How The Hell Did You Ever Pick Me?

It’s now July 22 and we are at the Hartford date. These past couple weeks have been hard for Kellin and I. We’ve been fighting a lot. I can’t understand why. We’ve never fought this much ever and it’s tearing me apart. He always apologizes but one day it won’t be enough. I know one day I’ll get sick of it, and I think he’s starting to realize it too. I overheard him crying in the backroom yesterday. He’s afraid of losing me. If he’s so afraid of losing me then why must he insist on picking fights? Don’t get me wrong, I love that boy, but one day that love won’t be enough. Mike and I have been getting closer and closer. He comforts me every time Kellin makes me cry. He holds me tight and wipes away my tears. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t developing feelings for Mike. All those times he held me while I cried and all those times we cuddled are finally adding up. I love Kellin, but I like Mike at the same time. I can’t believe myself.

“Stephanie, are you ready for the sunblock?” Kellin asked, pulling me out of my thoughts. I smiled at him and said “Mhm.” I stood up and extended my arms out as he applied sunblock to them. After a couple minutes he was done. He kissed me and said “Remember we go on at four today, Love.” “I know, Boo.” I smiled at him. I wrapped my arms around his neck and pecked him on the lips. “I love you so much.” He smiled down at me. “I love you too.” I giggled. He clipped my laminate onto my belt loop before I left the bus. I smiled knowing that within a few minutes I would be with the guys from Pierce.

As soon as I stepped onto Pierce’s bus I was showered with hugs. “Hey guys!” I giggled. “We’re playing FIFA!” Jaime exclaimed. I sat on the couch with the guys while they resumed their game. Mike’s arm snaked around my waist and I rested my head on his shoulder. Mike turned to me and asked “So, did Kellin pick a fight with you yet?” “Not yet.” I replied. “Good.” He smirked. The guys hated seeing me hurt. Yeah, they are friends with Kellin, but they can’t stand the way he’s been treating me lately. Mike passed the controller to Vic and asked me “Do you want to go watch a movie in the back room?” I smiled and said “Sure.” I followed Mike into the back room and sat on the couch while he picked out a movie.

“I’ll make a Potterhead out of you yet.” He said while putting a disk in the DVD player. I laughed and said “Oh god. Which one are you making me watch now?” Mike has been trying to get me to like Harry Potter. So far we’ve watched the first and second movie. I’ve been trying to get into it, but it’s just plain boring to me. “Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban.” He replied, sitting down next to me. I smirked and said “I’m more of a Star Wars kinda girl.” “Fine, go hangout with Tony then.” He pouted, crossing his arms. I got up and opened the door separating the back room from the rest of the bus. “Tony!” I called out. “I was joking. I want to hang out with you.” He said while taking my hand and pulling me over to him. I closed the door and sat on his lap. He looked into my eyes and placed his hand on the side of my face. My heart started racing as our lips got closer and closer. Is this really happening? Am I really about to kiss Mike? Our lips brushed right when the door flung open. We jerked back and I turned to see Tony standing in the door way. “What did you want, Stephanie?” My face grew pale. Did he see what just happened? I don’t think so, because he would’ve said something. He’s used to seeing me on Mike’s lap so maybe he thinks nothing happened. “I…I was going to hang out with you because Mike jokingly told me to. But, he was just joking so…yep.” I said nervously. He narrowed his eyes at me. “Ummm…okay?” he replied, clearly confused. He turned around and shut the door behind him.

“Do you think he saw anything?” I asked Mike. “No, I think we jumped back quick enough.” He replied. Thank god. I don’t want to know what would happen if Tony saw us kiss. I slid off of his lap and looked down. He started playing the movie. We watched the movie in silence. I can’t believe we actually kissed, even if it was for a split second. The worst part is I don’t even feel guilty about it. I looked up at Mike and he was already looking down at me. I scooted closer to him and he wrapped his arm around my waist. I want to kiss him again so badly. I don’t know what’s coming over me. Before I knew what was happening Mike crushed his lips against mine. I reached up and grabbed the back of his head, pulling him closer to me. His tongue danced around my lips. I can taste the nicotine in his saliva. I bit his bottom lip and he quietly moaned. He deepened the kiss. I started lying down as he got on top of me. He started kissing my collar bone and trailed kisses up my neck, back to my lips. He gave my breast a tight squeeze and grinded against me. A small moan escaped my mouth. I can feel him getting hard against my inner thigh. I reached down and started stroking him thru his mesh shorts. He moaned my name and started sucking on my neck.

Woah, woah, woah! What the fuck am I doing? I can’t cheat on Kellin with Mike. As much as I didn’t want us to stop, we had to. “Stop.” I breathed. I slithered out from underneath him and stood up quickly. “I have to go.” I stated before opening the door. “Don’t go.” He said while reaching out for me. I shook my head and jogged to the front of the bus and out the door.

Mike’s P.O.V

I tried to catch up to her, but I was too late. She was gone. “What was that about?” Vic asked. Jaime and Tony looked up at me too obviously wondering the same thing. “I…I don’t know.” I mumbled before turning around and heading to the back room. I slammed the door shut and sat on the couch with my head in my hands. What if I fucked up our friendship? I thought she was enjoying it; I didn’t mean to go so far with her. I just wanted her so badly. “Fuck!” I shouted. I hope Kellin doesn’t find out. Even though, I know I could take him, I don’t want to fight him. I’d feel bad about it.

Stephanie’s P.O.V

I ran as far away from Pierce The Veil’s bus as possible. I stopped to catch my breath. Holy shit, I can’t believe I did that back there. I’m a whore. I don’t even know what came over me. “Oh god.” I mumbled as I remembered that Mike was sucking on my neck. If he left a mark, I’m dead. I took my cell phone out of my pocket and looked at myself thru the reflection. There is a faint purple mark on my neck. I pray to god Kellin does not see this.

