Better Than Me

"When I saw you piss on the rug/My heart fluttered and I knew it was love/True love!" Riley sang, grandly gesturing towards Jacob. "And all the things that you said and did to your mom/I knew you were the only one/The only one for me/Go and call the priest/So he can exorcise me/Be my ghoul tonight/Regan, it was love at first fright/First fright!"

Jacob was laughing. "How can you listen to this?"

"Hey!" Riley protested, acting offended. "I love the Murderdolls! They're great!"

"If you say so."

It was two o'clock in the afternoon and they were on their way to Bailey Brothers, a music store in downtown Birmingham. Jacob was in the market for new strings and he was going to check on a chord that Cody needed.

Riley had slept soundly for almost twelve straight hours. When she'd entered the kitchen this morning in search of breakfast, Jacob had again offered to drive her to her parents' house in Cullman. Riley had asked if it was okay for her to stay with him and go to Lynam's show that night in Scottsboro. Of course, Jacob had agreed.

Riley couldn't prevent her awareness that she hadn't felt this lighthearted in a long while. She was beginning to think there was nothing better than riding in a car with Jacob on a sunny day, rocking out to the music in her iTunes library.

"Fine!" Riley perused her track list. "If I can't play the Murderdolls..." She selected a song, a sly grin on her face.

"Give It to Me" by Timbaland, Nelly Furtado, and Justin Timberlake pulsed from his speakers. Jacob glanced over at her, eyebrows raised.

"I'm the type of girl that looks you dead in the eye, eye/I'm real as it comes, if you don't know why I'm fly-y-y-y/I've seen you tryin' to switch it up, but girl you ain't that dope/I'm the one that won, let me go get my robe," Riley intoned. "I'm a supermodel and mami, si mami/ Amnesty International got Bangkok to Monte Carlo/Loved my ass and my abs in the video for 'Promiscuous'/My style is ridi-di-diculous."

"You and David can take his 4-Runner tonight!" Jacob said, shaking his head. "Y'all will get along fine."

Riley snickered. "Alright, alright. I'll quit torturing you." She chose Prince's "When Doves Cry" next.

"Dig if you will the picture/Of you and I engaged in a kiss/The sweat of your body covers me/Can you, my darling, can you picture this?" Riley and Jacob sang together, Jacob harmonizing with her despite having the better voice. "Dream if you can, a courtyard/An ocean of violets in bloom/Animals strike curious poses/They feel the heat, the heat between me and you."

Riley snuck a peek at Jacob. It may have been a mistake to play this song. The lyrics were provocative, and she couldn't deny that there was something about Jacob singing them that she liked.

"How could you just leave me standing/alone in a world that's so cold?/Maybe I'm just too demanding/Maybe I'm just like my father, too bold/Maybe you're just like my mother/She's never satisfied/Why do we scream at each other?/This is what it sounds like when doves cry.

"Touch, if you will, my stomach/Feel how it trembles inside/You've got the butterflies all tied up/Don't make me chase you/Even doves have pride."

Jacob eased the Corvette into an empty parking space in front of the store. Riley trailed in behind him. One of the men at the counter greeted Jacob with enthusiasm. This was obviously one of Jacob's frequent haunts.

Riley sat on a piano bench as Jacob got a pack of guitar strings and discussed equipment with the man. After about ten minutes, it dawned on Riley that the employees were trying to persuade Jacob to play a song for them.

"I would," Jacob said. "But I really don't have time."

"Oh, come on, Jacob," Riley piped up. "One song. It will make their day go by so much quicker."

Jacob shot her a look, scowling. She smiled sweetly. The employees seemed to think that with Riley's input, their battle was won. They were right.

Jacob and the employees went into the room that housed the acoustic guitars. Riley hesitated in the doorway, resting her shoulder against the frame.

Jacob adjusted the tuning of one of the guitars. Once he had it right, he strummed an intro that was familiar to Riley. A tiny shiver crept down her spine.

"A million ways, a million ways to show/A million miles away from letting you go/And I know you're wrong about me/And I hope you're wrong about me.

