We Only Breathe For So Long

There were thousands of fans inside and millions still outside. It was crazy! There were so many people outside, that I couldn’t even see the streets anymore. All I could see were faces - teenage girls to be more specific. Most of them held out posters with loving words or quotes from the band. Suddenly, the bookshop didn’t seem so spacious. Now it looked as small as a chicken’s hen.

As soon as we walked out of the door and the boys came in plain sight, girls screamed. They screamed really loud, some cheered while others cried and they all seemed so happy. I had trouble reaching the counter because of the numbers of people on the way. I sat on a chair and got ready for the next couple of hours. All I was going to do was sit there, watch the boys and make sure they’re all right. Talk about boredom! Just the thoughts of it already made me want my bed even more.

I watched as the boys made their way on to the mini-stage and as they sat down, uncapping their markers and getting ready to start signing. The security guard let the first three girls go up to the stage. When I arrived at the store this morning, they were there already. I couldn’t possibly imagine at what time they actually arrived here. But that didn’t seem to matter for them because they got to see the boys. And oh boy, were they happy! It was really gratifying to watch the amazement stamped all over their faces. They didn’t know whether they should be crying or smiling, asking questions or getting a hug, talking or just staring. Inside, I knew they desired to do it all but time wouldn’t let them. It wasn’t quite fair. Most of these girls never went to bed because the anxiety wouldn’t allow sleep to enter their minds. They had to wake up way before dawn and wait out on the cold in front of a store for hours. And all the restless nights and hours of waiting only bought them a couple of minutes with their idols. It definitely wasn’t fair.

Eric was a few feet away from me; he was working as the cashier today. He was scanning the books and getting the change as fast as he could because the line didn’t get any smaller. It only got bigger and bigger.

There were many voices buzzing. The boys talking with their fans, the girls in the line talking to each other and the music that was playing in the background to make things more pleasant. I had to raise my voice in order for Eric to hear me.

“Hey!” I shouted. “Have you seen Greg around? He disappeared with Sophie and he’s still not back.”

I was worried that something might’ve happened because Sophie would’ve never missed this, not in this lifetime.

“I don’t know, haven’t seen them. But don’t worry, they’ll eventually show up,” he said.

Eric had work up to his sleeves; there were so many people. I decided to be useful somehow and help him out. While I scanned the barcodes and placed the book in a plastic bag, Eric received the money and gave the customer’s change back if needed.

“I thought these guys weren’t famous,” commented Eric after remembering what Greg had said about their celebrity status.

“I thought so too! I guess we were wrong. I mean, look at all these girls. It looks like the entire female teenage population decided to come by today,” I said with a shocked face while putting a book inside a paper bag.

“This is nothing! My bed has seen more people,” said Eric with a smirk while looking sideways at me.

I laughed as hard as I laugh to most of Eric’s jokes. He was the funniest person I’ve ever known. He turned everything into a joke and made me laugh no matter what the situation was. As I laughed my nerves away, he chuckled and kept looking at me. I could feel his eyes on me and I didn’t mind, it was comforting. It wasn’t nerve-wracking at all.

“I could never go to a funeral with you or else we’d end up getting kicked out. You would make a funny comment with the most serious face ever, and I wouldn’t be able to control my laughter. Then we’d both laugh hysterically and look like total idiots. And then be kicked out. And laugh some more,” I told him as my smile never left my face.

He laughed along with me while showing his perfectly white teeth. “Ah, c’mon! Look on the bright side. We would look like hot idiots.”

I could never get tired of talking to Eric. A topic always popped up and it would be the most random and funniest thing ever. I asked myself the same question he asked me earlier on. Why didn’t we ever try being friends like this? Always talking with each other and hanging out. Everything with him felt so easy and fun. When I was with him, I always forgot any problem I had or even who I was for a little while. He’s just one of those people who lights up the room whenever they walk in.

“But would you go to a soccer game with me?” asked Eric, he was looking down. “Well, not a stadium type of thing. It’s at my house. Greg and I always watch soccer on Saturday nights and my sister is tagging along this time. It’ll be fun.”

I didn’t have anything to do on Saturday so I figured I could do that. Eric didn’t even have to assure me that it would be fun because I knew that already. Greg and Eric would be together and that means that they’d be talking throughout the entire evening. They would probably have junk food and beer all around. And they would definitely comment about anything that happens in the game and laugh at the players. Yeah, it would totally be fun!

“Sure,” I said. A tiny smile formed on his lips, he was trying to hold it in. And that made me smile a bit.

I got so distracted with our conversation and my thoughts that I forgot to look up and check if the boys were all right. I looked up and waited a few seconds to see if anybody would look at my direction. As I looked up again with a smile pressed to my lips, John was already looking at me – as usual. I quickly hid my smile and before I could do so he was looking down, signing a book.

