Life Like This

Lagging my suitcase behind me, I took my first step into the Arizona’s humid air. The sun’s warm rays kissed my barren skin. Wiping the sweat off my forehead, I slipped on my ray-bands and slid down onto the cool concrete.

Awaiting my ride, I tossed my shoes to the side and pulled out a lighter and cigarette. Holding the cigarette up to my mouth the lighter flickered to life. I inhaled a long breath and exhaled sharply letting my eyes shut.

Engines began to start and make its way out of the nearly vacant parking lot, luggage being hauled around; wheels squeaking with every push and pull, children crying for their mother’s attention, and flight numbers being announced over the intercom.

Letting the breeze run through my lightly curled hair, I let my body relax and meld with the cool concrete. I could hear foot steps heading towards my direction, shoes scuffed against the ground. The foot steps began to slow down and came to a halt beside me.

Not bothering to open my eyes, I flicked the end of the cigarette with my thumb and inhaled another breath; I could feel my body begin to ease and every muscle in my body begin to loosen.

“You know, those aren’t good for you.” A guy’s voice came from beside me.

Keeping my eyes shut, I nodded and grinned. “I kind of figured.”

He chuckled and crouched down next to me, I could smell the sweat scent of after shave and a mix of cologne. “Well then, kind enough to spare me one?”

My eyes calmly shot open and turned my head to my right. Before me stood a tall lanky frame, bleach blond hair, nose and lip piercing, and—and gauges. I began to loose myself him his coral green eyes as it glistened in the sun. His hair fell softly against his perfectly tan face, leaving me to stare on, and on, and on. Dazed for days.

Tearing my eyes off him, I reached into my bag and pulled out a box of Camels and a lighter I got in Vegas. “Thanks.” He mumbled taking them from me.

“You know…those aren’t good for you.” I said sarcastically.

He smirked and tossed the lighter at me. “Well…I guess you gotta do some things in life to make you realize you’re just hurting yourself and no one but yourself,” He flicked the ashes to the ground. “And one day you’d come to realize what a goddamn idiot you are and mentally slap yourself.”

I sighed and crushed my cigarette against the brick wall. I adjusted my sunglasses so they sat on the bride of my nose. “And this is just one of those things.” I pointed to the cigarette in his hand.

He nodded and looked out into the open parking lot. “Indeed.” After a moment of comfortable silence, he turned to me and stuck out his hand. “I’m Joel—Joel Kaintz.”

I nodded and extended my hand, “Ashleigh Kenly.”

“Well Ashley Kenly, what are you planning on doing on such a beautiful day?” He asked, crushing the last of his cigarette.

“Well Joel, I’m waiting for my ride to come and pick and up. Taking me to where I’ll be calling home for the summer.” I looked at my phone and sighed. “Who is now, exactly 45 minutes late.”

He nodded and grinned. “Awe, I knew you didn’t look like you’re from here. So where’re you from?”

“Seattle Washington, home of the Seahawks.” I smiled hearing myself say thing, my father would have been proud to hear me say so.

“Ah, the state of trees, rain, and babes.” He said with a smirk, I cocked an eye brow at him and laughed.

“Funny…What about you? Where are you from?”

“Right here, Tempe Arizona; born and raised.” Joel said proudly, letting out a huge smile revealing his purl white teeth.

We both just stared out into nowhere, but I couldn’t help to sneak a couple of glances from the corner of my eyes. Thank goodness for my sunglasses.

He turned to me ready to say something when I car came to a screeching halt before Joel and I. The passenger door swung open and out came a petite middle-aged woman, averaging about no taller then 5”2’. She had dressed up in a white dress shirt and a black pencil skirt, paired with navy blue heels.

Getting up from the ground and straightening my shirt, I started to walk towards here.

“Ashleigh!” She shrieked.

I plastered a fake smile on my face and removed my sunglasses. “Jenny!” I said enthusiastically as possible.

“Oh my god, you’ve grown up so much! It’s been what 5 years now? You look wonderful, doesn’t she look wonderful Jay?” She turned to her husband who I hadn’t noticed at first. He just nodded and looked away feeling uncomfortable. “And I hope you didn’t mine that we were running a little late. I’m so sorry; we got stuck in major traffic!”

I was trying to process everything she was saying to me at once, but it all just was thrown at me way too fast. “Uh yeah it’s okay; I had company to keep me occupied.” I turned to Joel and gave him a smile.

“Okay enough of this standing around, you must be exhausted! How ‘bout we get you home and situated? Jay can you grab her bag?” Jay walked over and lifted my suitcase and placed it into the trunk.

She started to bombard me with these entire questions which all seemed to be rhetorical. I just stood there and looked at her as if she had two heads.

Jenny started to get into the car when she noticed I wasn’t moving. “Is everything alright hun?”

