did not want to see, especially not now.

Narrowing my eyes at the unwelcomed guest I spit through clenched teeth, “What are you doing here?”

“You said to come get my things,” the brat replies, eyes downcast to the floor. Good thing too, my glare right now can kill.

“I said to get them tomorrow so I wouldn’t have to see that mug of yours again. Didn’t I say I’d kick your ass if I did?” And oh how I want to go through with that threat. It’s at the top of my to do list now.

“I-I know but…but Antony can we talk?” Bishop asks with those big blue eyes that practically begged for my forgiveness. I snort at the expression and brush past the boy to my study in the back.

“No, get out before I call the cops.”

“Please!” Bishop shouts. By how close he sounds I assume that he’s following me. I take a seat at my desk and look for a moment over my shoulder to see that yes, he did follow me. He’s biting his lip as he looks at me. “I just want to talk, let me explain.”

“What is there to explain?” I reach for my briefcase but as my fingers grasp the handle another hand, more specifically Bishop’s hand, grasps my wrist. I glare daggers at the appendage. Slowly, I face upwards to Bishop who is staring down at me with tears brimming.

I sigh. “There’s nothing to explain Bishop. I get it. You’re tired of hanging out with an old man but I would have appreciated it if you had told me that upfront and not lead me around.”

“It’s not like that,” he says.

Of course he’d say that. I have an odd feeling that I have said that to someone before. I’m sure I have in the past. Hearing it makes me sick. I don’t want to listen to any excuses Bishop may have. Let’s get this “friendship,” or whatever you call it done with. I don’t know how much more I can handle it.

Suddenly my chair is being pushed from the desk. With the hand that Bishop is not holding I take hold of the arm and place my feet firmly against the ground to keep myself still. It’s too late though; Bishop already has me away from my work, my distraction and is now kneeling before me.

“What the hell are you doing?” I ask, confused.

“Apologizing…I’m seriously sorry about being an idiot these last few days-“

I scoff, idiot doesn’t begin to cover it. Bishop must have had a similar thought as I did because he chuckles and corrects himself.

“All right I’ve been more than an idiot. I’ve been a complete ass and I was confusing you…I was confusing myself too,” he says and sometime during his last few words a couple tears fell, seeing that makes some of my anger dissipate. I curse myself for feeling sorry now but Bishop…it’s always been hard to stay mad at him.

Bishop doesn’t let go of my wrist as he wipes his eyes with his other hand. He sniffles and chuckles once more, “What am I even doing? I don’t really know…when I heard you tell me to never see you again I just felt like a complete ass and like total shit, a scum bag. My feet kind of moved on their own and before I knew it I was here in your apartment and now we’re like this and I’m too scared to…to say what has been going on-“

“Bishop!” I shout, causing the trembling child to jolt with fear. He looks to me with wide eyes, like a deer caught in headlights. I laugh at the sight, part of me thinks it’s hilarious the way he’s acting so timid all of a sudden.

I have no idea where he’s headed but I can tell he is frightened to admit what’s really been going on. The hand that he had around my wrist I manage to take into my own. Bishop watches as I grasp it, squeeze it reassuringly and say, “Whatever it is you want to say…just say it.”

Bishop still seems petrified as he squeaks, “Don’t hate me for it.”

I roll my eyes. “I doubt it’s something worth hating you for.”

“I…” Bishop takes a sudden breath, a breath so deep that for a moment I expected his lungs to burst from the pressure. He lets it out slowly and trembles as he finally says the truth. “I l-like you Antony.”