Take One Last Breath

..::Austin’s POV::..

I went through range of emotions that I couldn’t even pick out which ones I went through. They could all be summed up in “what the fuck?”, though. I opened my mouth to speak, closed it, opened it again, and then walked out in frustration from the fact that I didn’t even have words. My cousin who does a lot of dumb shit was making out with my best friend. I was set on being mad about it, but I knew I wouldn’t have a place to get mad seeing as I ditched the country with my apparent husband. I drug my feet up the stairs, until I heard Ville call down for me. My eyebrows knitted together in confusion as I changed direction, and headed towards his voice. I walked into the kitchen, which was now relatively cleaner than it was earlier. I sat up on the counter, and he handed me a glass of water.

“How are you feeling,” He asked as I took the glass from him.

“Not good. I feel like I need to get clean again, when all I really wanna do is shoot drugs up my veins,” I admitted, and he stepped forward, close enough for me to rest my chin on his shoulder, “what’s wrong with me?” I asked, feeling grief.

“There’s nothing wrong with you. You’ve just got a slight problem,” He grabbed my shoulders, and stepped back to look at me, “and I know you can get better. You just have to want to,” he gave me a small smile, which I couldn’t help but return. He always knew exactly what to say. Quickly, my smile turned into a frown, and Ville looked at me questioningly, “What’s wrong, dear? You look like your hamster just died.”

“Seeing a dead hamster would be less nauseating than seeing my best friend and cousin making out together in a bed. I don’t even want to know about it right now. I just wonder if Missy knows,” I sighed, and he frowned along with me.

“You know, I could never stand Missy,” he said, and I laughed a bit.

“You start out to like her, and then she just gets annoying,” I said, noticing how quickly he had made me feel better.

“Oh, that reminds me. Did you know Novak’s secretly in love with you, or something?” he asked, and I looked up at him, cocking my head to the side.

“I knew he liked me, why?” I asked, and he chuckled

“Because apparently I’ve done enough. Then he stormed off after you,” he informed me, and a raised an eyebrow. That must have been right before he was banging on the bedroom door, and begging me to let him in.

“Austin?” Ville and I looked over to Kori, who was standing in the doorway, “Can I have a minute?” she asked, and I looked back at Ville. He kissed me on the forehead before leaving Kori and I alone. She looked like she had seen a ghost as she walked over to me, jumping to sit on the counter, “What you saw in…” she started, her voice soft and quiet. I didn’t want to know what I saw in there, so I quickly cut her off.

“I really am not concerned,” I pointed out, “Just don’t get caught, and don’t let him hurt you. I’m willing to put all of this behind us,” I looked up at her, and a slight smile twitched at her lips. She threw her arms around me, and I couldn’t help but to hug her back.

“I missed you so much,” she mumbled into the hug, and I could feel my eyes pooling with tears again.

“I missed you too,” I admitted, and looked back, “and I felt horrible every second. But you know how important my dad was to me. It wasn’t just somebody’s death. I’d react just as badly if you had died. I…I didn’t mean for all of this to happen. I just wanted to go see my home,” I wiped off the tears I hadn’t noticed were falling down my face. She nodded and looked at me with a sorrowful look.

“I know. I guess I’m just mad at how worried I was that your life was on the line,” she admitted, “and that you ruined all of your hard work. You’ve done so good, and now…”

“So I know I can get better again, and this can be a lesson. I’m sorry I worried you,” I apologized.

“Just…be more careful next time,” she warned, and I nodded, “And I think Novak is secretly in love with you,” she said, causing me to laugh.

“That’s what Ville said, ironically,” I laughed, leaning back on my arms, “You don’t think it’s true, do you?” I looked at her, my voice getting lower. She looked at me, and laughed.

“I don’t know. After you told us about you and Ville getting married, he’s seemed pretty bitter since,” she said, and I shook the thought from my head.

“Maybe he just never liked Ville. That’s all,” I shrugged it off.

“Which leads me to my last question,” she said, and I looked at her, cocking my head to the side.

“Yeah?” I asked, and she swallowed heavily.

“Are you coming back home?” her voice was thick, and I pursed my lips. I hadn’t really thought about going back, or anybody there, really. What all did I have back in the states? Some crazy cousin with crazy ass friends, one of which likes me a little too much. My best friend. My home. But here, I had Ville, who I was starting to like quite a lot, and he cared for me. He wanted to help me get better. But so did Kori. But If I went home, there would be the fact that I knew about Bam’s affair with my best friend, on the other hand, I didn’t give two shits about Missy. I didn’t even give one, or half of one.

