Status: NEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Hesitate
Where'd she go?
“Get off me.” Corey hissed at her as he pushed her away.
“Corey, I love you.” She said persistently trying to kiss him again.
“You need to leave.”
“But—“
“What part of ‘you need to leave’ is so difficult to comprehend?” he said with his voice growing louder.
“Cor-“
“I said GO!” his voice thundered even startling the group of guys inside.
“Fine.” She snapped. “Don’t expect me to come back.”
“I don’t.” he promised.
She stormed through the house and back out front to her car, skidding away in the darkness.
When Corey finally came back inside, he was greeted with some very confused faces.
“The fuck’s going on?” Sid finally had the guts to blurt out.
He exhaled deeply, “She got the paperwork my lawyer faxed to her earlier.”
“Wait. So, you guys didn’t make up just now?”
“Uhhhhh that’s a definite ‘no’.” He assured them. Looking around he noticed Ashleigh was nowhere in the room. “Where’d she go?”
“She left a little earlier. Called a cab to come get her.” Shawn answered.
“Why the hell would she do that?”
He shrugged, “I don’t know. She went to see if you two wanted something to drink. Then she came back in and called the aforementioned cab.”
“Damn it. I gotta go.” He said grabbing his car keys off the table and rushed out the door. “I’ll see you guys later.”
When he got to her house, luckily, the door was unlocked. He crept in slowly and heard rhythmic pounding coming from her work out room. He followed the sound and slowly opened up the door to find her sparring with the punching bag. He didn’t say a word at first. He just watched as her feet and hands made furious contact with the bag.
“Hey.” That was the only thing he could get to cross his lips. She turned to look at him for a second and attacked the bag with what seemed to be a second wind of the fury he was witnessing before. “You’re not careful, you’re going to kill that thing.” He said in an attempt at humor. She still wasn’t talking let alone looking in his direction. “Will you fucking say something, please?” he said raising his voice slightly in aggravation.
“You don’t get to tell me what to do,” She said with her back turned, “and you certainly have no right to walk into this house with all those lies just pouring out of your mouth.”
Those words stung. He’d never seen her this pissed. And she has definitely never talked to him that way.
“I never lied to you.” He replied lowly. “You should know better than that.”
“oh yeah…” she rolled her eyes. “because you’ve definitely never made promises that you just conveniently forgot about and didn’t live up to. Yeah, I was wrong. You’re perfect, Corey.”
“I know I was a fuck up.” He said with a twinge of hurt and guilt. “There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t remember how shitty of a person I used to be. I can’t go back and change it now, Ash. I can’t. I’ve tried. Believe me. And before you say it, I know that it doesn’t fix anything. Do you really, honestly think that I don’t hate myself for all the times I promised things to you, and didn’t do it? I was really fucked up at the time. You know that. I didn’t come around because I didn’t want you see me at my worst. It never had anything to do with me not wanting to see you or be around you. If you haven’t noticed, I’m trying pretty damn hard here lately to make up for everything.”
“What about your wife?” she mumbled.
“What about her?”
“I saw you….”
“I know what you saw.” he said. “Want me to tell you want you didn’t see? I pushed her away and made her leave.” She just looked at him as she sat down on the floor holding her bottle of water. “She’d gotten the divorce papers that my lawyer faxed her. That’s what I went to Shawn’s for today. I gave them his fax number, I signed the papers, faxed them back, and they faxed them to her.” He sat down next to her and let her head lean on his shoulder.
“I’m sorry.” She mumbled. “It’s not like I had a right to be mad anyway. It’s so stupid. It’s not like we’re ‘together’ or anything. God, I’m an idiot.”
“First, you’re not an idiot. You can do Sudoku like no one’s business.” He smirked trying to break some of the tension in the room.
She laughed softly, “Gee thanks.”
“Second, whoever said that we’re not together?” She looked at him bewildered. “I mean….I’d like for us to be….Let’s face it….we’ve been crazy about each other for twelve years now. How else could you explain how stupid we’ve acted all these years. And by ‘we’ I mean ‘me’.” Those words and his smile made her heart soar. “Come here.” He said pulling her onto his lap to face him. “So, what do you think?”
“You really been crazy about me this whole time?” she said leaning her forehead against his.
“Mmmhmm.” He nodded sneaking a quick kiss. “You know how when we first met I said I wasn’t interested in hooking up or whatever……..”
“Yeah?”
“I lied...” He laughed and she playfully smacked him in the side. “What? You were like….what 18 or 19?” she nodded. “Yeah and I was 27ish on tour with my band with this hot 18 year old girl with these amazing green eyes, gorgeous long blonde hair, and a great body, on my fucking bus. Then I find out that you’re smart and funny, too. I’d have to be completely fucking stupid not to be crazy about you.” He reached up brushing her bangs from her eyes and changing to a more serious tone, “You saved me, ya know. I probably wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you.”
She kissed his lips softly and asked, “Then why the hell did you wait so long?”
“I don’t know…..you didn’t need to be with someone like me…..the way I was at the time……things were messed up and I guess I didn’t think I deserved you. I knew I had to fix a bunch of shit before I could even think of anything like that.”
“You deserve to have everything in the world. I’ve always thought that.” She told him plainly.
He cupped her face in his hands and looked her straight in the eyes, “You *are* everything in the world.”
“Cor.” She whispered placing her hand over his own that still touched her face.
“I love you,” he said beating her to the punch, “and I want to be with you. I know I don’t have a terrific track record….but I’m here and I don’t plan on going anywhere.”