I shook me head and grabbed my bag. “Yeah everything’s okay, just give me a sec.” I turned back and walked back to Joel. He was now standing up with his hands in his pocket.

Reaching into my bag a pulled out a pen, “It was nice meeting you Joel.” I said as a grabbed his hand. “Hope to see you around sometime.” I scribbled down my number onto his hand.

“Yeah see you some time.” He smiled widely and waved as I walked back to the car.

&&&

“So here we are!” Jenny announced as we drove up to a badge colored house. It was an average home in Arizona, small garden, clay walls, and swimming pool in the back.

I hesitantly unbuckled my seatbelt and exited the car. Jay had already gone inside with my suitcase leaving Jenny and I behind. Jenny excitedly grabbed my hand and dragged me into the house.

Walking into the house my body froze and I went into some kind of shock. Everything looked the same, the walls were still covered with family portraits, the TV stand was still clustered with video games, and the house still smelt like baked good. This brought me back to where things used to be. Fun-filled summers, no drama, no fighting, just adventure.

“Wow, nothing’s changed has it?” I asked quietly, eyes gazing around.

“Nope not one bit.” She replied as I looked around. “It’s been awhile hasn’t it?” I nodded as shivers ran throughout my body. “Well you’ve got plenty of time to look around right? The whole summer…”

“Yeah, the whole summer,” She started squeeze my shoulders trying to get me to relax.

“How ‘bout I show you to your room? After that be can have dinner and catch up a bit.”

I nodded and offered her a weak smile. I followed her up the stairs and down the hall. She opened the door furthest away from the master suite, which I guessed was going to be my room.

I stepped in and dead center in the room was a king sized bed with mounds of pillows trying to escape from under the covers. Around the room were covered with shelves of books, thousands of them, neatly organized. My eyes immediately met the large window behind the bed, a beautiful view of the lake, the water glistening under the sun.

Looking out the window brought back a lot of un-wanted memories, painful childhood memories that have been lost through the past couple of years.

“Wow,” I mumbled walking across the room taking a seat on the bed.

“You like it?” She asked taking a seat next to me.

“Like it? I love it! You didn’t have to do this all for me Jenny.”

She shook her head held onto my hands. “Well it’s the least I could do after—well you deserve it.”

I smiled and gripped her hands. “Thank you, thank you so much.”

“Oh it’s nothing sweetie, it’s just a room overly decorated.”

I shook my head and looked at her dead in the eye. “No, I mean thank you…for letting me stay here. After what has gone on for the last month or two. I-It—thank you Jenny I really owe you one.”

He face softened and pulled me into a hug. I let my body relax and allowed her to hold me, comfort me, burry the existing pain. “I know it’s hard right now, and the next couple of months won’t be so easy, but I guarantee after some time everything will go back to normal.” She started to stroke my hair and my back. “Everything’s going to be okay, I promise.”

“I-I just miss them so much Jenny.” I began to sob into her shoulder.

“I know you do sweetie, I know you do.” She cooed softly.

After what seemed like eternity, I stopped sobbing into Jenny’s shoulder and was just left with small whimpers. I whipped the remaining tears from my face and sighed loudly.

“God, I’m so sorry for breaking down on you like that. It’s hasn’t even been a full hour yet…I feel so bad.” I began to trail off when she grabbed my hand again.

“Ashleigh honey, it’s fine. I kinda like this; you know I don’t ever get these one-on-one girl talks around the house. That’s what I get for having three boys!” I laughed and wiped my nose with the back of my hand.

“Well for the whole summer, expect some more of these ‘girl talks’ cause I don’t think I’ll be able to hold all these emotions in any longer.”

“Oh it’s on, lay it all on me; I’ll be all ears.” She cheerfully said, getting up to her feet.

“Again thank you Jenny, really.”

She smiled and kissed the top of me head. “I know sweetie and thank you also, for agreeing to spend the summer her with me and my family.” She clapped her hands together and spun around. “So how ‘bout some dinner, pizza sounds good to you?”

“Oh, anything that’s food right now sounds good to me. Crying can really take a toll on you.” I said getting up from the bed also.

“Hmm, just wait for what I have planned for the whole week. I was going to have steak tonight but John’s friends are coming over also, so it’s just easier to feed everybody pizza.”

I nodded intently…John. It’s been awhile since I’ve heard that name.

“Honey I’m home.” I guys voice came from downstairs, who clearly wasn’t Jay.

“Mom I’m hungry,” Another voice called up to her.

Jenny sighed and started to walk towards the door. “There they were now, better prepare yourself, dinner time with them is like feeding a zoo full of monkeys.”

She gave me one last hug and walked downstairs to feed the ‘monkeys’.

John, I thought again. This was going to be interesting, since the last time we saw each other I swore he was a complete douche and would never play with him again.