Fire Escape

Days off didn't happen very often, but when they did come around I tried my best to take advantage them, careful not to waste a single moment.

I was used to waking up around the same time every day--7:00 am. In fact, I was so used to it that I hardly even needed to set an alarm anymore. Except for those occasional mornings when I had slept in just a bit too long and was forced to make it to morning skate in record time.

Paige was normally gone by then, leaving the sheets cold. She had a job at a high school a good distance away. She taught English there, and from what I could gather she couldn't have picked a better place. Sometimes she would bring home papers, stacks of them even, and sit on the floor in front of the TV for hours grading them. She was always so engrossed in each student's words, so much so that she would leave these long notes on how great she thought their work was or how they could improve. She really cared for these kids. It was amazing.

When we first started dating she would always correct my speech or fix my spelling. She wasn't annoyed with it, I don't think. It was probably more out of habit.

Then one day after I got off the phone I saw her standing there, arms crossed and leaning up against the wall with a smirk etched into her lips.

I think I like it better when I don't help you with your English. I like the way it sounds, all broken and rough. And your French is just absolutely... sexy.

And that's the way it went. She smiled when I would tell her a story and she melted when I spoke in my native tongue.

Now, as I lay here in bed, I debate on leaving or staying. But today was my day off, a day to do whatever I wanted.

I slid out from under the covers and over to the closet, leaving the bed a mess. I grabbed my favorite pair of jeans and the first t-shirt I saw. I quickly changed before grabbing my clothes from last night and tossing them in the hamper.

I never really saw the point in making my bed since I would be right back in it later that day, but it made Paige happy when I did. She hated when things looked messy.

Heading out into the kitchen, I opened the fridge, looked around, then shut it.

What I wanted to do was make her dinner. Maybe this time she would appreciate my effort.

*

She looked exhausted when she opened the door. She dropped her keys onto the table then kicked off her shoes. Heaving a sigh, she walked right past me. Maybe she hadn't noticed me.

If that were the case--and I prayed to God that it wasn't--she must not have noticed me for the past four months.

"I, um, I made dinner," I called after her, offering a smile as I stood up from my spot on the couch. "Hopefully you're hungry."

Paige stopped just before she reached the bedroom door, spinning to face me. "Oh. Okay."

We both headed over to the table and sat down across from each other. Passing bowls of food back and forth, the air around us seemed to turn unbearably quiet.

Grabbing both of our empty cups I made my way to the refrigerator. "Water? Iced tea?"

"Water's fine."

I filled the glasses and returned to my seat. She didn't look up from her plate. I couldn't keep myself from frowning.

After shoving a fork full of rice into my mouth I cleared my throat. "How was work?"

"Fine, I guess," she shrugged, pushing a few peas around on her place. "Did you have practice today?"

I shook my head. "No. Dan gave us a day off. We all really needed it. It starts taking a toll on you about half way through the season."

"It doesn't seem to bother you."

"I guess," I replied. "We're playing the Flyers in two days. It should be a good game."

She didn't reply; she still hadn't even looked up from her plate.

"I was hoping that maybe, if it were possible, you would come to this one. I miss having you there."

"I promised to have dinner with my mom that night," Paige replied.

Looking down I wondered why I had even asked, why I had even wasted my breath.

"Tu me manques. Revenez à moi s'il vous plaît," I mumbled.

We ate the rest of our dinner in silence. It seemed that every time we took one step forward we took two steps back. We hadn't had dinner together in weeks and now that we were it just brought on... more silence. The very thought broke my heart. How could two people that were once so close have nothing to say to each other?

"And now for dessert," I finally said, grabbing a box from the counter.

She laughed, actually laughed. "Kris, this isn't dessert."

Her laugh was, for lack of a better word, horrific. It was quite embarrassing, too. But the strange thing was that I had grown to love it and would do anything to hear it. As soon as you got a giggle out of her that was it, she couldn't control herself anymore. Even from down the hall, behind a door, and in another room you knew that it was her laugh. It was infectious and made you want to laugh with her.

I shrugged, a wide smile on my face. "It's the best I could do."

"You didn't make dinner, did you?"

Pretending to be crushed by her accusation, I placed a hand over my heart. "Of course I did."

She raised her eyebrows. "Then why are there take out boxes from Sesame Inn sitting next to the stove?"

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Bullshit," she chuckled.

"It's your favorite and, I don't know, we haven't had it in a while. I thought you might want some."

Paige unwrapped the fortune cookie and cracked it open. "The most important thing in communication is to hear what isn’t being said."

Oh, the irony.

Neither of us could meet each other's eyes. She folded her fortune in half then set it down on the table. I took a sip of my drink then opened my own fortune cookie.

"What does yours say?"

"Hold on to the past but eventually let the times go and keep the memories into the present."