Under a Paper Moon

What happened last night? I fucked Simon. That's what happened last night. Yes I was drunk and no I wouldn't of done it if I was sober but that's not excuse. Its never an excuse to cheat. Oh my god.

My poor Gustav, I'm such a prick. Oh my god, he can't know about this. He can't, it will tear him apart. Then blame himself for the whole thing. He's so insecure about himself, he's always worried I'm going to leave him because of the way he looks. Thinks ill find someone better then him. Oh yeah because this will give him a giant confidence booster. Fucking hell.

Simon was sitting up in which I am guessing is his bed, looking at me with a worried look in his eyes. Then I remembered I still hadn't replied to him. Oops.

'Hi Si.. Um no offence or anything but what exactly happened last night?'

Good. Because knowing will really help. Hey we could of not cheated right? And just ended up naked? Somehow?

Oh my god and Simon likes me too. What if he thinks, that I like him? Was he even drunk last night? I can't even remember, but I think I made the first move.

'Oh um we had sex yesterday, you were pretty drunk and kissed me, things just escalated from there' he whispered not looking me in the eyes.

Fucking hell. So I did start it. I feel horrible, not just because of breaking poor Gustav's heart but also because of my bloody hangover. Who put a drum inside my head?

As if he could read my mind, Simon tapped me on the shoulder with two white small pills in his hand offering them to me. He's so cute I swear. Not in that way. No no no. I'm not helping myself am I?

'Thanks Si' I gave him a small smile.

Then I remembered something Ben told me last night, Simon likes me oh god. Right so you've managed to cheat on your boyfriend and now you've got to reject Simon.

Unless you like him? Then you could probably try and see them both? No. Fraser are you stupid? You can't do that. You don't even like him like that. Oh and Simon has Max. Jesus. What have I done?

~Time Lapse~

'Fraser?'
I looked up from my phone to see John waiting for me to reply.

The only reason I was looking at my phone was because Gustav hasn't phoned or at least texted me since Friday night and it was now Monday morning.

At least I get to see him today? Just do not mention what happened it will all be okay.

'Yeah? Um John have you heard from Gustav over this weekend? Because he hasn't phoned me at all and he said he would.'

Out of the corner of my eye I saw my own brother give me a death glare. Oh god what have I done now?

'I have actually. On Sunday morning, Ben got a phonecall from what I can only say was a hysterical Gustav, crying down the phone. Know anything about that?'

Oh shit. My baby Gustav, what happened to him? Unless. No he can't have found out?

I swallowed loudly. Not daring to look John in the eyes as if he could find out what happened.
I shook my head, in response.

'His cousin told me what happened as Gustav was crying to much to tell us.'

He was crying to much? Oh Gustav, my baby. I'm such a prick I swear. Your meant to protect him from getting hurt not hurt him you idiot.

'What happened?'

'You fucking broke his heart that's what.'
He hissed, storming off towards our school leaving me with my guilt. I deserve it though.

Oh shit. So Gustav does know. Oh my god, I have to see him and tell him everything. Make it up to him, tell him I love him because I do. How cheesy but its true I do. He thought I was cheating before and now, oh god.

Fraser you should think with your head and not with your dick. I wouldn't be surprised if he hates me.

Oh look where I am. School. Brilliant, time to go beg for my forgiveness for being an absolute douchebag.