My Only One

Jaime's POV

Nothing in life ever really prepares you for a heart-break.

Each time is new and unexpected, and all those walls you built up to protect yourself mean nothing now, all because you let one person in. You let one person slip inside your barriers because like a fool you trusted them. And nothing prepares you for when they stab you in the back.

Sometimes, you think you really know someone. Then, you start to believe every word they say. Then, you start to need them, and like them. And then, like a moth to a flame, you're drawn in until you get burnt, and the fire kills you.

You fall in love with them. You give them your heart, and once they have it, they tear it to pieces.

And then you're expected to carry on, and to pick up the pieces and fix yourself. Rebuild your walls, harden your heart that is still hurting from the past, try not to let it happen again.

Then, you're doing amazing at that.

But then, you fall for the same trap all over again.

And this time, it's even worse.

_

I nibbled on my lip, glancing over at the little Yoda plush with Tony's music-schooling acceptance letter (a program he wanted to get in very badly) and chuckled at how corny I was. On it was a note that read "To my little turtle, I love you so much. And, may the course be with you."

Chuckling audibly, I turned up my stereo, blasting my Nirvana CD (which I admittedly had no idea where it came from) and singing along to one I happened to be familiar with. The song played on while I sang happily along, "I'll take advantage while you hang me out to dry", waiting out the short drive to Tony's.

And sure enough, by the end of the track I was pulling in the drive way, finishing out the last line before turning off the car. Grabbing my gift, I hummed along and decided to surprise Tony with my visit, sneaking inside. His parents were home but before they could great me I put a finger to my mouth.

His mother cheekily grinned, mouthing "Oh" and his dad simply chuckled lightly. I nodded to them, loving that they approved of me as I tip-toed up the staircase. My teeth caught my lip as I walked, nibbling anxiously. I knew how excited this would make him, and I loved that his parents let me deliver the news.

But my eye brows knitted together as I heard some noises coming from his room, so fear kicked in and against my better judgement I burst through the door, making sure he wasn't hurt. But the bastard definitely didn't look like he was in pain.

Horrified, my eyes scanned the scene. A shirtless guy straddling his hips, leaning over him, their lips attached. I heard a faint moan from Tony and a familiar stinging started around my eyes. No. This couldn't be happening. Not again.

But it was. They hadn't even noticed me and David was still planting kisses all over Tony's body, and he was simply purring, encouraging it, until David started kissing down his chest. He ducked his head to do so, and when he did, Tony's eyes fluttered open to meet mine. All looks of bliss in his eyes disappeared.

"F-fuck!" Tony yelped, pushing David off the bed, earning an confused grunt from him until his eyes found me at the doorway, tears flowing freely down my cheeks. I clenched the Yoda doll a bit in my hands. I couldn't move, couldn't even think or breathe. "Jaime, t-this isn't what it looks like."

Letting out a mangled sob, I dropped my head to the floor. All emotion began to drain from me. That's it, I thought, I don't feel like fighting anymore.

"What is it then, Tony? It can't possibly be what you promised me you'd never do. I thought you weren't Vic, but you're worse." My voice was monotone, bored even. "I suppose I should've saw this coming. But I didn't."

"Jaime, please." He begged, crying now and beginning to sit up.

"Tony, don't bother. Actually, I'm sorry to interrupt. Oh, by the way, you were accepted into that music program. I was sent to tell you. Here," I tossed it to him, hardly crying anymore. "I hope you like the plush; I know you like Star Wars. It was nice to see you, David. See you, Tony."

With a calm and collected composure, I shut the door, and simply walked downstairs and out the door, hearing footsteps and screams behind me, and earning confused looks from his parents. Sadly, before I could reach my car, Tony grabbed my shoulder. "Please, Jaime. Fucking please. Look at me. Look at me, god dammit!"

"Tony," my voice cracked as I struggled to keep my composure. "I've seen this once already. I don't want to go through this again. I worked so hard to get happy again after the thing with Vic, and two years of progress just melted away. And what's worse is I think I hate you, and I should, but part of me still loves you. But honestly, if I'm being truthful with myself..."

I trailed off, turning around. "Fuck you, Tony. You're a liar, and a hypocrite. You're everything you claim you're not and being around you is making me sick." I was still monotone, and even as his crying increased I didn't back down. "But then again, you're amazing and I'm nothing. So I can see why. I don't blame you, Tony. I wish I did, but I blame myself."

"Jaime this-"

"Stop." I jumped in the car, starting it up and ignoring his yells for me to stay, driving out of there. I didn't know where I was going, and I didn't care.

All I knew was I felt like I was dying, and I didn't even care.