All the memories we shared together started replaying in my head. Tears started forming as I pictured Kellin’s angelic face. I fell to my knees as I imagined Kellin leaving me. I wiped the tears from my eyes and stood back up. Kellin can never find out what happened back there. Yes, I like Mike, but I love Kellin. My phone vibrated in my hand. I looked at it to see I had a text from Kellin.

“Lunch in half an hour? :)” It read

“Of course. Where are we meeting up?” I texted

“Behind our merch table. I’m doing a signing there now. So, I should be done by the time you get here.” He replied.

I started walking to the bus so I can fix my makeup and to see what I can do about this hickey. As I got closer I could see Jaime standing outside the door, probably waiting for me. I walked over and he pulled me into his arms and gave me a tight squeeze. He pulled away and asked “What did Mike do to you, Doll Face?” I shook my head and opened the door and motioned for him to follow me in. He stood at the doorway of the bathroom as I was re-applying my makeup. The hickey was barely noticeable now that I can see it better. I’ll be surprised if Kellin noticed it. “Please tell me what happened back there.” Jaime pleaded. “I can’t.” I choked out. “I know something happened. You can tell me. I won’t tell anyone.” He stated. “Jaime, I have to go meet Kellin for lunch.” I sighed. He moved out of the doorway and followed me off the bus.

I ran into Kellin’s arms. He laughed and asked “Happy to see me?” I nodded eagerly and kissed him. He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and led me to catering. Kellin and I sat down in the grass with our food. “So, what did you do with the guys in Pierce?” he asked casually while sipping on a Monster. I could feel the color drain from my face. I looked down and started peeling my orange. “We played FIFA. How was the signing?” I replied. He smiled and said “Great, but there were way too many fan girls freaking out.” I chuckled and said “Your fans love you.” We ate in silence for a couple few minutes. All I could think about was what Mike and I did earlier. I can’t believe I actually went as far as stroking his dick, which is bigger than Kellin’s might I add. I can’t believe I put myself in that situation. “Are you okay, Babe?” Kellin asked. “Yeah.” I replied, forcing myself to smile at him.

I spent the day avoiding the guys in Pierce The Veil. I know Jaime, Tony, and Vic know something’s up. I stayed by Kellin’s side for the rest of the day. Kellin and I watched Man Overboard perform before he had to perform. I didn’t go to Pierce The Veil’s set with Kellin after we had dinner. I made up the excuse that I had to get ready for the party.

I’m kind of excited for the party tonight; it’s going to be huge. It’s supposed to last all night because buses don’t leave until tomorrow night. Kellin gets a day off tomorrow, which means we get to spend the day together.

I just hope Jaime doesn’t bring up what happened earlier. I really don’t want to tell him. I’m afraid that once I tell him, the guys in Pierce will think I’m a band whore; which is definitely not the case. After, I was finished doing my makeup and curling my hair, I sat up front with Jesse, Justin, Gabe, and Jack.

“Damn!” Jesse exclaimed when he saw me in my tight black dress and heels. I giggled and asked “Are you guys ready to party?” “Hell yeah! We already started.” Justin replied and showed me his red cup. “Do you want some?” Jesse offered. “Sure, what is it?” I asked. “See for yourself.” Jesse said while handing me a cup. I sipped on it. It’s definitely whiskey. I took a few big gulps and thanked Jesse. “When is Kellin coming back? I want to head to the party.” Jack whined. I laughed and said “He should be here in a few, but he has to get changed first.”

By the time the guys, Kellin, and I left the tour bus I was already buzzed. “You look so sexy.” Kellin whispered in my ear. “Thank you.” I giggled. As soon as we got to the party, Kellin handed me a jack and coke. “Thanks, Boo.” I said and kissed him on the cheek. Kellin made his rounds, talking to everyone he knew. He kept his arm around my waist the whole time. I saw Vic, Mike, and a few other people talking about thirty feet away. “I’m going to say “hi” to Vic and Mike real quick.” I yelled over the music. He nodded and I started walking towards them. I can definitely feel the alcohol taking its toll on me. I gulped down what was left in my cup before approaching the group. I greeted everyone before turning to face Mike. “I think we need to talk.” I shouted over the music. He nodded and led me away from everyone. We stopped by the drink table for refills before going somewhere private.

“Look, I’m sorry Steph. I don’t know what I was thinking.” He said, taking my hand in his. I need to tell him how I feel. The alcohol is giving me a boost of confidence. “You don’t have to apologize. “ I took another sip of my drink before continuing “I…I like you, Mike. I’m sorry I ran away earlier. I just had so many things going thru my head.” I replied. A smile crept across his face before he said “I really fucking like you, Steph. You’re amazing and I just wish you were mine.” We stood in silence for a about a minute. “What are we going to do?” he asked. “I don’t know. I can’t leave the one I love for the one I like, Mike.” He nodded and said “Well, I guess I’ll have to wait then. I know you’re getting tired of him and all the fighting. He’ll fuck up and when he does, I’ll be there.” “I…I have to get back to Kellin now.” I stammered. He suddenly grabbed me around the waist and pulled me closer to him; crushing his lips against mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him back. I pulled away after a few seconds. I kissed him on the cheek before turning away and walking back towards the party.

“Stephanie!” Mike called out. I turned around and yelled “Yeah?” “You look fucking sexy tonight.” Mike smirked. I smiled and continued walking. By the time I got back to the party I was done with my drink so I picked up another refill before returning back to Kellin.