I Don't Love You, Like I Did Yesterday

Lex's P.O.V.

About an hour later, everyone was eating and socializing around the party. My dad gave me a teary-eyed hug and short speech, telling Ronnie that he accepted him as his son. My brother soon said something similar, with the exception of adding an apology for calling my mother. It seemed that everyone here wished us nothing but the best, although only two or three even had an idea that I was pregnant. We had posed for what felt like thousands of pictures, probably not even being serious in more than half of them. Every now and then, Ronnie would look over from where he was conversating with someone and shoot a dazzling smile my way. I couldn't for the life of me remember why I had cold feet before I married this amazing man, but all I knew was that it had miraculously vanished and had been replaced with hope for the future. My husband looked over from where he was catching up with Max, and I smiled and waved at both of them. Max grinned like an idiot and looked at Ronnie, saying something along the lines of "she's hot, you lucked out." Ronnie in turn sent him a playful glare, elbowing him back before waving me over. I put up my index finger and mouthed 'in a few.' Before picking up the front on my dress and trotting over to the table where my band was, an empty chair in between Dylan and Jesse was conveniently left for me.

"Sup, fuckers?" I sat down and put my elbows on the table, leaning forward with a slight smile playing on my red stained lips.

"Amazing." Dylan muttered and sipped his bottle of beer. We all stared at him for a moment.

"Huh?" I raised an eyebrow and balanced my chin in my palm.

"That someone could look so nice... and still talk like a damn trucker." Mattie and Jesse laughed at his comment, I just glared at him from under my eyelashes.

"You think that's bad," Jesse raised his own bottle of beer and shot me a look. "you shoulda' seen us on the way here!" We broke out into laughter, with Mattie and Dyl trading looks at staring at us blankly.

"Weirdos." Mattie mumbled.

"Eh." I shrugged and smiled at Jesse. "At least we're not boring." Jesse nodded in agreement.

"Nope. Never a dull moment with mentally challenged people around." Dylan shook his head. I stuck my tounge out at him.

"Does everything that comes out of your mouth have to be incredibly offensive?" Jesse scolded him slightly.

"Dunno." Dylan shrugged his shoulders and leaned back in his chair. "Shouldn't you take my dick out of yours?"

Jesse immediately looked up and scowled at him. Mattie and I laughed at the idiots.

"Hey!" Dylan slammed his hands onto the table and shouted, catching our attention ... and of several other guests.

"You need to be medicated." I narrowed my eyes at my bassist.

"Remember that time we robbed that abandoned house around the corner from my house? Them pigs were on our asses!" He enthused.

I nodded and continued to squint at him. "Or maybe thrown in a river." I added. Jesse nodded.

"That was the night we got the idea to start the band!" He ignored our comments again.

"And the first time I grew the balls to talk to Lex." Mattie reached behind him and into the cooler for another beer and smiled at me. I returned the gesture, almost knowing exactly what he was thinking.

The day I realized that you'll always been around.

"What made ya remember that?" I reached out and took the bottle of water Mattie handed me. Jesse eyed me suspiciously from my right, probably wondering why I hadn't been drinking alcohol. I quickly looked over at Dylan waiting for him to reply before Jesse could question me.

"Jesse was telling me he saw the picture we all took on the couch on your bookcase back home that night." He smiled and let himself get lost in the memory. "I miss those days... when you first called me about the wedding, it made me start to think..."

He paused and shrugged subtly. He had all of our attention, my band was quiet; for once. I played with the ribbon on my dress, admiring the silk fabric on the beautiful gown as he continued. "We won't be able to have times like that anymore. We're all growin' up. And I don't want to... I don't want you to leave, Lex." He looked up and frowned, his gray eyes shining with sadness.

I felt overcome me and frowned as well, my eyes immediately soften and I felt Jesse's hand cover my right.

"I don't want to either." I mumbled, looking back at him with
teary eyes. "Part of me wants to stay back home forever with you guys. But... I'll always come back, I don't care where I'm at or who I'm with. If I'm needed back home, that's where I'll be. Ronnie already knows that, and if he didn't; he'd learn pretty soon." I felt Jesse's hand squeeze over mine and looked over to see Mattie smiling sadly at me. I sighed and closed my eyes.

"There's no other option. I feel crushed everytime I think of what I'm leaving behind," I reopened my eyes to look at all of them. "But then I remember: I'm not leaving anything behind at all." The guys looked confused, even slightly offended. "I'll always come home. Somebody reminded me of that." I glanced at Jesse and pulled my hand back.

"Of course. And we can always come out here, especially in the winter. Which brings me to my next point..." Mattie pursed his lips and sighed, then smiled at me. "I'm not goin' back to Philly."
I gasped slightly and the bottle of water in my hand slipped from my grip into the grass at my feet. I felt the tears I blinked back a few moments ago return full force, one even slipped down my cheek.

"W-what?" I exhaled shakily. I know it sounds a bit much, but there's only so much you can take at one time, you know? I was leaving home, expecting everything and everyone else to stay the same. Selfish, I know, but I had never taken to change; though it seemed that more and more of had been coming my way.

Mattie lit a cigarette and flicked the ash in the grass before exhaling and continuing.

"I figured it'll be fresh start for a little while. And, the house I'm lookin' at isn't far from Ronnie's at all. Just a hop, skip, and jump away." He shrugged. I narrowed my eyes at him and leaned forward, my tone causing him to cower back.

