Dark Dreams

“LEXI WERE HOME!!!”
I almost scream at the sound of the slamming door and the loud voices. Leroy gets behind me
“Mommy whats happing?”
“Shh…go up to the attic ok? Don’t make a sound or come down until I say the word ok?”
“Ok”
His tiny hoves climb up the woden steps, past my room and into the small attic. His tail knocks over a vase.
“Shit…”
“LEXI!!! COME DOWN HERE!”
I stumble down the stairs. My parents, sun burnt and orange. Waveing around flowers and there suit cases
“Were back from the cruise!! Did you miss us?”
“No…”
My dad have me a glare.
“Maybe next time we wont come back. Try taking care of yourself!!”
“I’ve been taking care of myself for 8 months! I though you guys said you’d be back in six!!”
“Yea I know, we stopped in vegas for a while!!”
I shake my head. Maybe they should have stayed.
“Ok…so why did you call me down?”
“Go unload the truck, we got a lot of stuff!! Hurry up twerp!”
I hate mother. Shes such a bitch to me…shes the reason hes gone. All over him bumping into her vanity set and it crashing all over the floor. Nothing broke it just got all mixed up. I unload the truck, my back in pain and my legs about to break. I run back up to my room, then to the attic. Leroy looks out the window.
“Mommy…who are they?”
“My mom and dad, but there very mean to mommy. Don’t pay attention to them, if you see them hide, ok?”
“Ok…but arent mommys and daddys going to love there kids?”
“Yes but, some parents don’t”
“Will you not love me?”
I grab Leroy and hug him, playing with his hair
“Of course Ill always love you!! Your everthing to me sweetie!! Same with your dad, we will never hurt you ok? Now don’t think llike that”
“Yes mommy”
“good, well your gonna be sleeping up here for now on…”
“But…”
“I know baby, you just have to ok? Ill spend all day with you ok? When they leave you can come out, no one can know about you remember?”
“Oh yea…”
Leroy’s sadness is clear. I hold him to my chest as he starts to cry
“Ok ok, we can go see daddy tonight, will that make you happy?”
“Yes!! Can me and daddy and you all have a party?”
“Oh you little stinker! Maybe one day, but not now, how about I make your daddy get you something instead?”
“Like a pony?”
“Yes you can have a pony at daddys house”
He smiled and hugged me, his tail flicking and his hoves digging into my legs, you get used to it after a while.
“We need to give you a bath tho, your furs getting dirty, did you brush it?”
He looks at his legs
“No…”
“Why not?”
“I didn’t feel like it”
“We need you clean honey”
Leroy’s feet nd everything below his belly button is covered in thick, black, hair. Not normal it looks like wolf hair, hes like one of those half man goat things, but it looks like wolf hair to me, I love him the same.. Hes so cute stomping around, his hoves are just the cutiest things to play with! My love for him will always stay no matter what happens. Leroy’s my son, my baby boy, even if he killed someone, I wouldn’t stop loving him. Days at school are longer then ever, I have to study super hard now to for the end of the year tests. Leroy’s been distane
“He’s been so sad, and I cant make it up to him, its like he wont let me…”
Loki rubs my back
“Hey it’s a hard time, hes not seeing his dad at all but maybe a few hours ever other night, your gone all day at school, you have that part time job at night now, on the weekends your parents force you to clean and do other stuff…he’s not around his parents and he needs to be. But its to hard for the both of us to be around him, “
“Yes…yes it is…”
Leroy sits alone in a red grassed medow, under one of the dead and black trees. I watch him look around and he sees us, Leroy turns back around and runs. It makes me sad that he wants to be so alone and unseen
“You know…we could fix all of this so easily…”
“How…?”
“Come live we Lexi…Leroy can have whatever he wants, and he gets to have both his parents, you wont be bullied or hurt in school or by your parents…please do it for Leroy”
He kisses my neck, nuzzling into it while his soft hair brushes my cheeks. His arms wrapped around my waist.
“How meny times am I going to tell you this?”
I flick him in the eyes
“I’m not living with you”
“Why not?!?!”
He raises his voice, I stand up
“Because I said so!!”
“But WHY!!! Its not fair!! You don’t even give me a good reason why you wont!!!”
“I don’t have to!!!’
His eyes rage, and mines do the same.
“YES YOU DO!! ITS NOT FUCKING FAIR THAT IM ALONE ALL FUCKING DAY!!”
“IM ALONE TO! YOU DON’T SEE ME CRYING ABOUT IT!!”
“BULLSHIT!!”
Loki stomps his foot into the ground, he makes his hands into fists.
“YOU HAVE LEROY! YOUR IN A HOME WITH YOUR PARENTS!”
“I HATE MY PARENTS!!! AND YOU KNOW IT!”
“THAT STILLDOESNT MEAN YOU ALONE!! YOU HAVE OUR SON ALL THE TIME, YOU HAVE OTHER PEOPLE, YOU HAVE FRIENDS IM ALONE, AND IVE BEEN ALONE FOR FUCKING 10,000 YEARS LEXI!!”
I lower my voice to a anger. A yell, not a scream.
“Loki you should know why I don’t wanna live with you!!”
