Lost in This Hell

Im here. Im finally in orange county. I actually made it. And I did it all by myself.

“Yea hi im still here ya know.”

I rolled my eyes and shook my head. “Like I could ever forget about you Jimmy.”

“Well I wanted to make sure. You haven’t been talking to me lately.”

“Dude you’re just a voice in my head. You’re not alive anymore.”

“Dude im not just a voice in your head. Im your guardian angel. I thought we discussed this.”

“No we didn’t, you dumnuts. You never told me that you’re my guardian angel. That would’ve been better then thinking that im going crazy.”

“Oh but you are my sweet. Everyone is crazy one way or another.”

“Oh shut up already.”

“Fine you won’t hear a pip out of me anymore.”

“Fine then.”

What did I just do? Am I that much of an idiot? I just sent away the one person I need. I have to get him back inside my head; I don’t know what I would do without him.



“Jimmy?”

No answer

“Jimmy please im sorry.”

Still nothing.

“Jimmy please I need you.”

I start cry when I realized Jimmy really did leave me. Why did I have to be so mean to him?

I pull the car over at a park so the dogs can run around some. I buy a cup of coffee from a vender and walk to one of the benches. I sit down and try to mentally will Jimmy back into my head.

After 2 hours in the park with not even a sound from Jimmy, I drag my feet back to the car. I help Rocky into the back and shut the door after Sinbad gets in.

I drive around still trying to get Jimmy back when I noticed the Huntington Beach Cemetery. I park the car and walk through the cemetery with the dogs. I ask the person working there if she knew where James Sullivan was buried and she pointed me in the directions she seen a lot of ‘punk kids’ going. I rolled my eyes and started to walk in the direction she pointed too. I stopped when I saw one of the names on the grave stones.

James Owen Sullivan.

Well here is my hero’s body.

“Jimmy im sorry I didn’t mean to tell you to shut up. I need you with me. I can’t live without, you are my hero. I would still be in the hell hole I called a life if it wasn’t for you. Please some back here.”

I sat there with my dogs on either side of me. We sat there for almost 20 minutes in silence.

“Oh shit what in the bucket.” I smiled hugely when I heard Jimmy say the first line of my favorite song

“What’s in the bucket?”

“But a bucket of shit.”

“But a bucket of grapes.”

“And grapes in the mouth.”

“And the grapes in the mouth.”

“Make you happy down south.”

“Make you get a big boner.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Im going to apologize. I really am sorry Jimmy.”

I had tears running down my face already. I didnt know how much I really did need Jimmy till he was gone.

“I know you are Sweetheart. I forgive you. But I had to make you come here somehow.”

“Why did you want me here?”

“You had to meet someone.”

“Who?”

"He is behind you."

“Hey who are you?”

I shot up and looked behind me. I gasp when I saw who was behind me.