“I-I-I don’t….” I didn’t know what I wanted. I don’t even know why I wasn’t able to tell Kori that directly. Maybe it was because I didn’t want to disappoint her a second time, “I’m like a little lost bunny rabbit,” I pouted, and she frowned in return.

“We need to figure this out, Austin. We can’t just stay here and wait for you to make a decision. If you want to stay here, fine. But if you want to go home, you need to tell us. I miss you. And I need you,” she said, and I sighed.

“But I’m married to Ville. Just leaving would prove sort of difficult,” I said, and now blew out the breath she had been holding.

“That is sort of a problem,” she muttered, then her face lit up, “Unless he suddenly went missing. Then all of your problems would be solved,” she started seeming a little too excited, which in return sort of scared me. I shook my head with a smirk on my lips.

“Leave Ville alone. I’ll talk this through with him, and then I’ll come to a decision,” I promised her, and it placed a smile on her face.

“You do that. Do it now,” She ushered, hopping off of the counter, and pulling me down with her, “Get this sorted out. I have big news once we get back to the states,” she grinned over happily.

“Shit,” I muttered, almost scared of what it could be. We both walked out of the kitchen, but she instead walked back into the guest bedroom she was staying in, and I walked up the stairs, then running into Novak. I mentally threw myself over the staircase banister.

“Hey, are you feeling alright?” He shot me a solemn smile, and I nodded.

“Yeah, I’m great. I just…gotta talk to Ville,” I said, and his smile fell a bit before it was back on his face.

“Alright,” he said quietly before giving me a hug and backing off. I continued up the steps and down the hallway until I came up to the door leading to where Ville was, in the room we shared. All of the sudden, I felt a little bit nervous. I took a deep breath before I walked through the door and saw Ville sitting at the end of the bed, reading a book from the large bookshelf. He looked up as I approached him, sitting down, and leaning into his figure.

“You feeling okay?” He asked with a small chuckle, which made my heart fall. It was then, because I felt so bad, that I knew I had to go home. I just felt like a heartless bitch for just leaving him here like this. I looked up to him, looking into his green eyes. This time, my stomach dropped. I had all of the words on the tip of my tongue, I just had no nerves to say them out loud, “you want to go home,” he stated. I nodded before resting my head on his shoulder, just as he rested his head on my own, “I understand. Bam is your family, Kori is your best friend. I’ll send you the papers once I can get my hands on them,” he said, and I felt more tears coming up, just as I thought I had let them all out.

“It’s harder to just leave then I thought it would be,” I managed to say, and he kissed me on the crown of my head.

“It’s alright, dear. I’ll get by. I’ll come and visit you, we can be friends, since we seemed to skip that step,” he laughed, causing a sad smile to appear on my face.

“I’ll miss how you always say the right thing,” I looked back up at him, “Everybody at home is stupid and they don’t say very nice things at all. Except Kori. Well…the mean things she says are in a loving way. Or so she tells me…” I trailed off. His laugh interrupted my thoughts as he got up.

“No, I think you and I both know it’s just because I’m sexy,” he clarified, causing me to burst out in laughter. He had made this extremely easy on me.

“Very,” I purred, leaning in to catch a kiss, but thought better of it. I covered up the lean with a deep and warm hug, taking his scent in. As I pulled back, I got up, and looked to him, “Now I just got to go tell Kori, and hope I don’t walk in on them making out. I’m lucky I survived it a first time, who knows if I will a second,” I said, and he smiled.

“What about Missy?” He asked, and I shrugged.

“Who the fuck knows,” I said, before turning on my heel, and leaving the room. I nearly ran down the hall and slid down the banister, just to fall backwards onto my ass, “Fucking ow,” I hissed before I got up, and walked to the guest bedroom. I knocked on the door before getting the okay to come in, and saw that Kori was alone in the room. I shut the door behind her, and she smiled at me.

“So?” She asked, and I shrugged, sitting down on the bed, and then sitting back up. Kori and Bam had been in this bed together. There was no touching it.

“I’m going home,” I told her, and she pulled me into an embrace I’m sure would have killed me if she didn’t let go when she did.

“Thank god. I was beginning to think you would stay here for Ville,” she admitted, and I half smiled.

“Would you be mad if I told you I almost did?” I asked, and she nodded furiously.

“Yeah, so don’t tell me you were considering it,” she grinned, and I rolled my eyes.

“Whatever,” I said, smirking.

©Shannon.