"No. I wanna know the real reason." Jesse muttered something along the lines of "calm down" but I kept up my staring contest.

"Fine." Married threw his arms up in defense and sighed. "My dad went back to Alabama, the guy we were rentin' the house from wants to sell it. It's not even permanent. I'm not buying a house out here. Just renting. I'll end up going home eventually, you should already know that."

My expression softened at his words. He had actually called it home.

Mattie never referred to Philly as home.

"You promise?" I asked hopefully, probably sounding like a kicked puppy.

"Promise." He replied with a sharp nod.

"And if you guys want," Mattie gestured to Jesse and Dylan. "Instead of goin' home right away, come crash with me for a little bit." They nodded, agreeing with him. I felt my heart rate slow considerably and relief washed over me. I had a hunch as to why he said it, but I didn't want to ask in front of our other two friends.

After people around us finished up their meals, I looked around and saw people were going up to Ronnie, bidding farewells and such.

"I gotta go say goodbye to everyone." I stood up and grabbed the front of my dress. "Come with me Mattie." I nodded across the large yard over to where my husband was still standing with Max. Mattie nodded and sat up before mock bowing in front of me.

"As you wish, m'lady." I smacked his chest playfully and waved behind us to Jesse and Dylan at the table. They just held their beers up to us as we walked away.

"Thank you." I muttered and looked down I walked beside him.

"For what?" He asked innocently and eyed me strangely.

"For spending some time out here. For offering to put dumb and dumber up for a little while." He laughed at my comment and put his hands in his pockets. "For being there for me as much as you have." I looked up, finally. He just smiled knowingly and glanced at me from the corner of his eye.

"Yeah, well... what're friends for?" A saw a faint blush tint his cheeks and be looked away, wavy brown hair falling in his face as we neared my husband.

"Hello beautiful." Ronnie kissed my temple and looped an arm around my shoulders, tugging my body against his and facing me towards Max.

"Max, this is Alexandria, my wife. Lex, this is-"

"-Max Green." I smiled at the man with the face of a young teenage boy and held out my somewhat tattooed arm to him to shake his hand. I was suprised when I was pulled into the shorter man's chest, his arms encircling me and rocking me back and forth.

"Hello Misses Radke." He grinned as we pulled away, brushing his hair out of his face.

"Hello Mr. Green." I grinned and leaned my head on Ronnie's shoulder.

"Dude, thank God you cut your damn hair. I seen and interview and it was past your shoulders and you didn't have any eyebrows." Ronnie grimaced. Max shrugged and pulled a pack of Marlboro's out his jacket. He offered me and Ronnie one, but we politely declined. He lit up one for himself and shrugged. I found it kind of rude that he hadn't offered Mattie one, or introduced himself for that matter, until I turned around to see that he had vanished.

I shook my head and sighed before turning back to the former bestfriends. Max ran a hand through his newly trimmed blackish/brown bangs and shrugged again.

"Drugs can really make you stupid shit. I'm happy I finally got clean and stable again. That shit was crazy." He ran his fingers over his eyebrows that had since grew back and I giggled slightly.

Ronnie sat down on a nearby bench, pulling me down with him so that my legs were draped over his lap, causing my dress to cover his own. Max sat beside us.

"You don't drink either?" Max asked. Ronnie laughed and I punched him in the arm.

"Yeah, I do." I nodded, Max didn't seem suprised.

"Smokes too." Ronnie muttered. "Speaking of which," He turned his head to face me, shaking his hair out of his amused brown eyes and pointing an accusing finger in my direction. I looked at Max, who shrugged innocently. "You tasted like cigarettes." I furrowed my eyebrows in confusion, honestly forgetting the Newport that Jesse had stuck in between my lips before the ceremony.

"Oh, I didn't even inhale." I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Just keeping up appearances." Ronnie just patted my thigh as a subtle apology. I leaned my back against the padded arm of the bench surrounded by the garden we sitting in. Guests were dancing to the soft music in the center of the beautiful yard. The sun was just starting to set, and my legs ached from the slow dancing Ronnie and I had done after he ceremony.

"Appearances?" Max inquired, stubbing his cigarette out in a small ashtray he had been holding. When the smoke drifted my way, I inhaled deeply and closed my eyes, longing for the taste of menthol and tobacco terribly. I found myself too lost to answer and let Ronnie nod in reply for me. When I opened my eyes I saw Ronnie gazing sympathetically at me.

"No drinking? No smoking? What? You pregnant?" Max chuckled.

"Uh..." My eyes went wide and Max's face dropped.

"Holy motherfucking shit. You're knocked up." Max's greenish blue eyes looked like they were gonna fall out of his head and it took a few moments for a Cheshire cat-worthy grin to creep across his pink lips before he took a deep breath and shouted.

"I'm gonna be an uncle! Holy m-" Max's cheering was cut short by my hands slapping over his mouth and around his shoulders after I had launched myself over Ronnie into him. He stared at me wide eyed, an arm around my so that I didn't fall.

"Do. Not. Tell. Anybody." I stated slowly, looking him right in the eyes before removing my hands. "Please?" I gave him the puppy dog eyes as Ronnie pulled me into his lap.

"Your secret's safe with Uncle Maxie." He grinned cheesily. Ronnie and I sighed audibly before relaxing and resuming our conversation... Or should I say him trying to convince us to know our secret children Max. I was smiling the entire time, happy that Max had gotten clean and Ronnie could talk to him man to man again.

Everything will fall into place soon enough.