Lost in This Hell

“Are you sure you want to get a tattoo?” Johnny looks nervous. But shouldn’t I be nervous I mean this is my first tattoo. And its gonna go across the top of my back. Its going to hurt and he is the one who is nervous.

“Yea I wanted to get it done for a while.”

“How are you going to get it done, I mean your only 17?”

I pulled out my wallet and showed him the fake Id I had made.

“My friend knows a guy who makes fake Id’s, but don’t worry it says im 18.”

“Why not 21?” Johnny pulled up to the tattoo parlor he was telling me about and stopped the car.

“I don’t want to drink. I just want to get cigarettes, piercings and tattoos. That’s it.”

Johnny looks at me like im crazy, which I just might be.

“Well you have to be crazy to willing get in a car with Short Shit behind the wheel.”

Stop making fun of his height, Jimmy.

“Im not making fun of his height, only his driving skills.”

Bullshit you said it before. ‘You shouldn’t get in the car with Johnny, he can’t see over the wheel.’

“Ok maybe I did say that but it is true.”

Hey im shorter than him and I can see over the wheel perfectly fine.

“That’s because you can drive. Oh and Johnny just asked why don’t you want to drink. Make something up, he doesn’t know about your brothers.”

“I just don’t like the taste of alcohol.” I faked shuddering and felt really guilty about it.

“He will understand once you tell him everything.”

Why would I tell him everything?

“So you have someone else who can help you.”

But I have you to do that.

“But I might not be here forever, Sweetheart.”

What you might leave me for real?

“I might have to, sweetheart. It isn’t because I want to remember that. I would never leave you unless I have to.”

Jimmy you can’t leave me.

“Im not going to leave you right now, Sweetheart. Im still here always. But it’s time for your tattoo, sweetie.”

I love you Jimmy.

“As I love you, Sweetheart.”

I look up at Johnny when he opens my car door. I place my hand in his and step out of the car. I grab my bag and walk over to the front door. I walk in with Johnny right behind. I looked around the shop amazed at how wonderful it looks.

“Hey Mr. Johnny Christ, how may I help you today.” I looked over to see the beautiful tatted up Kat Von D.

“My friend, Alexa would like to get a tattoo.” Johnny said while motioning for me to join him. I walk over to them and look up at Kat.

“Hey Alexa, do you know what you want?” I nodded my head and dug through my bag for my sketchpad and turned to the
picture I wanted tattooed to my skin. I gave the picture to Kat and she looked at it. “Did you draw this yourself?” I nodded again. “This is amazing; I don’t even have to fix it up. Just take off your hoodie and follow me.” I took off my hoodie and let my black tank top show. I handed my hoodie and bag to Johnny and follow Kat to the back room. I pushed Johnny out of the room when he tried to walk in behind. I shook my head and shut the door behind me. “You don’t want Johnny with you?” I shook my head and took off my tank top so she can get to my back. I turned around and she gasped when she saw the scars on my back. “Now I see why you didn’t want Johnny here.” I nodded and lay down on my stomach. I crossed my arms and placed my chin on them. I felt Kat UN snap my bra and move it out of the way.



I talked to Kat for the whole 3 hours she did my tattoo. It didn’t really hurt when I was talking to Kat. I guess it was because I wasn’t focusing on the pain. Kat place the lotion and bandage over my tattoo, and then she was nice enough to help me with my tank top. I follow her into the main room and she helps me with my hoodie. I grab the money my dad gave me and paid Kat for my tattoo.

“Wait Kat do you think you can pierce my lip?”

She smiles and waves her hand for me to follow. Johnny sits on the counter near where Kat took me so she can pierce my lip.

“Do you a stud or hoop?”

I didn’t know which one to choose.

“Get the hoop; you would look cuter with it then the stud.”

“I want a hoop.” I smile up at her while she gets the gun ready.

“1... 2… 3.” She pressed the trigger and now I had a hole in my lip. She quickly clips the hoop together and cleans up. “Done.” We walk back over to the cash register and paid again. Kat tells me how to take care of my tattoo and piercing. I hugged Kat and walked out the door with Johnny behind me.

“How do you feel?” Johnny asks once we get into his car.

“Im fine why am I supposed to feel different?”

“No im just asking if you lip or back hurts?” Johnny starts the car and pulls into the traffic and heads back to Huntington.

“No Kat did a really good job with the pain.”

“Good because Leana would kill me if you were in pain.”

I laugh and close my eyes. I fall asleep to Matt singing Afterlife.



I wake up when I felt Johnny unclip my seatbelt. I look up at him sleepily. I hook my arms around his neck and lean my head on his shoulder. Johnny walks up to Leana’s front door and knocks on it.

“What the fuck did you do to her face?!”

“Well she sounds happy.”