Maybe I Wasn't Enough

I was bouncing my knee, and picking at the think layer of skin on my lips. I was so nervous. Not only was I nervous, but I was scared. I had never felt so alone. My mom obviously hated me, and I wasn't sure what to do. I don't want someone to tell me that everything's going to be okay. I don't want someone to tell me that I need to apologize to my mom. I want someone to simply wrap their arms around me, and tell me that they loved me. That's all I wanted. Everything was so mixed up. My life was mixed up.

I got up, and walked outside. I needed some air. I could feel the ball of anxiety in my chest becoming larger and larger as I realized how alone I really was. I sighed, as a few tears trickled down my cheeks. I wiped the away with the sleeve of the hoodie, and stared at the door across from me. I slid down the side of the house, and pulled my knees up to my chest. I bit my lip, and tried my hardest to stop crying.

After what had seemed hours later, Tony walked out of the door across the street. I stood up, and our eyes met, he gave me a reassuring smile, which made it a little bit easier to breath. I wasn't sure what I would do without him.

"Here." He said, handing me an envelope.
I took it in my hands, and put it in my back pocket, as if it was nothing. "Was she okay? Did you find out if he hurt her?" I swarmed Tony with questions.
He smiled again. "She's fine. A little shaken up, but she's okay. She know's that you're 18, and you can take care of yourself. No, he didn't hurt her. But she wants you to read that letter." I hugged him, and nuzzled my face into his neck. His heartbeat was steady, which made me feel even more secure.
We walked back into the house, and I sat on the sofa.
"Izzy, you need to sleep." Tony said.
I shook my head. "I'm fine." I lied.
He sighed. "I know you, Iz. Sleep. You need it."
I smiled slightly, as he climbed upon the sofa, and I layed my head on his lap.

He was so perfect. Everything about him. From his smile that could illuminate an entire room, to his laugh that made my heart clench.

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(Tony's P.O.V)

"Izzy, get up." Mike said, throwing a pillow at her.
"Mike, let her sleep. She was up all night." I said, stroking her hair.
He glared at me. "Was she fucking you?" He asked. His voice couldn't hide the anger behind his eyes.
"Dude, she went to the hospital to get her wrist checked out. Calm the fuck down." I said.
"No, I won't 'calm the fuck down'! You slept with her, didn't you!? You knew I liked her!" He screamed.
"Mike! I didn't do anything!" I stated.
He sighed, and sat sat at her feet. "I'm sorry." he began. "I just...I like her. I think she's perfect..."
A ball of anger formed in the pit of my stomach.
What was I thinking? He was my friend. If he liked her, he could have her. Plus: Mike and Izzy where the same age.

I knew he was better for her, but I wanted her. I noticed how perfect she was. Her flaws made her unique. She had trust issues, but she trusted me. I trusted her too, of coarse. She was just so perfect. And her perfection was tearing me apart.