Even Without Words

Kellin

I remember somebody grabbing me as I walked into the kitchen and I panicked a little because I knew it wasn’t Vic. I started trying to get out of their grip, but I couldn’t. They threw me into the back seat of their car and started speeding off.

After being pushed through the house, he tied me up after stripping off my clothes and he shoved a bandana or something in my mouth to keep me quiet. I recognized Eric and started panicking more. It got even worse when I saw him put a knife on the table.

“Hi Kellin,” He said with an evil smirk. “Do you know why you’re here?” I shook my head. “Because you took Vic from me and now I’m going to use you like I used to do to him. Except you might not like it so much.”

I was screaming at the top of my lungs as he pressed into me and tried desperately to get him out and get away. It hurt so much that I couldn’t stop the tears from falling down my face. He only slowed when we could hear a door open and he took the knife from the table before trailing it down my chest.

“You keep quiet or I’ll bury this between your ribs, you got it?” He threatened and I nodded weakly.

He and someone else outside the door were yelling at each other but I couldn’t tell who it was, or even what they were saying. All I know is someone barrelled into the room after breaking the door and tackled Eric off me, making the pain stop. I wanted to cry more when Vic ran in and untied me and took the gag out of my mouth. He got my boxers back on and wrapped a blanket around me.

“Did he hurt you baby?” Vic asked, all kind of emotions running through his eyes. I nodded and leaned against his chest while I cried. Eric was screaming and I realized it was Beau who had saved me. He kept Eric away until the police came and I saw Tony was there too. He must’ve been the one to call 911. I couldn’t stop shaking, even after the police had taken Eric away and offered me a ride to the hospital, I refused. I just wanted to go home with Vic.

Vic stopped to talk to Beau but it didn’t look like they were fighting. At least Vic wouldn’t get arrested too for starting a fight. The drive back home was quiet, I was shaking with my knees pulled up to my chest. Vic helped me into the house and to his room. I changed by myself into some pajama pants, a plain shirt that I was sure was Vic’s and the poncho, because I was cold and I thought it might stop the shaking. I walked back out, even though it hurt to walk and cuddled up next to Vic who absently played with my hair.

“I am so sorry Kells,” He said, sounding close to tears. “I should’ve never asked you to go to that party. This is all my fault.”

Still not trusting my voice, I shook my head and frowned up at Vic. This was not his fault. Vic, being the genius he was, handed me my notebook and a pen so I could write.
This is not your fault Vic. Don’t blame yourself, please?

“But it’s all kinds of my fault! I should’ve gone with you, I should’ve made sure you were safe. I should’ve at least checked if Eric was even there.”

Vic, stop it. No one could’ve known he would do that. You saved me tonight and that means so much to me. I love you.

“Baby, I’ll always come to your rescue,” he told me with a small smile. “No matter what it is. I’d give up my life for you, I love you that much.” I kissed him sweetly and settled back against his side.

Can you sing to me? I asked him timidly. He chuckled a little.

“Of course baby,” He told me and sang to me for the rest of the night, because it stopped the shaking.

The next morning, I woke up alone on Vic’s living room couch with a blanket draped over me. I tried to sit up but it hurt too much. I guess Vic must’ve heard the small squeak of pain I’d let out and came walking over to me with a plate in his hands.

“Here,” He said. “I can’t really cook, but I wanted to do something nice for you.”

You didn’t have to.

“Yes I did,” He said and set it on the table in front of me. “I know you’re hurting really bad right now.”

You’re too perfect for me. I saw him smirk.

“No, I’m not,” He argued. “I just want you to feel better.” I smiled and ate what he’d made, which was toast and eggs but I wasn’t going to complain. It was actually pretty good.

Vic let me lay my head in his lap all afternoon while we watched tv and his hands raked through my hair. We didn’t talk much, considering we both knew what had happened last night and neither of us really wanted to talk about it. But we kind of had to so I decided to start it.

“You know this doesn’t change anything with us right?” I asked, my voice scratchy from not being used.

“Of course not,” Vic said. “But tell me if I ever go too far, okay baby?”

“Always,” I replied. “But I know he’s not you. It’s not like I’m going to be scared of you Vic.”

“You are possibly the most resilient rape victim ever,” Vic said. “I’ll never let anyone touch you again but me.”

“I love you,” I told him honestly.

I was able to sit up at supper, although it was really uncomfortable. Vic was being perfect all day, since I couldn’t really do much. He was happy just to hang out and not do a lot and made me food and got snacks and stuff. I swear to god, I would’ve been hopeless without him. He ended up helping me down the stairs and we played video games. I was laying on the couch and he was sitting below me on the floor while we played. It was Mario Kart… I actually won once this time though! Eventually we got tired and Vic carried me up the stairs but it still hurt like crazy. Vic helped me get changed and I realised it was a mistake because he could see all the bruises Eric had left on me. There were handprints all over me but mostly on my neck and waist with a couple on my arms and legs from when he dragged me. My wrists were still raw from the rope he’d tied me up with. I didn’t expect Vic to pull me into his arms so quickly but he did and I just hugged him back while he cried. It was hard on both of us so I pulled Vic over to the bed.

“What’s wrong Vic?” I asked him quietly.

“I was just so close to losing you,” Vic gasped and stuttered. “I can’t handle the thought of what might’ve happened.” My heart broke a little bit.