Shield Me From the Storms

My eyes opened naturally the next morning and I smiled in content. Weekends, when I wasn’t forced awake before my body was ready, were the best. “Morning,” a voice behind me whispered and everything suddenly came rushing back to me and I realised where I was. I was in bed with Josh, we’d had sex the night before. I’d actually been able to make love to my boyfriend; something I thought I’d never be brave enough to try. I turned slowly in Josh’s arms and looked up into his hazel eyes.
“Hey,” I whispered, quickly pecking his lips but not parting my lips because I didn’t want to risk my morning breath ruining the moment.
“Are you okay?” he asked, looking at me in concern. I smiled and nodded, wishing he wouldn’t look at me like that. But at the same time, it was comforting to know he worried about me.
“I ache a little,” I said with a blush. Josh’s hand went to my lower back and massaged gently and I blushed. I rested my head against Josh’s shoulder and closed my eyes for a few more minutes, revelling in the fact that I didn’t have to wake up, that I could let my body recharge completely and not risk a seizure. Speaking of which, I needed to take my medication. I sighed heavily before rolling over to find my jeans and the bottle of pulls in the left pocket. I kind of liked that I didn’t need to hide or be secretive about taking my medication any more. It felt really good to know that Josh knew everything about me – even the bad stuff – and he was actually still here. I pulled out the bottle and quickly swallowed two pills before turning back to Josh who was smiling at me gently. He opened his arms to me once again and I grinned before leaning back into his embrace.

We lay there for a while, not saying but, just drifting in and out of sleep and cuddling close together. That’s probably why I felt the onset of a seizure – my brain wasn’t sure whether it was supposed to be awake or asleep. “Josh,” I whispered, taking a deep breath and closing my eyes in the hopes that it would pass.
“It’s okay, baby,” Josh whispered, taking my hand in his. “I’m not going anywhere.” I opened my eyes and looked up at him, calm for a moment, before the seizure hit. My body spasmed and I lost consciousness for a moment.

When I came back to, I opened my eyes and realised that Josh had moved to sit by my head and had cushioned my head on his lap. My heart melted slightly at the expression on his face. He was concerned and worried but he also loved me. “Are you okay?” I whispered and Josh smiled at me tenderly.
“Me? I’m fine, are you?” he asked and I nodded, closing my eyes once again. Josh’s hand went to my hair and stroked through the strands gently. “I love you,” he whispered and I couldn’t help but smile. He’d stuck around this time during a seizure and he still loved me…I could hardly believe how lucky I was.
“I never really thought I’d find someone who would accept me like you have,” I whispered, opening my eyes and looking up at him.
“People are stupid if they didn’t accept you,” Josh said softly. “I accept you and I love you. I always will.”
“I love you too,” I whispered and Josh leant down and pressed a kiss to my lips. I didn’t worry about the morning breath that time, I just enjoyed it.

We spent the rest of the day lazing about at Josh’s house. His mother’s nurse arrived and took his mother to a doctor’s appointment, so we had the house to ourselves for a while, which was nice, though all we did was sit in the living room and watch television. We made French Toast for breakfast/lunch and ate as we watched Scrubs reruns. It was the most relaxing day I think I’d ever had, because I wasn’t stressing over having to hide my medication or worry about what would happen if I had a seizure.

I helped Josh with his pets as well. I fed the cats while Josh fed the dogs and then we went outside and fed and mucked out Stevie. It was pretty gross work, but I let Josh do that, I just stroked his nose. I was amazed that Josh found the time to look after all his pets, but I knew he wanted to be a vet, so I guess it was just automatic for him by then. Once Stevie’s stable was fresh and clean, we went back into the house. “I think I’m gonna go have a shower,” Josh said and I turned to him.
“I think I’ll join you,” I grinned and Josh just smirked as he took my hand and led me up to the bathroom. Although I’d sounded confident, once we were in the bathroom, I was suddenly nervous. Yes, we’d been naked the night before, but that was different. I bit my lip as I watched Josh turn the water on and wondered whether I could actually change my mind.
“You okay?” Josh whispered, wrapping his arms around my waist and holding me against his body.
“Hmm,” I hummed, resting my head on his shoulder. I didn’t need to be nervous or insecure around Josh. He loved me. if he could see passed the seizures, I was pretty sure that nothing else would put him off more than that. I pulled my shirt over my head and Josh’s gaze moved down over my body, making me shiver. I took a deep breath and then pushed my sweats and boxers down to my feet before jumping under the hot water. I turned and looked at Josh through the fogged glass door of the shower only to find him staring at me. “You joining me?” I asked with a grin, apparently snapping Josh out of whatever thoughts he was having. He quickly stripped out of his clothes and got behind me in the shower. He wrapped his arms around my middle once again and pulled me back against his body. I grinned as I felt how hard he was against my lower back. “I thought you wanted a shower?” I asked, turning around and looking up at him.
“I’m pretty sure we can do both,” he grinned, lowering his lips to mine, pushing me back against the cold tiles, making me gasp in shock. I quickly got over it, however, and ground my hips against his, drawing a moan from the back of his throat. I grinned into the kiss. That shower was easily the best shower of my life.

--

When we went to school the following Monday, Sophia immediately noticed that something had changed between us. “Ooh, so what happened once you left my house, huh?” she grinned with a wink. “I’m guessing you weren’t sick after all?” I looked at Josh, who was actually blushing. His arm was around my waist resting on my hip and had found it’s way under my shirt to stroke my skin.
“Did you tell her?” I asked and he quickly shook his head.
“He didn’t have to,” Sophia said, “I can just tell. Couples are always more touchy-feely after they have sex.” I suddenly realised that, yeah, we were, but I kinda liked it. Alright, I liked it a lot. “So ready for English?” she asked and we both nodded before following her down the hallway towards the classroom.

“Do you wanna do something tonight?” Josh asked at lunch and I turned and smiled at him.
“What were you thinking?” I asked and he shrugged.
“Dinner and go to the cinema,” he suggested and I nodded.
“Sounds good,” I said, leaning into his side and pressing a quick kiss to his jaw. I was glad that even though we’d had sex that wasn’t what our lives were revolving around. I had heard that once a couple has sex, that’s al they did. But I didn’t want that. Sure, sex with Josh had been great, mind-blowing even, and I was more than happy to repeat the experience, but it was still going to be a nerve-wracking activity for me for a while and I wanted to spend time with Josh doing other stuff too. I didn’t know whether Josh knew that or if he was just being his kind and considerate self and recognising that I wanted more than constant sex. Maybe he wanted that too. Because I knew that this relationship wasn’t going to be a fleeting thing, it was going to be for life and I wanted the deep and meaningful stuff just as much as I wanted the physical stuff.

Later that evening, after we’d had dinner and been to see the newest film in the cinemas, Josh drove us back to my house. “Do you wanna stay over?” I whispered as we stayed sat in his car.
“Yeah,” he grinned, leaning over to kiss me.
“I love you, Josh,” I whispered, resting my forehead against his. “So much.”
“I love you, too, Dani,” Josh replied gently, pressing a gentle kiss to my lips.
“Let’s just stay here for a minute,” I said, moving closer to him and curling into his side. Josh happily wrapped his arms around me and held me tight against him. I closed my eyes and sighed in content. Yeah, I could very happily stay here for the rest of my life. In fact, I intended to.