"Don't say a word/You're not alone/I'm getting closer to you/I'll give it away/All for you/There's nothing I wouldn't do.

"A million things, a million things to say/I'm getting lost in your eyes/You're running away/And I know you're wrong about me/And I hope you're wrong about me.

"Don't say a word/You're not alone/I'm getting closer to you/I'll give it away/All for you/There's nothing I wouldn't do.

"I won't let you down/I won't let you go..."

Riley crept away, hoping everyone else was too engrossed in the music to notice. Her throat and nose were burning with unshed tears. She didn't know if the tears threatening to fall were because of the way the lyrics had brought Andy to mind, or because those beautiful words being sung in Jacob's lovely voice just caused that depth of emotion.

Riley pushed through the door. She leaned on Jacob's sleek black Corvette and took a few deep breaths, willing the tears away. She was composed by the time Jacob ambled out of the store. His expression was pleasant, but his eyes revealed his concern.

"Was I that bad?" he joked, unlocking the car.

Relieved that he wasn't going to pry, Riley giggled. "You were pretty horrible."

"Thank God you don't have to pay a cover tonight, then."

"Amen!"

Jacob chuckled.

"Where are we going next?" Riley questioned as she perused the contents of her iTunes library.

"I have to pick up some hairspray, then we have to meet Cody and David in Trussville."

Riley arched an eyebrow. "Hairspray? That's the item at the top of your shopping list?"

"Um, have you looked at Lynam recently?"

Riley rolled her eyes, amused. "It's astounding there's any ozone left in the atmosphere with guys like Lynam and the Black Veil Brides running around." She turned her attention back to her cell.

"Don't hate me because I'm beautiful," Jacob said, smirking.

Riley snorted. "That's one word for what you are."

"Are you ever going to put some music on, or am I going to have to choose something?"

"Keep your panties on!" Riley reached over and upped the volume. "Time for a dose of my favorite band."

The touch of a button brought on the somber intro to Pink Floyd's "High Hopes." Riley involuntarily smiled, a feeling of peace washing over her. She loved Pink Floyd.

**********

Riley's cheeks ached from the smile that had been on her face every since she and Jacob had arrived at David's house that afternoon. Jacob had not alerted either David or Cody to her presence; therefore, both men were shocked and ecstatic to see her emerging from Jacob's Corvette.

Now, at a place called Geno's Live in Scottsboro, Alabama, Riley was entranced with the performance taking place. There was no shortage of attention from the three attractive band members, and she had received more than a few jealous glares and/or curious glances. Dating Andy Biersack had given her plenty of practice in ignoring such things, so she barely noticed.

David waved, drawing her focus onto him. With a flick of the wrist, he tossed a drumstick to her. She easily caught it. He held up his hand to signal that she should throw it back. She was prepared to do so when Jacob stepped in front of her, planting his feet wide and glancing at David with a grin.

"This song is dedicated to all of the ladies," Jacob said, and the band began Cheap Trick's "I Want You to Want Me."

Jacob went to his knees, his eyes fixed on Riley. She felt her cheeks grow warm as he leaned closer.

"I want you to want me/I need you to need me/I'd love you to love me/I'm begging you to beg me/I want you to want me/I need you to need me/I'd love you to love me..."

Riley couldn't ignore the butterflies in her stomach or the way her heart thudded heavily in her chest. She knew she was blushing and she tore her gaze from Jacob's. She knew he always put on similar performances for their audiences, but she couldn't quite forget that he had admitted, a little over three weeks ago, that he had feelings for her. If music was the way he expressed himself, then he was delivering the same message again, here and now.

They brought their friend Brian Vaughn up on stage to sing later in the set. He covered Bon Jovi's "Wanted Dead or Alive," Cee Lo Green's "Fuck You," Heart's "Alone," and Papa Roach's "Last Resort." He seemed ready to do another song, looking at Jacob both questioningly and expectantly.

"We have another special guest here tonight," Jacob said, and Riley shot him her most threatening glare. "She came all the way from Los Angeles, California, to visit our sorry asses. I had the pleasure of being serenaded by her in the car today and I think it's only fair that y'all get to have the same experience."