“Oh really? Cuz I don’t know!! I’ll give you the fucking world Lexi!! If you havent already noticed, Ive risked my life for you, Ive risked my whole fucking world for you!!”
“Lier”
“No Im not!! You have NO CLUE what I have to do for you and Leroy!!!”
“Jesus you make it sound like a burden!! I’m the one working my ass off!!!”
“AND YOU WOULDN’T HAVE TO IF YOU JUST FUCKING MOVED IN WITH ME!!!”
“I WONT MOVE IN WITH YOU CUZ YOU’RE A ABUSING, EVIL, CRUEL, WOMAN BEATER!!! ALL YOU’VE DONE FOR YEARS IS RUIN MY LIFE! IV BEEN SLEEP DEPRIVED, IVE HAD MY WORST FREARS EAT ME ALIVE! YOU’VE BROKEN ALMOST EVERY BONE IN MY BODY AND YOU’VE FORCED ME TO LOSE ALMOST ALL OF MY BLOOD!!! I DIDN’T EVEN WANT A KID!!! I DIDN’T HAVE A CHOICE BUT TO HAVE HIM!! THAT’S WHY I DON’T WANT TO LIVE WITH YOU!! CUZ I KNOW FOR A FACT YOU’LL GO RIGHT BACK TO BEATING AND ABUSING ME LIKE BEFORE!!!!”
Loki’s eyes widen
“Yea don’t like it when I have to tell you the truth about yourself huh? You beat me everyday!! You killed the people I loved and care about!!”
His mouth drops. His eyes don’t contact mines, I look into his and see what hes staring at. I turn around and Leroy’s standing behind us, tears running down his face, a terrified look on his face.
“Oh no…” Loki whispers
Leroy’s holding onto the stuffed animal he asked for about a month ago. it’s a cute wolf one he saw in the store, he begged for that and now that’s his best friend.
“Leroy sweetie-”
“Daddy hurt mommy….and *sniff* mommy…hates…”
Leroy bursts into tears, throwing down his wolf and the paper he was holding. As each crayon hit the ground I watch as Leroy runs farther and farther away, his cries turn into screaming and sniffiling, It hurts me on the inside…I feel like my hearts gonna die hearing him cry like that, so loud, so sad and misrible.
“Leroy!!!” I call after him.
Loki picks up the paper, after a few seconds he throws it at me, and runs after Leroy. Tears of blood shed onto the ground, digging a hole into the earth. I look at the paper, breaking to my knees and into a crying panic.
“Oh god what have I done…”
The picture…under each picture of us was our names, reading on the back:
“Mommy and Daddy arnt happy…I think Mommy doesn’t like Daddy but Daddy loves Mommy so much!! I miss my parents!!! I want to see them both!!”
A heart with me on one side, Loki on the other, and Leroy in the middle, Leroy’s holding onto both broken sides, my side full of what looks to be blood and Loki’s tears. I sit in a tear full mess, I walk over to the tree just to cry even more. There must have been over a hundred pictures of the same thing. Loki and me crying, broken hearts, Leroy wrighting how sad he is to be here, how sad he is to not see us,how alone he is…Loki comes back. His face covered in his bloody tears.
“Look what you did….” he says to me
“….”
“He hates me!!”
“He has every right to!’
“He hate you!!”
Im stunned.
“He…said that?”
“Yep he fucking screaming into my face that he hates me, he hates you, and he hates his life, he hates himself, and his only real friend is ‘feather’”
“Feather?”
“That wolf!! Look what you did!!! Now our son fucking hates us all. You wanna know what else he said?? Do you??”
Loki’s so angry. We both are, were both hurt and sad, I’m horrified.
“He said he want to kill himself!!”
“What!?!?!”
“YOU FUCKED UP OUR SON!! HES A FUCKING DEPPRESSED CHILDED!!! ALL BECAUSE YOU REFUSED TO LIVE WITH ME OVER STUFF I HATE MYSELF EVER DAY ABOUT!!”
His screams stop and he vomits blood all over the stone floor. I grab my head and cry.
“Our son…Is fucking….ruined….hes not the boy I know and love…hes someone else now!!!”
“Ill move in then!!”
“Shut the fuck up Lexi! I don’t want you to anymore!! You have ruined any feelings Ive had for you!!”
“Excuse me? What are you saying Loki?!?”
“I fucking hate you! I resent you!! I DON’T LOVE YOU!!!”
My heart sinks. I wanna puke
“Loki you cant-”
“Lexi I don’t ever want to see you again!! I don’t ever want to touch you!! You fucking disgust me!!! You take and take and when someone asks one thing of you, one thing to make my our kid happy you refuse!!! I don’t even want to say our child!! Im so sick with you, get the hell out of my realm!!!”
“Loki you cant do this!!”
He grabs me by the neck and throws me to the ground when I try to touch him.
“GET OUT NOW!!!!”
“What about Leroy?!?”
“Did you not hear that kid?!?! HE HATES US BOTH!!!”
“HE’S STILL YOUR SON!”
“ILL SEE YOU WHEN I WANT TO!!! LEAVE!”
I wake up, Leroy runs up to his room in the attic, I hear him sob into his pillow and I do the same. Loki hates me…he hates me….and he’s been in love with me forever…I love Loki tho!!! Leroy…jesus christ what have I done?!?!