As time went by, I reminded myself to look up every now and then to see how the boys were doing. A few times as I looked up, John quickly shifted his eyes to another direction. One of those times, I just stood there looking at him. I didn’t really care if I was staring at him like a creepy stalker. Then again, so were the majority of the girls in this room. Every time a fan came up to him, he’d unleash his sweetest smile and talk with them for a while. He’d then sign their book and pose for a picture. He even took the picture himself sometimes. He was so chilled and he loved doing what he was doing. A smile was always to be found on his lips, it would never cease. I loved that, his smile was so wide and it went well with his eyes. After staring at him for a good five minutes, he looked towards me and our eyes met. Normally, I would’ve quickly adjusted my eyes to stare at the floor but this time I didn’t. I just smiled and kept staring. At first he had the most serious face ever and his eyes were bigger than usual, which made me laugh and made him smile.

He had to pose for a picture with one of the fans so he eventually looked away and posed for the camera. I came back to reality and started helping Eric once again.

“If we don’t have a break in the next five minutes, my hands will jump off my body,” moaned Eric.

“I agree. You go and take a break, I can handle it,” I told him and smiled softly.

He sighed in relief and sat down on one of the chairs while grabbing a book. He started paging through the book and attempting to read it but he was too tired for that so he only focused on the photographs.

“I’ve never heard these guys, they must be good.”

I just started working and I was tired already just by looking at the length of the line.

“They probably are.”

He didn’t say anything back and when I turned around, his eyes were closed and he was fast asleep.

I worked as the cashier for the rest of the day. It wasn’t easy and the line never got any smaller. It only got smaller when the clock hit 7pm. Most of the people were gone already and Jessica was even starting to close the front doors. I could see the streets again from outside the glass doors. I only had four more people to help and then I could finally head home. I was completely knackered and hungry. I didn’t have any breaks and I stood up the whole time. The day was technically over and Greg hasn’t showed up with Sophie yet. I was panicking inside and just as I was about to tell Eric to go out and look for them, they came into my sight through the back door.

As they approached the counter, I could not believe what my eyes were seeing. Sophie had a bunch of teddy bears in her hands and Greg had his face painted and he totally looked like a clown. But not a good clown, he looked like the freaking Joker.

“Where the hell have you guys been?” I asked them with a pissed off tone to my voice. “What’s up with all the stuffed creatures? And Greg, there’s a little face to your painting,” I crossed my arms on my chest.

“We were down at this new arcade they opened on 5th Street. It’s so cool, Kylie! You guys should totally check it out,” said Greg as excited as a child playing with his favorite toys.

“I thought you guys were abducted by rapists or something!” I raised my voice.

“You know I’d never miss this, Kylie. We just lost track of time,” said Sophie with an apologetic look. “Besides, I’m totally calmed down. I just walked through the back doors, saw the guys and check how calm I am!” she said while smiling wide.

Greg picked up some tissues to clean his face. “Don’t get mad, Kylie. We’re sorry.”

Now he totally looked like the Joker. I saw a flash coming from behind and I turned my head around. Eric was awake with his cellphone on his hands, snapping a picture of Greg.

He laughed as he looked at Greg. “Oh well, oh well. I always knew I was Batman and that one day my archenemy would show up!”

Greg looked at him and did a mocking face. “Whatever Assman.”

As Eric and Greg were calling each other names and Sophie and I were laughing at them, the boys came up to us. Once I saw them by the counter too, I looked around and the store was empty. There was only us, everybody else was gone. It was weird to see the bookshop vacant since it was filled with people a few hours ago.

“I think that went really well,” said Pat while going over the counter to sit on the chair next to Eric.

“Yeah, it totally did! I thought it would never end though, there were so many people!” Garrett spoke with his eyebrows raised in amazement.

The other guys just nodded in agreement and remained silent. You could see how worn out they were. Their eyes were so small that they looked Chinese.

“Anyways, we’re got to head back to our bus and hibernate for awhile before your crazy boss comes!” said Kennedy.

Jared nodded his head. “Yeah, she’s freaky.”

“Before you go, could you guys please sign my book?” asked Sophie while holding her book.

“Of course,” said Kennedy.

Sophie looked at him with nothing but love in her eyes. She looked like a puppy about to get fed or something. It was cute the way she liked Kennedy so much.

They all signed her book and she couldn’t be any happier.

“Thank you so much, you guys are amazing!” she said excitedly. “I can’t wait until Monday, I’m going to most of the shows!”

“Really?” John finally spoke.

She looked at me. “We wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“Oh, the both of you?” asked Jared.

Sophie and I spoke together. “Yeah.”

Before anybody could say anything else, their manager called them saying it was time to go.

“This is our call, thanks for everything!” said Pat.

We all hugged each other until it was time for John to hug me.

“So, you’re coming to the shows?” asked John.

“Yup.”

He laughed. “Once again, we don’t get time to really talk. Can we talk tomorrow over lunch or something?”

I didn’t wait a second to reply back. “Of course,” I smiled.

“Great!” he said with a relieved smile. “Would you mind giving me your digits? You know, so that I can tell you the time and place.”

I gave him my phone number and he hugged me. His long arms were wrapped around my shoulders. He had to bend down slightly in order to reach me and I stood on my tiptoes. I hugged his torso and my head was pressed against his chest. I could smell his perfume and it was so good. It was a quick hug and I wished it lasted longer.

“See you tomorrow then,” said John while walking backwards towards the door with a smile on his thin lips.

“I’ll see you then,” I replied and smiled.