Postcards and Polaroids

Kellin took my hand, and lead me inside.
It was cold, and quiet. He brought me into their room to practice.
“Ohhhh..” Jesse said “Here she is.” I blushed. Were they expecting me? Standing next to him was another girl. Small, blonde, and with big brown eyes.
“This is Jenna” he said “She’s my girlfriend. You obviously must be Kellin’s fiance.” I blushed. I liked the sound of that. I nodded.
“We’ve heard a lot about you..” Justin said. He smirked. I wondered what Kellin had told them. I felt my cheeks burn.
“I’m just glad to see Kellin’s not crying anymore..” Jesse laughed. Kellin’s face turned bright red.
“Shut up.” He mumbled. I looked at him.
“Crying?” I asked. He bit his lip.
“There were some nights I’d hear him in his room, crying, because he missed you.” I contained my smile. He had missed me that much? I suddenly didn’t feel so ridiculous for crying over him.
“Yes, yes, can we get passed that now?” Kellin asked. Everyone laughed.
“Should I assume she’s coming on tour with us?” Jesse asked. Kellin slightly nodded.
“If that’s alright..” He said.
“Of course it is, Jenna’s coming this time too. We have enough room for guests.” He winked at me. I squeezed Kellin’s hand tighter.
“So what’s this I hear about a record deal?” I asked. Jesse’s face lit up.
“Pretty sweet, right?” He said “They heard us at one of our shows, asked to sign us right away. I mean, we were pretty good, but we wouldn’t be nearly as great without Kellin.” I looked up at him. He was blushing, looking at his feet.
“The kids good at writing songs” He said.
“Can I hear one?” I asked. Jesse smiled.
“Sure.” He said. Kellin sighed
“Realllyyy? Right now?” He asked.
“She wants to hear a song, you wrote it about her, why won’t you just sing it.” Kellin smiled.
“Fine..”
I sat down in a folding chair near their performance area. Kellin went over to the microphone, and looked at me. I looked back. He blushed, waiting for Jesse to start.

I found a love that swept me off of my feet
Found a baby, she’s the finest thing this boy had ever seen.
She’d pick you up,
and make you wanna fall hard
When I step out on the scene, they shout
Oh my god

I quietly watched him, trying to contain the stupid smile on my face. He was good. Really good. I got lost in him when he sang. His voice, his eyes, his smile. It was easy to see why they were doing so good.

She’s so unreal
She lets me take her home
Let my body love your body, baby
All night long
He was just.. perfect. This made me think. I couldn’t be the only one who thought this. I wondered what the other girls in the crowd thought about him. Probably the same perverted, degrading things I heard from the women around me when he was auditioning. It made me angry, thinking other girls wanted him the way I did.

I wanna write a song about you now, yeah
Something that would make you wanna start
I wanna write a song about you now, yeah
Something from the bottom of my heart

I pictured him singing to other girls, making their hearts race, and them picturing their lives, married to him, carrying around the title “Mrs. Quinn.” I bit my lip, my smile was quickly fading.

I wanna take ya home
I wanna take ya home

I started to feel an anger building inside me. Why hadn’t I thought about this before? He was in a band now. Other girls were going to be throwing themselves at him. Other girls, girls so much skinnier than me, so much prettier than me, so much more talented. My body went cold. What if he met someone else? Someone who made him happier? Girls would be throwing themselves at him, he’d have his pick.

Damn, this girl, can’t find nobody like her
She is everything I want and I’d do anything for her
I’d beg, beg, and beg
Make me believe that there is no one else I need
When you satisfy me

I felt sick. The first night he goes on stage after getting this record deal, his life will change forever. I’ve seen him at school. I’ve heard the things girls have said about him. Of course he’s talented enough to be that big, but his looks will take him a long way. I’ve never seen anyone with his eyes his, or a smile that could make your heart melt the second he flashed you his pearly white teeth. He was cute and sexy all at the same time, and that’s what sells. That’s what makes someone famous.

I’ll take you home
We can be alone
And let my body show you lovin’ like its never ever known

I got up. I couldn’t take this anymore. I hate this idea now. I hated the idea of him traveling all over, just to swoon over other girls. I hated the fact that everyone will get to see him the way I see him. I hated the idea of sharing him. I’ve never been selfish, but Kellin was mine.
And I didn’t intend on sharing him with anyone.