Once Upon a Time...Fairy Tales Happened in Real Life. Not Now.

I stood there crying into Gerards chest. He was apologizing to me. I don't know what for, but I accepted them. "Frankie I'm so so so sorry," he continues. "It's okay," I reply. It's been about a good few minutes before my tears run dry. I let go of him and look at him. He seems so immaculate, proud, and obviously beautiful.

"I don't know why they always have to pick on me," I start, "they always target me if all people," he stood there listening to me. I told him how I feel all the time. How I feel useless and nothing to this world. How I feel very ugly and self-conscious. He kind of gasped at that statement. I pretended I didn't take notice. I told him how I'm abused everyday. Mentally, physically, and emotionally. He listened to every thing I said. Hanging on ti every word I say like its the last.

"Most of all its because I'm..." I stop. Shit Frank! You were so close! My heart began pounding and I've never felt so nervous around him. He waited for my next reply. I stood there like a dork staring at him with wide eyes. "Because why?" he finally asks. I gulped and continued looking at him.
"Uh...nothing," I finally say. He gives me a confused look. "Frank you could tell me..." He implies. I shake my head no. He doesn't need to know I'm gay.

My lip starts to quiver. I'm having a nervous breakdown. I feel the tingly sensation rising. He takes a step toward me. I back up almost afraid. I need to get away from him before I hurt him. As much as this will hurt me to say or do this, I don't want to his friend anymore. He takes another step toward me trying to reach out to me. I burst into tears and yell at him.

"You know what!! No! No! I shouldn't have told you anything! You don't deserve to know! Your friends.with with those fucking jerks! No! Don't touch me! Get the fuck away!" I scream at him. I felt completely bad as I stare at his hurt expression. He wanted to comfort me. I can't though. If he's gonna be friends with assholes and have a girlfriend who wants him for money, then so be it. Let him get hurt. I don't give a fuck, even though I know that's a lie.

"Frankie..." he stammers. I continued crying and ran inside. "Frank!" he chased after me. I ran into the lunch room and stood before the jocks. They laughed at me and looked at Gerard when he came running in. They held their hands on my shoulders. I couldnt move.
"Taught him a lesson, Way?" They ask him. I hoped he changed his mind. I'm testing him. He just nods and looks at me. My heart broke. He still wants to be friends with them. I start crying, they laugh at me. One of them pulled Gerard towards them. Lyn-Z jumps on him kissing him.
"Don't worry baby, that faggot won't tear us apart." Her words pierced my ears. I kept crying and Gerard kept staring at me. The jocks kept laughing and laughing. Lyn-Z cooing at Gerard.

Gerard was scared, I understand. He didn't stand up for me at all. I kept crying curled on the floor until Ray came and saved me. Mikey was sitting there with no idea what is going on and had a shocked face. Ray scooped me up and pushed passed some jocks for us.

"Hey Gerard did he tell you he's gay?!" he shouts. My stomach dropped and I thought this was the end of me. That fucking twit!!! Told him I was gay. I didn't want him to know. I didn't even bother seeing Gerards face. I wanted to get away. Away from life.

Ray carried me out trying to comfort me. I cried into his chest. "Dude your worth more than my love for music," he says, "that's saying something." I laugh a little. "Thanks Ray your my best friend and always will be." We hug eachother and he smiles at me. Ray is my best friend. Fuck everybody! Fuck the world! Fuck Gerard! It's just me and Ray, the two musketeers.

I smile at him and he gives me his cute half smiles. "Ditch?" He asks me. I nod and he helped me up, we ran to the fence and jumped it. We ran to his house. I felt safe with him. We took our anger our on our guitars. We just started bashing and headbanging. I couldnt give a flying fuck about Gerard. Mikey yes, I'll still be his friend, he didnt know what was going on. The problem is how to hang with him without Gerard. They're always together. "Stop thinking about him," Ray says to me breaking my thoughts. I nod and smile at him, but I can't. Gerard already knows to much.