If You Only Knew

I seen Gerard get punched. I jumped off the bed and ran to him. I seen who was at the door. I couldn't fucking believe it. "Did you seriously think we let you get away," Darrell and Jimmy laughed loudly. I grabbed Gerard and pulled him against me. "We don't want him, we want you." They glared at me and I saw them drag my dads body into the room. I screamed and cried. "You really think your dad would shoot himself," they chuckled. Jimmy closed the door and turned to Darrell. They grab me by my shirt and threw me on the bed. I fought back and they grabbed my leg and squeezed the shit out of it. I cried out, they grabbed my wrists and tied me to the headboard. "Tell me where's your dads stash." I gave them a puzzled look. They smacked me, what the fuck is this about? "Your dad has a stash where is it?" they ask again,. I shrugged, "I have no idea what you are talking about." They became angry and slapped me again. "Don't give me the right answer again, next time it's up your ass!" I begged not to. Jesus Christ I can't go a day without someone raping me! "I honestly don't fucking know!" I scream at them. "Yes you do!" he grabbed my throat and started squeezing. I couldn't breathe and started coughing. I couldn't fight with my arms tied and him on my legs. I started feeling dizzy. "Darrell!! " Jimmy grabbed him, but he wouldn't let me go. Jimmy managed to get him off of me. I started choking an coughing up blood. "What the fuck Darrell! Are you fucking crazy!" he yelled at him. "He didn't answer me," Darrell replied. "Okay! But doesn't mean you have to kill him, he doesn't know, he doesn't know!" The way Darrell glared at him scared me. It seemed to me Darrell is the dominant of the two, he was the one who raped me, not Jimmy. Jimmy saved me from choking to death. Even though both scared me, I felt comfortable with Jimmy. I stared at them fighting. I saw Gerard stirring and moving slowly. He looked in pain and I wanted to help him so bad. Darrell or Jimmy didn't notice him because they're to busy fighting over my life. Gerard opened his eyes and looked straight at them...pissed as fuck.
-Gerard-
I wake up to shouting and opened my eyes. I saw Frankie tied to the bed. Like I said don't fuck with me when it comes to Frank. I got up and they finally realized I was up. I punched te taller one (Darrell) because he busted my lip. The other backed off and went to go untie Frank. I beat the shot out of the other one and would not stop this time. "GERARD STOP!" I heard Franks voice but ignored. I kept pounding at him, letting my anger all out. "GERARD PLEASE YOUR KILLING HIM!" I stopped and backed off of my destruction. His face was bruised and swollen. His lips were puffy and eyes weren't even able to open. "DARRELL!" the other guy ran to him. "You piece of shit you deserved this," he says through his tears. I looked at him and them Frank. He stared at them, he turned white. I finally figured out why...his mom. I grabbed him and hugged him tightly. "I'm so sorry Frankie." I kissed him and apologized. I can't even tell you how I feel right now... Nothing but regret. I started crying, this time Frank held me. I couldn't stop. "I'm sorry I put you through this," I say. "No! How dare you think that! It's not your fault Gerard its mine!" I state at him and shook my head no. I grabbed his hand and our bags. I left the two guys there...crying. We walked to my car and got in. We stayed silent. I see the look in his eyes. Sadness. I wanted to cry, poor Frank, he's bullied for being gay, his mom died from father beating her, his dad blowing his head off, beaten and abused, raped, cutting, and now he's just used and broken from everything. He started crying and broke down. I rubbed his back and said everything's gonna be okay. "NO IT'S NOT!" he yelled at me. "I'll make sure it is," I reply. He looks at me with doubt, I'm hurt to see him like this. I put the car in drive and headed home.
-Time Lapse-
We pulled in town. We parked in a parking lot and just say there in silence. He got out and stared at the sky. I watched him, he's so fragile. I got out and wrapped my arms around him. He put his head on my chest. "I'm out of tears," he says. That made me want to cry. "why cry for things that won't come back or go away? It'll always be with you no matter what. Just because it's not there doesn't mean it isn't real." I felt tears in my eyes and kissed his head. "I mean it's not like I could get my parents back or my virginity," he continues, "but I could get my life back." He looks deep into my eyes, "with you." I lost it and started crying. He held me and held me really tight.