“I……” she began and he listened intently gauging her reaction, “want to be with you, too.”
“Corey, I love you.” She said persistently trying to kiss him again.
“You need to leave.”
“But—“
“What part of ‘you need to leave’ is so difficult to comprehend?” he said with his voice growing louder.
“Cor-“
“I said GO!” his voice thundered even startling the group of guys inside.
“Fine.” She snapped. “Don’t expect me to come back.”
“I don’t.” he promised.
She stormed through the house and back out front to her car, skidding away in the darkness.
When Corey finally came back inside, he was greeted with some very confused faces.
“The fuck’s going on?” Sid finally had the guts to blurt out.
He exhaled deeply, “She got the paperwork my lawyer faxed to her earlier.”
“Wait. So, you guys didn’t make up just now?”
“Uhhhhh that’s a definite ‘no’.” He assured them. Looking around he noticed Ashleigh was nowhere in the room. “Where’d she go?”
“She left a little earlier. Called a cab to come get her.” Shawn answered.
“Why the hell would she do that?”
He shrugged, “I don’t know. She went to see if you two wanted something to drink. Then she came back in and called the aforementioned cab.”
“Damn it. I gotta go.” He said grabbing his car keys off the table and rushed out the door. “I’ll see you guys later.”
When he got to her house, luckily, the door was unlocked. He crept in slowly and heard rhythmic pounding coming from her work out room. He followed the sound and slowly opened up the door to find her sparring with the punching bag. He didn’t say a word at first. He just watched as her feet and hands made furious contact with the bag.
“Hey.” That was the only thing he could get to cross his lips. She turned to look at him for a second and attacked the bag with what seemed to be a second wind of the fury he was witnessing before. “You’re not careful, you’re going to kill that thing.” He said in an attempt at humor. She still wasn’t talking let alone looking in his direction. “Will you fucking say something, please?” he said raising his voice slightly in aggravation.
“You don’t get to tell me what to do,” She said with her back turned, “and you certainly have no right to walk into this house with all those lies just pouring out of your mouth.”
Those words stung. He’d never seen her this pissed. And she has definitely never talked to him that way.
“I never lied to you.” He replied lowly. “You should know better than that.”
“oh yeah…” she rolled her eyes. “because you’ve definitely never made promises that you just conveniently forgot about and didn’t live up to. Yeah, I was wrong. You’re perfect, Corey.”
“I know I was a fuck up.” He said with a twinge of hurt and guilt. “There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t remember how shitty of a person I used to be. I can’t go back and change it now, Ash. I can’t. I’ve tried. Believe me. And before you say it, I know that it doesn’t fix anything. Do you really, honestly think that I don’t hate myself for all the times I promised things to you, and didn’t do it? I was really fucked up at the time. You know that. I didn’t come around because I didn’t want you see me at my worst. It never had anything to do with me not wanting to see you or be around you. If you haven’t noticed, I’m trying pretty damn hard here lately to make up for everything.”
“What about your wife?” she mumbled.
“What about her?”
“I saw you….”
“I know what you saw.” he said. “Want me to tell you want you didn’t see? I pushed her away and made her leave.” She just looked at him as she sat down on the floor holding her bottle of water. “She’d gotten the divorce papers that my lawyer faxed her. That’s what I went to Shawn’s for today. I gave them his fax number, I signed the papers, faxed them back, and they faxed them to her.” He sat down next to her and let her head lean on his shoulder.
“I’m sorry.” She mumbled. “It’s not like I had a right to be mad anyway. It’s so stupid. It’s not like we’re ‘together’ or anything. God, I’m an idiot.”
“First, you’re not an idiot. You can do Sudoku like no one’s business.” He smirked trying to break some of the tension in the room.
She laughed softly, “Gee thanks.”
“Second, whoever said that we’re not together?” She looked at him bewildered. “I mean….I’d like for us to be….Let’s face it….we’ve been crazy about each other for twelve years now. How else could you explain how stupid we’ve acted all these years. And by ‘we’ I mean ‘me’.” Those words and his smile made her heart soar. “Come here.” He said pulling her onto his lap to face him. “So, what do you think?”
“You really been crazy about me this whole time?” she said leaning her forehead against his.
“Mmmhmm.” He nodded sneaking a quick kiss. “You know how when we first met I said I wasn’t interested in hooking up or whatever……..”
“Yeah?”
“I lied...” He laughed and she playfully smacked him in the side. “What? You were like….what 18 or 19?” she nodded. “Yeah and I was 27ish on tour with my band with this hot 18 year old girl with these amazing green eyes, gorgeous long blonde hair, and a great body, on my fucking bus. Then I find out that you’re smart and funny, too. I’d have to be completely fucking stupid not to be crazy about you.” He reached up brushing her bangs from her eyes and changing to a more serious tone, “You saved me, ya know. I probably wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you.”
She kissed his lips softly and asked, “Then why the hell did you wait so long?”
“I don’t know…..you didn’t need to be with someone like me…..the way I was at the time……things were messed up and I guess I didn’t think I deserved you. I knew I had to fix a bunch of shit before I could even think of anything like that.”
“You deserve to have everything in the world. I’ve always thought that.” She told him plainly.
He cupped her face in his hands and looked her straight in the eyes, “You *are* everything in the world.”
“Cor.” She whispered placing her hand over his own that still touched her face.
“I love you,” he said beating her to the punch, “and I want to be with you. I know I don’t have a terrific track record….but I’m here and I don’t plan on going anywhere.”
“I……” she began and he listened intently gauging her reaction, “want to be with you, too.”