Fire Escape

Dan blew the whistle and for once I didn't want practice to be over. My mind wasn't on overdrive; it wasn't racing with thoughts of Paige, leaving me dizzy. I wasn't focussed on anything, to be honest. I did the drills with ease, same with skating laps and passing pucks. I was just going through the motions. It seemed like my head was somewhere else, yet nowhere in particular.

I hung around for a while after everyone cleared the ice. I mostly shot some pucks to the net at different angles.

"Can't seem to leave, can you?" I heard someone call from behind me.

Stopping mid-slap shot, I let my stick gently come back down as I lifted my head and spun around. Sidney was standing behind the benches, his hat stuck on top of his recently washed hair and his arms crossed over his street clothes.

I spun back around, shooting the last puck I had lined up. I frowned when I heard it ring off the crossbar. Then I returned my focus back to him.

"Sometimes enough is enough, Tanger."

"What are you talking about? The more I practice the more the puck goes in," I replied, skating over to the net and gathering all the pucks for about the twelfth time.

"Theoretically. But this...," he drifted off, motioning to me and all of the black, vulcanized rubber discs. "This isn't practicing. I don't even know what to call this. You're just hitting pucks as hard as you can--no improvement."

I sighed. He was right.

"Am I right?"

I gave him a look that said he was and skated towards the bench to get the bucket.

"I wasn't just talking about hockey, you know."

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Enough is enough when it comes to--"

He was contemplating what he was about to say next, like it might hurt my feelings. That was Sidney, though, always picking and choosing his words like any good friend would. I was grateful for that--his sensitivity.

"Enough is enough when it comes to you and Paige," he repeated, almost in a rush.

I looked down and decided that I would rather concentrate on picking up pucks and dropping them into the bucket than think about what he just said. The only sound that could be heard was a light thud.

"You know it's true, too. That's why you can't say anything, can't object or defend your relationship," he told me.

More silence.

"Look around, Kris. It's you and her in a relationship, you and her, nobody else. She's moved on from you but she won't cut the string," he told me. "I think she wants you to do it, honestly. I don't know why she isn't interested in you... Whether one of you cheated--"

"I didn't, I swear. I could never do--"

"I know. You're not that kind of person. I know that. But is she?"

"No, I don't think so," I told him.

"Well, whatever the reason is, it's killing you. But you're the one dragging this out, Kris, not Paige. This might be a bit harsh, but it's starting to get pathetic. She's only pulling you down now. Any more and you'll lose sight of who you are. Please tell me you can at least see that."

Reluctantly, I nodded.

"Look, Paige is a great girl. A really great girl. She brought out the best in you and made you happy," Sid said. "You love her, I know. And I know that's why it's so hard to let her go. But don't you think now is the time? If you don't now, when will you, if ever? You're a fool to stay, Kris."

I didn't know how to respond. Silence was beginning to consume my life.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to make you upset or anything. I was only trying to help."

"No, no, it's fine. Really. I appreciate it," I told him. "Thank you."

"I just figured, you know... You're not a very open guy, and I completely understand that, but if, you know, you ever need to talk about it I don't mind listening."

I couldn't help but chuckle a bit. "Thanks, Sid."

He put his hands up in the air. "Hey, I don't like to have cheesy moments like that either but somebody had to do it. Anyway, I have to get going. I have a ton of crap I have to do before the game tonight. Put the rest of those," he said, pointing to the mass amount of pucks, "in the bucket and go home, okay?"

"Aye aye, Captain."

I watched him pull his hat down a little lower then shove his hands into his hoodie pocket. Seconds later he was out of sight. I let out a sigh, lightly shaking my head.