Messy Ending

Dai

Morning came and I had to wake up to face life. My phone informed me that I had six missed calls and ten text messages. All of the calls were from Ben, which I deleted immediately. Nine of the messages were from Ben, also deleted without reading them. The last message, and most recent, was from Sammi.





Tears welled in my eyes at how wonderful my best friend was. I gathered myself enough to reply to her text





I wiped the back of my hand over my red, sleep filled eyes before I reluctantly climbed out of my bed. Once I’d dressed in my ugly work uniform, I found Danny in the living room, lounging on the couch.

“Danny.” I managed to force a smile onto my lips.

The man’s head snapped up and he sat erect when he noticed me sanding in the doorway. “Dai. Hey… how… how are you?”

I stepped out further with a subtle shrug. “I don’t know.” I cast my eyes away and then gazed back at him. “Fucking terrible?” I let a small humorless laugh escape.

Danny frowned at me and patted the cushion beside him on the couch for me to sit. “I’m sorry, Dai,” he finally spoke when I sat beside him.

My brow furrowed and I tilted my head in confusion. “What? What do you have to be sorry for?”

Danny met my gaze. “Ben’s an idiot. I think everyone would agree that Ben is an idiot.” All of the muscles in my body tensed at just the mention of his name. “Though I did speak to him last night and I have to say he’s just broken. I don’t want you to think he doesn’t love you-“

“He doesn’t, Danny,” I interjected, springing to my feet. “How could he love me when I’m not even enough for him? When he feels that he has to have another on the side?”

“Dai, please sit down. I don’t want you to take this the wrong way. You’re like my little sister, but I’ve known Ben for years and he’s my brother.”

I sat down again, next to Danny. “I understand that Danny. Really, I do, but I want you to be on my side, I guess,” I murmured, moving my gaze downwards.

“Dai, I won’t take sides. I love you both and as I mentioned before, you’re like my sister.”

A small smile played over my lips. “And you’re like the cool, protective, older brother I never had,” I told him with a playful nudge. I glanced at the clock then and came to the realization that if I didn’t leave for work soon I’d be late. “I need to go Danny Boy,” I teased.

“Do you want my jacket? I know you used Ben’s jacket most of the time…” his voice trailed off awkwardly as I stood up.

“Sure, I mean if you don’t mind.”

“Of course not.” He tossed the bunched up plain black material at me, which I caught in both my hands.

“Thank you, Danny.” I leaned down to pull him into a tight hug and place a small kiss on his stubbly cheek. “I’ll see you after work.”

~~~

“Sam! Hey!” A huge grin crept across my face when I notice him walk into the diner with an entourage that included James and Cam. “What are you guys doing here?!” I called, careful to not disturbed the customers that were already seated and enjoying their food.

The boys headed in my direction. “Hey, Dai…” Sam sent me a crooked smile. “Danny told us what happened. I’ve never wanted to kill that shitface more,” he seethed and then clarified, “Ben, not Danny.”

“Oh.” My eyes dropped down to stare at the ugly shoes that went with my uniform. “Thanks, Sam,” I murmured. Though, I didn’t look up I knew Sam was pulling me in for a comforting hug when I felt the leather of his jacket engulf me. “Basically everybody knows now so they’ll be awkward in front of me?” I queried in a tiny voice as we pulled apart.

“Basically,” he reiterated, softly. “We came straight here after Danny called us. I… We wanted to know how you’re holding up. I know Ben meant a lot to you.”

Three scrutinizing faces stared back at me. “I…” My gaze wandered aimlessly around the diner. Finally, I shook my head. “Honestly, I’m not okay, but I’m still breathing. My heart’s still beating, just barely, but it’s beating.”

“Awh, love,” James spoke up in that adorable accent of his.

He too captured me in his embracing arms. “You guys are amazing,” I murmured into his shoulder. “You’re like the older brothers I never had, that’s including Danny,” I continued once James and I pulled apart.

Steph pushed open the door leading into the kitchen then. “Dai? Are you okay?” She scanned her eyes of the faces of the three boys standing with me. “It’s almost like you haven’t even been here all morning… you’re so distant today.”

“Uh…” I shoved my hands into the pockets of my apron as I debated whether or not to come out with it. I decided that I could tell Steph anything and went for it seconds later. “Ben and I broke up last night,” I told her, shamefully.

Steph’s eyes widened to the size of golf balls. “What? Why? What happened? You guys seemed so happy.” She pulled a chair up beside me and sat down.

“We were… I was, but then-“

“He had another girlfriend the entire time,” Sam interjected when I began to grope for the right way to convey the situation to Steph.

“Oh, sweetheart,” she soothed, rubbing her cool hand over my arm. “I’m sorry. He’s a giant douchebag.”

With a huge gulp, I nodded and left to assist a customer that’d just come into the diner. All I could think of was Ben and all I wanted to do was erase him from my mind completely.

~~~

Ben

I hadn’t left my bed all day. The energy wasn’t in me to do so; I’d lost all motivation to move. Eventually, when the chime of the doorbell rang throughout the house, I did climb out of bed to answer it.

“What are you doing here?” I muttered, maintaining a hostile tone.

“Brought some stuff of your stuff back.” Ali dumped a box of stuff, mostly clothes, at my feet. “And I came for some stuff I left here,” she informed me in a monotonous, aggressive voice.

I glared, not looking my ex-girlfriend in the eyes, as I let her pass by me.

In my room, she finally spoke again. “Why?” When I stared at her confused she continued, “Why did you do it, Ben? I thought you loved me, but while I was away with my sick dad you cheated on me.”

A sigh blew past my lips. “Don’t get me wrong, Ali, I loved you. I did, but I wasn’t in love with you. I met Dai on the last day of our tour in September and I just… I knew she was different. I fell completely in love with her. I don’t know how I’ll survive now that she’s gone,” I admitted all at once in one giant breath.

“And you couldn’t break up with me before you lost her?”

“I didn’t want to break up with you over the phone, especially while you were dealing with your dad. I was waiting until you got home so that I could do it in person.”

Her head tilted to the side as she surveyed me. “Hmmm… you really do love her. I can see it in your face, your eyes, your broken façade.” She nodded, chewing on her bottom lip. “I understand. I don’t like it, but I understand. I loved you… I still do, but life moves on. I want you to be happy and obviously I couldn’t make you happy. That girl, Dai or whatever, is the one that can make you happy.”

“She would make me happy if she even wanted me at all anymore.”

“Trust me, know you you’ll find some way to get her back.” Ali started toward the door. “Take care, Ben. Even if I never see you again I’ll always care for you. Bye.” With one last sad smile she exited the room with what little she’s left here in her arms.

Now that the terms I was on with Ali wasn’t too horrible, a tiny weight lifted off my chest, though the gigantic weight that was Dai still suffocated me and it hurt. I needed her more than I knew I did until I lost her.