Reckless & Relentless

It was the final episode of American Idol, and the boys in Of Mice & Men were watching it intently. They'd been watching it since one girl, Cassie Crawley, had sang their song My Understandings, playing an acoustic version on her guitar. All of them were extremely proud of Cassie for making it as far as she had, and they were rooting for her from Austin's house, which was just a few cities away from where she was performing.

The other finalist had already sang, and they watched intently as she came onto the stage, a tiny smile on her face. The stage lights glinted off of her Monroe piercing and the stud in her nose, and Cassie's smile widened slightly. This time, she didn't have her guitar; there was nothing but a microphone in her hand.

Phil leaned forward in his seat, and the rest of the guys did the same as Cassie began to sing Fun.'s Some Nights.

"Some nights, I stay up cashing in my bad luck
Some nights, I call it a draw
Some nights, I wish that my lips could build a castle
Some nights, I wish they'd just fall off," Cassie's voice was loud and clear through the microphone, and she hit every note perfectly throughout the song. And as it came to an end, they could see the rise and fall of her chest as she breathed in deeply.

The judges complimented the performance, and she stepped off the stage after thanking them. It cut to a commercial break, and Phil was the first one to speak out of all five guys, who were still silent.

"Wow," Phil murmured. "She's amazing. No wonder she's made it this far."

Austin nodded his agreement. "Damn, she's fucking diverse, too. She's sang Fun., our songs, Pierce The Veil, Crown The Empire, Sleeping With Sirens, The Summer Set, Paramore, Adele. Cassie's amazing. She deserves to win. That other guy just sang country," ranted Austin, and all the guys nodded their agreement.

"That and Cassie can play guitar, bass and piano," commented Alan, and Tino nodded.

"Shit, if we ever meet her, I'm teaching her to play drums, because then she can be her own fucking band," Tino joked, and the other guys chuckled.

Shayley's eyes were still glued to the screen. "You think Rise might sign her? If they don't I bet Fueled By Ramen will snatch her up, or maybe Hopeless," he said, completely off topic from what the rest of them were talking about.

Phil opened his mouth to comment, but snapped it shut as the commercial break ended with the American Idol intro music, going back to the show. It showed the two finalists clutching each other's hands on the stage, the judges calm smiles as they stood beside the two nervous contestants, the announcer holding the envelope that contained the name of the winner.

"And, the winner of this year's American Idol is..." the announcer paused for an agonizingly long period of time. The guys all were practically out of their seats, leaning towards the TV in Austin's living room.

"Cassie Crawley!" the announcer finally exclaimed, and the guys all cheered, Austin jumping up and putting his hands in the air, spinning in a joyous circle.

"Fuck yeah!" cheered Shayley, the rest of the guys echoing him. They watched as the other finalist, Dawson James, pulled Cassie into a tight hug, her hands still covering her mouth and tears in her eyes.

"Someone fucking call Rise, tell them to get to her first," Tino yelled, and Alan leaped out of his seat, darting for his phone, which was sitting on the kitchen counter.



As Cassie was pulled backstage again, she felt the tears spilling over. Pulling her phone out of her pocket, Cassie figured out what time it was in Oklahoma, before she dialed her home number, waiting as it rang. Cassie was praying her father wasn't home yet, and if his hours were still the same, he wasn't.

"Hello?" her mother's voice answered on the third ring, the familiar Oklahoma twang causing more tears to fall from Cassie's eyes.

"Mama?" whispered the 21-year old woman, and heard the sharp intake of breath on the other end of the line.

"Your father told you not to call here again, Cassandra," her mother hissed back. "Do you know what would happen if he found out you called?"

Cassie inhaled shakily. "I'm sorry, Mama, I just wanted to tell you... I won. I made it, I did what Daddy said I never could," she said, voice soft, and heard her mother sigh softly.

"Cassie, I'm so proud of you. If your daddy was in his right mind, he would be, too," her mother murmured back. "I gotta go, baby, he just got home. I love you, Cassie."

Cassie heard the line go dead, and she sighed softly. She could only talk to her mother when her father wasn't home; as soon as she'd dropped out of college to pursue her dream of becoming a performing artist, he had told her she wasn't his daughter, and to never near his house again.

Her father had let her get away with tattoos and piercings, saying piercings can be taken out and healed over, and tattoos can be covered, but when she dropped out of college he was more angry than Cassie had ever seen him. She shuddered just remembering it.

It had been a Wednesday night, and Cassie had come home for dinner with her parents, just like she always did. Figuring it was now or never for telling them what she had done and was now planning, Cassie set down her fork and knife on the table, leaving half of her steak.

"Mama, Daddy..." Cassie started, looking between their faces. "I need to tell you something. Just... Please don't get angry," the last part was directed towards her father, who's eyes narrowed.

"Cassie, what have you done now?" he asked, green eyes narrowed in annoyance at dinner being interrupted for negative talk.

Cassie inhaled deeply, and looked at her mother's calm face, her eyes telling Cassie it would be okay, just get it out now. "I'm auditioning for American Idol tomorrow, and if I make it, I'm dropping out of school," she said, speaking rapidly to get the words out.

Watching as her father's face got more and more red, Cassie could feel her hands trembling on her lap. She was terrified of what he was going to do. In his last fit of rage, he'd slapped her hard enough to split her lip. Cassie's mother stood up, going to stand by Cassie's father and rest her hand on his shoulder.

"James, calm down," Cassie heard her mother's soft voice attempting to soothe her father before anything too bad could happen. She was too late though.

"Calm down? Calm down?" he demanded, turning on Cassie's mother. "She's fucking dropping out of school and you want me to 'calm down'?" Cassie's father shouted. "We never should have given her that fucking guitar! Never! Never should have let her take those music classes at OSU! And, I let her, all because of you!" By now, Cassie's father was jabbing his finger in her mother's chest, his voice rising at every word.

Cassie shook her head, trying to clear it of those memories. She made it, Cassie knew she should be happy. But, for some reason, she wasn't.