Put Me Back Together

Emma's POV

I've haven't left the waiting room. Brian was in surgery right now and I didn't want to be anywhere, but here. Jimmy had just gotten released and his parents took him home. They also took Johnny home too. We all didn't want him missing School. He's a good kid, he just hangs out with the wrong crowd, which is us. Zack also has not let go of my hand which I'm thankful for. It's giving me support, but I also think it's helping him too. Sometimes I have no clue where I would be if it weren't for Zack. He really is my best friend.

A doctor walked in and my heart started to beat faster. I was praying that if it was about Brian, that it was something good. The doctor looked at Matt's Mom, "Mrs. Sanders, your son is ready to go home. Just please tell him no more alcohol until he's legal age."

She nodded, "I will, thank you."

The doctor looked at Brian SR, "Your son is still in surgery, I'll let you know when I know something." That made Sr sigh, which I knew he was getting agitated. Zack gave me a reassuring squeeze on my hand and I did the same to him.

A couple minutes passed and Matt walked in wearing the same clothes I last saw him in. My eyes examined him and he was limping a bit. I noticed some stitches on his forehead, a couple bruises, and a few cuts on his arms. His eyes met mine and I tensed up.

Zack knew I blamed Matt for this, so he grabbed my arm to restrain me from doing anything stupid. Matt took a few steps forward in my direction, "Emma.."

I yanked myself away from Zack and stood, "Don't ever talk to me again." I glared a hole into his eyes, before storming out of the waiting room. I didn't know where I was going, but I ended up going outside to sit on a bench.

Everything was getting to me and I just wanted it all to go away. There's always cutting. A tiny voice in my head reminded me and I shook my head furiously to lose that thought. I've gotten so far, I couldn't just give in so quickly. Brian would not approve of this. What I really wanted was Brian to be awake and tell me everything was going to be okay. I want him to be okay.

"Emma," A voice startled me and I turned around to see the person that I was angry with standing there.

I shook my head, trying to understand why he couldn't listen to me, "I told you to never talk to me again."

Matt took a deep breath before sighing, "Emma, you gotta give me a break. I didn't know we were going to get into a car accident. It wasn't even my fault. It was the other guy's fault."

"I don't care who's fault it was. All I care about is if Brian is going to be okay. He is the only thing that is on my mind right now. You were the one driving the car and you were drunk, so therefore you're the one to blame." I turned around abruptly and walked away from him.

Of course he grabbed my arm, "Wait-" I turned around and faced him with gritted teeth, "What? Are you going to apologize or something? I don't want to hear it-"

His lips crushing against mine cut me off. They were gentle and smooth, just like I remember them. He deepened the kiss and my mind finally realized what I was doing. I pulled away and he started to smile. I clenched my jaw before slapping him across the cheek, hard.

Matt groaned, "Fuck. Emma, c'mon. You kissed me back!"

"You're a fucking asshole! My boyfriend is getting surgery right now and you decide to go ahead and kiss me?!" I asked, extremely appalled.

He rubbed his cheek that I hit, "You obviously liked it, or you wouldn't of kissed back." I decided to just keep my mouth shut and this just made Matt go on, "Admit it, Emma. You still have feelings for me. I was your first love and you'll never get over me."

"I-" I didn't know how I felt. Everything is just too confusing right now. I can't even think straight. Matt stepped forward again and cupped my face. I tried to move away, but his hazel eyes gazed into mine and I remembered that same look he gave me the first day he met me. He leaned down and I closed my eyes. His lips met mine and I was still hesitant about it. He deepened the kiss and I let my body take over. My hands went to the back of his neck and his tongue went over my bottom lip, begging for entrance. On instinct, I let it happen. Once his tongue met mine, they battled for dominance.

"Emma-" I heard footsteps, then I heard, "What the fuck?!"

I pulled away from Matt and looked at the person and tensed up when I saw Zack looking at us, clearly not happy with what he just saw.

A sigh escaped my lips, "Zack, I can explain-"

He cut me off with a scoff, "You're unbelievable. I came out here to tell you that your boyfriend is out of surgery and he's asking for you, but then I find this? What the fuck, Emma? I thought you were better than this?" Zack was making me feel like complete shit.

I shook my head, "You don't understand. I don't-"

Again, he wouldn't even let me get a sentence in, "I don't understand? I think you don't understand that when you're in a relationship, you don't go around kissing people, especially your Ex."

Matt stepped in, "Baker, cool it." It was like he was trying to protect me, but I didn't want his protection. I was about to say something, but Zack glared at Matt, "You have a fucking girlfriend too!" Matt seemed to realize that and rubbed his face.

Zack took another look at me, "Have a nice time explaining this to Brian." He was about to walk away, but I stopped him, "You're not going to tell him, are you?"

He scoffed, "Of course, I am. I would be a horrible friend if I don't say anything. He already has a horrible girlfriend.." Ouch. That made me freeze and Zack gave me disgusted look before walking back inside the Hospital.

I couldn't move. I was too upset. Everything was crashing down on me, now. My life is going to change and I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to handle it.

"Zack won't say anything." Matt tried to 'reassure' me.

The anger in me starting rising and I turned around to face Matt. I clenching my hands into fists and walked right up to him. I took a swing and punched him right in his left eye as hard as I could.

This made him stumble back a bit, "Ow! What the hell is fucking wrong with you?! Now that Brian is going to find out that you kiss me, you have to take it out on me. It's not my fault!"

"Yes, it is! You kissed me!" I yelled at him.

He didn't even flinch, "And you kissed me back! Keep denying yourself, but sooner or later, you'll be back with who you belong with. You can't stay away from the one you love." Matt reached out and caressed my cheek before walking away.

I was left there alone and I felt like crap. I needed to get rid of this feeling that I had. The only way to do it was to talk to Brian. I walked back into the Hospital. Suzy caught me just as she was walking out of the waiting room. She told me Brian's room number and I headed towards it. There was a window and I saw Zack in there with him.

My heart sank, "Fuck.."

I decided to walk in anyways and my heart was racing as I did so. Brian was covered in cuts and bruises just like Jimmy and Matt, except he hand a bandage on his head too.

He looked up at me and just by the look on his face, I could tell Zack told him. The tears swelled up in my eyes and he turned to Zack, "Can you give us a minute alone?" Zack left the room no problem. I decided to talk another look at Brian and he was looking at me with anger and disappointment filled in his eyes.

A few tears rolled down my cheeks and I didn't bother to wipe them. I was afraid to know what Brian was going to say. Finally after a minute of silence, he spoke up, "How could you?"

"Brian-"

He cut me off, "No. I don't want to hear it. You know how I feel about cheating, especially when it's with someone that I don't specifically like. After everything we've been through, you can just go back to him, just like that?" Brian questioned, so confusedly.

I shook my head, "I don't want to be with him."

"Then why did you kiss him?!" His voice raised and it made me flinch. "I-" I couldn't give him a straight answer. The tears continued to flow freely and my heart was breaking.

Brian tightened his jaw, "We're done." A sob rose from my chest and I shook my head, refusing to believe what he had just said. He looked like he was on the verge of crying, but he refused to make eye contact with me.

"You can't. Please, just listen to me." I pleaded with him, but he didn't want to hear it. Brian pointed to the door, "Leave." I started crying and ran out of his room. I ran out of the Hospital entrance and just kept running until I couldn't anymore. I stopped at a bench and sat down on it. I rested my elbows on my legs while crying into my hands.

That was it, my life was over and my heart was broken. I didn't have anyone to blame this time. This one was all my fault.