Riley shook her head. "No! Jacob, please."

"Come on, Riley," Jacob urged. "You owe me one after Bailey Brothers."

No good deed goes unpunished, Riley thought. She made her way to the stairs at the far side of the stage and joined the band onstage. Brian handed her the spare mic and jogged out of sight.

"Do you know 'Zombie' by The Cranberries?" Jacob asked, bending to speak in her ear.

Riley nodded confirmation. She shifted nervously as Lynam played the intro. She was fine belting out random songs in the shower or car. This, though, was entirely different.

Watching her, Jacob flashed an encouraging smile. Riley lifted the mic to her lips.

"Another head hangs lowly, child is slowly taken/And the violence caused such silence/Who are we mistaken?

"But you see, it's not me, it's not my family/In your head, in your head, they are fighting/With their tanks and their bombs/And their bombs and their guns/In your head, in your head, they are crying."

Jacob was suddenly right beside her. Riley turned, looking up into his face. He was mouthing the words with her.

"In your head, in your head/Zombie, zombie, zombie/Hey, hey/What's in your head? In your head/Zombie, zombie, zombie/Hey, hey, hey, hey, oh, dou, dou, dou, dou, dou.

"Another mother's breakin' heart is taking over/When the violence causes silence, we must be mistaken.

"It's the same old theme since nineteen-sixteen/In your head, in your head/They're still fighting/With their tanks and their bombs/And their bombs and their guns/In your head, in your head/They are dying.

"In your head, in your head/Zombie, zombie, zombie/Hey, hey, hey/What's in your head? In your head/Zombie, zombie, zombie/Hey, hey, hey, hey..."

"Hell yeah!" David crowed as the song's conclusion was fading away. "We need to keep her. We actually sounded good!"

The audience was shouting its approval. Riley blushed. She set the mic at the edge of the drum riser and hurried for the stairs. Jacob caught her at the top of the stairs.

"You were awesome. Thank you." He kissed her on the cheek.

The band did two more songs with Brian, then Jacob announced that they were going to take a short break. He descended the steps and beckoned to Riley. She walked to him and he pulled her to the door that connected the club to the pizza place next door, which was owned by the same people.

The restaurant was closed by this hour. The only staff that remained were those working the bar at the club. Empty and dimly-lit, the restaurant was peaceful in comparison to what they'd just left.

"Shouldn't you be in there, schmoozing with the fans?" Riley said teasingly.

"Cody has enough 'schmooze' for the three of us," Jacob responded.

He slid into a booth. Riley sat across from him.

"So I was thinking," Jacob said.

"Did you hurt yourself?"

"Ha ha. I'm serious."

"Okay. What were you thinking?"

"I'm flying to L.A. Monday morning." Jacob studied her as he finished: "You should fly back with me."

Riley remained silent.

"You do intend to go back, right?" he queried.

"Of course."

"You need to go back soon, Riley. You're not going to be able to out-wait your problems. They're still going to be there, no matter how long you wait."

"I know."

"How much longer is BVB going to be on the road?"

"Just over two months."

Jacob frowned. "Will you be able to take some time and go see Andy so that y'all can talk?"

"Yeah. It shouldn't be an issue."

"Riley." Jacob reached for her hand and she let him take it. "I understand that you had to run. You needed some space and time to lick your wounds. But...too much time can only make it worse."

"Especially if he figures out where I am. And who I'm with."

Jacob nodded. "I'm not sure you did yourself any favors coming here."

She sighed. "I don't care. I've been walking on eggshells for too fucking long." She gave his hand a squeeze. "I missed you."

"I missed you, too."

Riley was quiet for a long while, contemplating the situation. Finally, she said "I'll fly out with you Monday morning."

It wasn't until they were back at Jacob's house and Riley was getting ready for bed that she checked her cell phone. She had a text message from Andy.

"We really need to talk. Let me know when you'll be home. I'll find a way to get there, even if we have to cancel a show."

Riley sent him a reply, informing him that she would be on a plane to L.A. Monday morning. The time had come. They were either going to mend the relationship or decide that it was best for the relationship to stay in pieces.