Put Me Back Together

Emma's POV



Brian refused to acknowledge me at the hospital when I tried to talk to him. He still won't talk to me. Zack has been ignoring me through the whole period and even Johnny is a little sketchy about the whole subject. The only person I can count on is Jimmy. He seems to be my only friend.

I opened my eyes and looked at the clock on my end table. The numbers read 11am. A sigh escaped my lips as I sat up in my bed. Today was Saturday and I couldn't help, but wonder if Brian will even look at me today. I've been trying so hard, I just really need him back. I decided to head down the stairs where I found the guys with Brian in the living room. Brian recovered from the accident well. He just got his stitches out yesterday. Everyone was laughing and having a good time. This put a weight on my heart. I missed having fun with the guys.

Jimmy notices me, “Hey, c'mere.” I hesitate, but Jimmy waves his hand, encouraging me. I sighed deeply and walked over to them. Jimmy grabbed my hand and smiles at me, “How's my butter cup doing?”

I shrugged as a response and Jimmy noticed me glancing at Brian every so often. Brian had his gaze on the floor the entire time, which made me angry and sad all at the same time. Jimmy frowned, but then replaced it with a smile, “Hey why don't you come with us to the tattoo place? We're all getting another one. I bet you would look good with a rose or something?”

I bit my lip and carefully looked at the rest of the guys who were all looking at Jimmy like he was crazy. I finally met Brian's eyes, who was glaring a hole right into my head. I couldn't help, but let my emotions get the best of me. Tears rose in my eyes and I looked back at Jimmy, “No that's okay. I'll text you later Jimmy.” I rushed out of the room quickly, but I could still hear Jimmy scolding the guys.

A sigh escaped my lips as I tried to keep myself under control. I grabbed my jacket off of the kitchen chair. Suzy, who was standing behind the counter, looked up at me, “Honey, what's wrong?”

“Nothing, just need some air.” I said in a rushed tone while rushing out of the house in a blur. I started running and I knew exactly where I was going. The spot. It has helped me so much over the past couple years. Once I was in the grassy area, I sat down on my butt. Everything came out so fast. Tears were pouring down my cheeks and a sob escaped up from my chest and out my mouth. I cried until I had nothing left.

Things were becoming clear now. I was never going to get Brian back. Not even my friends. I'll always have Jimmy, but I can't count on him to bail on his friends like that. I wouldn't want him to do that. I felt my phone vibrate in my jacket pocket. I pulled it out to see that I had a text message from Jimmy.

From Jimmy:

I'm sorry about them. Give em' some time. Tonight you and I have a date with Jacob's Ladder. (;

Even through the tears I still managed to let a chuckle out. Jimmy was always so obsessed with that movie. I texted him back saying 'deal' and I started to feel a little better. Tonight, I'm going to talk to Jimmy. Tell him how I feel right now. He'll know what to do. He always does.

I've been here for a while, so I decided to head back to the house. As soon as I got onto the path, somebody bumped into me.

“Watch it, loser!”

I looked up to see the blonde haired bimbo, that I've always had trouble with, Marissa staring down at me. I've had some bad history with her, mainly because of Matt. I rolled my eyes, “You bumped into me.”

Marissa scoffed, “Whatever. At least I have a boyfriend.”

Again, I rolled my eyes. She was trying to get under my skin.

Marissa chuckled deep in her throat, “What? Jealous? Ever since you came back, you've just proved how much a slut you really are. First you get with Haner, then back with Matt? Oh and now I hear you're trying to get in Sullivan's pants as well. Boy, you just don't when to quit do you?”

I narrowed my gaze, “Are you done now?”

She rolled her eyes, “What? Not going to stick up for yourself? Oh that's right, you usually have your 'guys' to back you up, but now you're all alone. Face it, Emma. No one cares about you. Nobody likes you! Do us all a favor-”

I couldn't take it any longer. I raised my hand that was now a fist and decked her right in the eye. Marissa fell to her feet and covered her eye, “You fucking bitch! You're going to pay for this!” I shrugged, not really caring of what she was saying. I decided to continue on home.

Marissa screeched at me, “I mean it, Emma! You're going to regret ever living!” Somehow I couldn't feel scared or frightened. I was already feeling like shit, so that didn't really effect me.



It was going on midnight and I was currently cuddling with Jimmy on my bed, while the end credits of Jacob's Ladder were coming on. Jimmy sat up and sighed, “Alright, what's on your mind?” He knew me so well.

I took a deep breath and sighed, “I don't know where to start.”

“Where did you go earlier today?”

That's a start. I rubbed my face while saying, “The spot, I sat there for about 30 minutes and just cried. It helped, but not so much.”

Jimmy pulled me into a an embrace, “I'm so sorry, butter cup. I've tried talking to Brian, I really have. He's just stubborn.”

I sighed and nodded. That was true, I knew how stubborn he is, but I don't think there's any hope for us anymore. I bit my lip, to make sure no tears escaped, “I know. I think it's really over, Jimmy.”

“Emma, don't say that.” He tightened his arms around me, a comforting motion.

I returned it the best way I could, “Jimmy, it's true. Brian won't even look at me. Zack won't talk to me and Johnny barely says 2 words to me. Now I have Marissa wanting to kill me.”

“Wait, what?” Jimmy let go and gave me a questioning gaze.

This made me nod, “Yeah, I bumped into her on the pathway. She said some crazy shit and she went a little too far, so I punched her. She then said that I will regret ever living.”

Jimmy put a hand on my shoulder, “She won't do anything. If she does, I'll knock her out.” Again, I just nod as a response. I really don't care what she plans on doing or if she even does anything. The only thing on my mind right now is Brian.

Jimmy wrapped his arm around me, “He'll come around, Emma.” He tried to reassure me. I can feel the tears threatening to spill again, “I don't think so Jimmy. Not this time. I hurt him too bad, but I think I'm hurting as much as him.”

He shook his head, like he was trying to protest, but I looked up into his crystal blue eyes and said, "I've lost him."